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"Lost" Diary: I Do

11/9/2006 2:09 PM PST BY TMZ STAFF

Welcome back to another edition of the "Lost" Diary. Tonight is the final episode of 2006 and everyone has their "this better be good" face on tonight. Thirteen weeks is a long time between episodes!

Wednesday night also happened to be the same night as TMZ's one-year anniversary party, so I am writing this slightly hungover on Thursday morning, and I didn't watch it with my usual posse. And that kinda sucks. If the "Lost" Diary is about anything, it's about watching this show with your peeps. "Lost" isn't my favorite show, but it's my favorite show to watch. I hope some of you out there have started your own "Lost" night with your friends. Good times.

Enough with the sentimental BS, on with the show!!!

10:00 -- Kate flashback time, and I can't say I'm excited that it's her turn tonight. So she was going to marry a cop, huh? Odds he survives the episode? -- I'm at 50/50 right from the get-go.

10:02 -- Henry Gale flashed Jack the weirdest little half-smile I have seen from him -- a sign of worry, almost.



10:03 -- "I didn't say I was going to do it; I just wanted you to understand how you're going to die." -- Jack. His brain is fried. Would you want him operating on your spine at this point?

10:04 -- "At least you won't have to be disappointed for very long." -- Jack. One word: Ha!

10:08 -- Two things about the Kate/Monica flashback; first, the cop looks like Jason Bateman. Second, when Kate said she had to hold her breath to get into her dress, I'm guessing that every woman watching the show threw something at the screen and muttered something like, "Yeah right! What is she, a size two?"

10:10 -- A moment of silence for Eko. "What happened to him?" chimes in the new girl. For the love of the hatch, please make her shut up!!!

10:11 -- "I believe Eko died for a reason." -- Locke. Me too, my man. Me too.

10:12 -- Did Alex just attempt to break out Kate and Sawyer with a slingshot? Who is she, Dennis the Menace? And when Alex yelled out, "They're gonna kill your boyfriend," to whom was she referring?

10:16 -- Juliet vs Kate, the tale of the tape. I'll give Kate the hotness victory, but Juliet is far more conniving -- which I kinda dig -- and that's saying something. If it came down to a one-on-one fight, I think Juliet would find a way to pull it out. Not that I am suggesting some kind of wrestling match. Do they even have hot oil on the island? I'm just distracted now. So, they're gonna kill Sawyer...

10:18 -- Someone interesting better be at this wedding, otherwise, I do not get these flashbacks at all. Did she just marry Henry Gale's kid or something? It better be good.

10:20 -- "I'll give you some privacy." -- Juliet. No you won't. Stop lying.

10:21 -- Jack and Kate reunited. If Henry Gale's goal was to make Jack want to save his life, he's done the EXACT OPPOSITE. Jack would kill Henry if he had the chance. The way things are moving here, I have a minor prediction (which will, of course, be wrong): the episode ends with Jack saying something like "Scalpel" as he begins the operation.

10:28 -- Kate's calling the Marshall who is chasing her. It's all very "Out of Sight." And boring.

10:30 -- Not that I think they're going to kill Sawyer, but if they did, would every woman stop watching? Just asking.

10:31 -- "Lift up your eyes and look north." -- Eko's stick. Mildly cryptic.

10:32 -- "Because I wanted you to believe we had a damn chance." -- Sawyer. The Others succeeded in breaking these two, that's for sure.

10:34 -- Time for a little cage lovin'. Sweaty, dirty cage lovin'. Sorry, I'll be quiet.

10:40 -- Two tickets to Costa Rica, huh? Something tells me Kate/Monica isn't too keen on leaving the country. Seriously, the payoff on these flashbacks better be good.

10:42 -- Sawyer is a cuddler -- would not have guessed that. "I love you, too." -- Sawyer. The collective "awwwwwwww" from every woman in America must have been deafening.

10:44 -- Who let Jack out of his cage?

10:45 -- "Tomorrow." -- Jack. Dr. Shephard is gonna operate, y'all.

10:50 -- Kate's never actually seen Henry Gale, has she? (Ed.'s note: Of course she has, the damn breakfast on the beach! I am an idiot).

10:51 -- Kate/Monica confession time. Giving back the locket was a nice touch.

10:53 -- I haven't been this excited for a spinal surgery in an underground bunker on a hidden island in the middle of nowhere in my entire life. Ever.

10:54 -- "Whatever happens, everything will very different, won't it?" -- Henry Gale. If he dies, so help me ABC, you will feel my wrath. Wait, they took Alex "home last night" -- what does that mean? Why is he asking about her? Did Henry Gale and Rousseau get it on? Oh, and I was almost right about the scalpel thing. Damn. Half credit at least, right?

10:55 -- "Shephard wasn't even on Jacob's list." -- Pickett. Am I blanking here? Who is Jacob?

10:56 -- Jack is making his play. He wants to have his cake and eat it too.

10:57 -- Is Kate playing Sawyer and Jack on behalf of the Others? It's all just a little too convenient. I don't know, maybe I am talking out of my backside here. I have had people tell me they think Kate is an Other and I don't buy it for a second, but now, I don't know.

10:59 -- "Kate damn it, run!" -- Jack.

Time to figure out what we learned here...

Kate doesn't like running... Um, I'm blanking here... Wow, this isn't good... Think McFly... Damn!!!!

These six episodes of "Lost" have been like a lapdance (or so I've heard). I have paid (with time, not dollars) for the privilege of being teased. Instead of lasting one song (unless I have a coupon, or it's a Tuesday afternoon -- wait Mom, don't read that) this teasing has lasted for six weeks. And much like a lapdance, there has been no real payoff.

Look, "Lost" can do ABSOLUTELY NOTHING that would make me stop watching. If the entire show were acted out with puppets, I'd watch. Actually, that would be awesome.

Anyway, I've invested over two years of my life into this show, and like it or not, I am seeing this thing through to the end. I give tonight's episode a D -- horrible flashback, no payoff on anything... nothing happened. Luckily, I got drunk last night, so there's always that.

Question of the week: "Lost" returns in February... will you be back? You know my answer. See you in 13 weeks!

62 COMMENTS

No Avatar
31.

?    

Well I hate to admit but I feel stupid here. I've watched every episode at least 3 times in season 1; probably twice in season 2 except for the season finale when I was overseas where they were just beginning the 2nd season. I've watched every season 3 program so maybe I got bored a little and went into a zone of my own but I don't know about Alex or half of these 'Other' characters or the tallies. Did I really miss that much in one finial episode when all the rest seem to take forever to progress?

2843 days ago
32.

Plutomio    

I did like that show very much. I have a huge crush on Nathan Filion anyway ;)
You can count me in. In February I will be eagerly awaiting on Thursday to read your column.
Cheers

2843 days ago
33.

JC    

If Sawyer gets knocked off I will not watch any more. That's where I draw the line.

2843 days ago
34.

Laurel    

i think Jacob might be the eye patch guy watching all the cameras.

2843 days ago
35.

Kate Shaw    

I quit watching after the second episode this year, I think. Sometimes I even forget it was on at all. But I like your commentary.

I will watch the last episode on DVD to see how it comes out. Til then I'll enjoy the commentary and skip the dreck.

2843 days ago
36.

Misty    

Am I mistaken or is the cop Kate gets married to the same guy Anna Lucia killed? Not the guy she impaled with a stick but the other guy. Ethan? I don't know. There are too many damn storylines to keep everyone straight!

2843 days ago
37.

Trish    

I don't believe anyone who says they won't watch Lost any more. If you've watched it this far, you're hooked.

Having said that, I have more questions than I did at the beginning of the season.

Why wouldn't Henry Gale and The Others welcome the passengers to the island and ask nicely for surgical help?

Introducing new characters and then killing them off is getting old. It's stretching the story of the main characters out and it's frustrating.

But Lost is still better than other TV!!! ....... til Feb.........

2843 days ago
38.

Mad Balls    

Great production values , superb acting , nice writing but if I wanted a show about nothing I'd watch Seinfield reruns ....ANyways "Heroes" is better written and I just can't get over how much the senator looks like Jeff gordon .......

SAVE THE CHEARLEADER >>>> SAVE THE WORLD !!!!!!!!!!!!!

2843 days ago
39.

jenn    

am i the only one that thought kevin was ethan??

2843 days ago
40.

Maria    

I don't know who writes this Diaries... I'll have to check that...but I LOVE IT...it's so funny ...and I couldn't agree with you more. I have to see the end of this..no matter what..there's no way back...and I think most people are on the same page.
This episode was very boring...I hate Kate ...haaaaaaaaaaate her....I hate her flashbacks even more.
I'm confused now I'm actually starting to think that Ben is not that bad after all....can't wait for Next season

2843 days ago
41.

toilet still works    

Umm when they went to get Sawyer to kill him at the end...did they say HE WASNT EVEN ON THE TOP OF "JACOB's LIsT?" Did i hear that right? Who the hello is Jacob then? Also, i think the thing to look for is the relationship between Benry and Alex? What is the deal there?
Also, when are we getting rid of the newbies...everytime they talk i find myself shoosing them...they are like annoying people who interupt you when you are trying to watch the show...GET THEM OFF

2843 days ago
42.

toilet still works    

Wait..what i want to know is WHERE ARE THE CHILDREN FROM THE TAilsection????? Where woudl they be? Are they ever going ot mention them again? Also, where is Clue that took care of Walt last year. They have shown every other Other...why not her? I know maybe she was only signed up for two episodes..but it makes me wonder...
I refuse to use the newbies names bc I hate their characters...but why is the girl one walking around with perfectly curled hair? I mean I almost threw up when I heard someone say they liked them...they look like tourists or something to the island..they better have been put in these two episodes just as a sick joke....the creators better nto be serious
I AM In AGREEMENT...I MISS DANIELLE...I love how Sayid use to say her name too...shell be back in Feb I KNOW IT

2843 days ago
43.

curlygirl    

You have just made my day...haven't laughed out loud in a long time...thanks!

2842 days ago
44.

blaze latrail    

I agree if they kill off Sawyer, I will quit watching. Why is that guy so mad at Sawyer, I thought Sun killed his girlfriend, not Sawyer. What did Sawyer do to that guy?

2842 days ago
45.

Jolene    

I was an avid fan of LOST until they started airing only a few episodes and then having a long break between the next episodes airing. I TIVO'd the last 3 and when I watched them the other night I must admit I was BORED. I have moved on to a new series to replace this series that is very sporatic in the new shows.

2842 days ago
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