Madonna, Clay Aiken in Top 50 Worst Songs Ever

Our friends at Blender Magazine have published a terrific list of the "Worst 50 Songs Ever." (A quick hat tip to them for not writing Worst. 50. Songs. Ever.) Big names like Madonna and Clay Aiken we're right near the top.

Clay's "invisible" comes in at #11. Blender says:

"It's not just the schmaltzy play for loser pity ("If I was invisible - wait, I already am"). It's not just the ridiculously purple lyrics. And it's not just the thought of Aiken's eternally asymmetrical porcupine 'do quivering as he soars into a high note. It's the whole hey-girl-I-want-to-watch-you-while-you-think-you're-alone-in-your-bedroom thing that transforms this song from a merely mediocre ballad to a disturbing voyeur fantasy, filling your head with images of Aiken downloading porn and thinking bad things about that girl from homeroom. What lurks in the hearts of lonely geeks? Clay Aiken knows, and it's not pretty." 



Madonna didn't escape Blender's wrath either. "American Life" is at #10: 

"On which Madonna updates the "Material Girl"–era satire of commercialism and spiritual emptiness - but this time, she does it with what is hands-down the most embarrassing rap ever recorded. Nervous and choppy, she makes Debbie Harry sound as smooth as Jay-Z. The only thing worse than shouting "soy latte"? Rhyming it with "double shot-ay." The rhymes don't kick in for a full three minutes, but the song - propelled by a constipated digital beat and some bungled musings on celebrity culture - stinks the whole way through. "

Hey, Beavis they said "constipated"  - Uh huh huh huh.  Notably, Limp Bizkit comes in at #4, with "Rollin'" - my question is how did the rest of the Bizkit catalog escape the list?

Reader Comments

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16. Watching Clay's quivering porcupine do could only be topped by seeing him brush his new hot bangs out of his eyes...If I were invisible....sigh.....

Posted at 11:13PM on Jun 21st 2006 by lisa

17. Wow, the inclusion of a Clay Aiken song on the Blender list sure made some people angry! Easy on the outrage there, people! No matter what your opinion of the guys talent (modest), the simple fact is, even the greats (not Clay) have some misses...

Heck, even if I went only by the Blender list, I can find several artists on there with more talent than him (Beatles, Billy Joel, Simon & Garfunkel, REM), that are guilty of a bad song. It happens to the best of them. Deal.

Posted at 11:38PM on Jun 21st 2006 by Dave

18. Like Tony the tiger says " It's Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrreat!!!!! American Life Is a great song. Madonna rocks, and shocks. No one does it better. Let me hear you sing american Life or Invisible!!!!

Posted at 11:52PM on Jun 21st 2006 by hilda

19. Amen to what caforalways said. May I add that others are negative to Clay because of his path to stardom. To me he is a very talented and charismatic performer with a pure, uplifting and powerful voice. I will continue supporting Clay and will buy MANY of his CDs especially the upcoming ones. God bless Clay!

Posted at 12:15AM on Jun 22nd 2006 by Fely

20. the one who said she downloaded invisible is such an obvious "visible" claymate that it is pathetic. What a joke. That is the claymate ploy. Pretend that someone who bashes his work turns someone else on to it and they love it. So obvious.

Posted at 1:03AM on Jun 22nd 2006 by sandy

21. I believe that the writer of this article needs to get his facts straight. Although I'm not a big Clay Aikin follower , I do live in the area he is from. Clay Aikin has never been in trouble for child pornogrophy, or even accused of it. This charges were brought on his father. Check your facts next time!

Posted at 3:28AM on Jun 22nd 2006 by Ann Muntzen

22. Madonna's American Life is supposedly the 10th worst song, what a load of crap. not only was it a great song on so many levels it was probably one of the most original songs in years. Maybe the rap wasnt that great but Madonna never claimed to be a great rapper, she gave it a go and did her best and over 3 million people bought it, so if more people were not so scared of being different and voicing their opinions and being republican bores the world would be a better place then it is at the moment. Who decided this list and what songs have they wrote or released? Madonna 210million records sold the list maker NOTHING.

Posted at 3:34AM on Jun 22nd 2006 by michael Harris

23. I saw a music video on BET that had rappers sliding credit cards thru the gyrating girl butt cheeks. Yet Blender thinks Invisible is disturbing and Madonna's American Girl is a worst rap song then that??? Whatsa matter is Blender afraid to pick on the BET rappers for truly disturbing and degrading rap songs against women??!!!

Posted at 3:46AM on Jun 22nd 2006 by Taytay

24. The lyrics of popular music offer plenty of fodder. I'm surprised that you haven't picked on Madonna before... low hanging fruit is easy to pick. Or maybe you have. I have to admit that I wouldn't open the drapes to see her perform and think what she did to American Pie should have ended her "muscial" career. Her talents lie principally in re-fashioning her image every five years or so, and marketing students really should study her to learn her tricks. They'd learn more than music students. As for Clay Aiken, the other posters are right. It's a mildly creepy lyric, I suppose, but in the great wasteland that is popular music, it's a fairly innocuous little song. Now, if you were picking on him for writing it, you might have a point. But he didn't write it, and the fact that he sang it lifted it out of the gutter and put it onto the street.

Posted at 6:51AM on Jun 22nd 2006 by Vivian Grant

25. How very interesting that you didn't mention the top 9 songs on the list. One would think that would have been mentioned. Guess you just wanted the attention that such names as Clay Aiken and Madonna would generate. You did an article about a list that was generated and didn't even say what the #1 song on the list was. How odd to mention only the #10 and #11 songs. Guess you know who the big stars really are, like them or not. It's all about getting hits and you knew you would with those names up there, as well as pictures. As for Clay Aiken, he can, and does, sing the Hell out of any song he sings. He didn't have a lot of say over what went on his first CD, but he sure made the best of it. Like it or not, his fans LOVE them some "Invisible!"

Posted at 7:40AM on Jun 22nd 2006 by Pat

26. ok, i agree, both of these songs rather suck...i am not a clay aiken fan, i am sure they chose the song and he had to sing it...but madonna...i am a HUGE madonna fan...and i am embarrassed by the rap in that song. it sucks. however...we are talking about MADONNA and it doesn't matter if a min of an otherwise great song sucks...she is still going straight to the bank...
i have seen her in concert once, and plan on seeing her again in a week, she is the best, but i agree that rap would have been better left out.

Posted at 8:00AM on Jun 22nd 2006 by Sukee

27. BIG NAMES LIKE MADONNA AND CLAY AIKEN you got that right and you knew exactly who to put in the headlines of your very well written article. That of course was written in jest in case you missed it. While I agree that Invisible isn't the best song out there Clay sang the heck out of that song and that guy can sing. Clay had nothing to do with the songs on his triple platinum album. They were picked for him and he had to sing them and sing them he did. He has an amazing voice, so pure. His concerts are fantastic. He gives everything he can in his concerts. So why not choose some really disgusting songs from the rap world you know why because you supposed writers are so afraid of actually posting what you feel about those songs. Of course you can't really understand the lyrics now can you so I guess its hard to critique something you can't understand. Anyway its nice to see Clay get the recognition he deserves BIG NAMES LIKE MADONNA AND CLAY AIKEN. I'll take it. Maybe next time you want to put this song on your list you might do a little more research though and actually get some recent facts. Guess the no 1 and no. 2 people on your list wouldn't have given you the hits you wanted huh. I just love it that people know mentioning Clay Aiken will get them the hits they want so how much support Clay has doesn't it.

Posted at 8:41AM on Jun 22nd 2006 by carole

28. It is totally alright if BLENDER magazine call they worst singers. Modanna and Clay aren't worst; they are just too famous to be attacked on.

Posted at 9:07AM on Jun 22nd 2006 by Tina

29. yeah the writer might be deaf
who cares?
there may be too many bad song (rap with inappropriate lyric) to choose, therefore he chose clay aiken's song. shame on you. why did he only mention no 10 and 11 only? what is the worst song(no 1,2,3.. hellooo) ? maybe he just don't have the list.
so embarassing to know that u are a writer

Posted at 10:37AM on Jun 22nd 2006 by -clayfan-

30. Ok #3...New Clayfan...thats such a lie..you know your some lunatic Claymate

Posted at 11:08AM on Jun 22nd 2006 by Rich Duvall

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