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The Z List - This Week's Biggest Losers 05/05/07

5/5/2007 4:02 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF

SplashNewsOnline.comNews of a Toastee Toof sex tape this week caused about as much excitement as the notion of "Flavor of Love 3." So instead, we prefer to hit rewind on some of the folks who embarrassed themselves with their clothes on.

Paris Hilton: Somewhere, deep down in Nostradamus' predictions, we believe the great seer foresaw that when both "Girls Gone Wild" guru Joe Francis and Bentley fender bender Paris Hilton were simultaneously served with jail time, it would be a portentous sign that the party was coming to an end. In the wake of yesterday's 45 days probation violence sentence, everything suddenly takes on new meaning for Paris: her cell, her sidekick, her bitch ... and who would have thought that of all the recent celebrity DUI-ers, it would be the unflappable Ms. Hilton who would get yanked straight past Malibu rehab to actually pay for her crime. It's a bonanza, of course, for us here at TMZ, but September 7, 2006 (the date she was arrested in Hollywood last fall) is now her September 11.

Charles BarkleyCharles Barkley: For anyone who watched "Inside the NBA" following the stunning Dallas Mavericks - Golden State Warriors elimination game on Thursday, it was a new benchmark in role model pouting. The TNT color commentator was crestfallen that the outcome of another Game Six earlier in the day between Utah and Houston meant that he was going to have to cancel a trip to Vegas today for the Oscar De La Hoya - Floyd Mayweather Jr. fight. Even Ernie Johnson and Kenny "the Jet" Smith seemed taken aback as Chuck connected the dots for the first time, on air. It was at once hilarious, weird and inappropriate (via Barkley's hyping of TNT's Saturday night pay-per-view competition). We're not sure who Barkley has his pugilistic money on, but if his wager comes up short, it could get even uglier.

John PetersJon Peters:
It's not quite on the scale of a "thoughtless little pig" bicoastal voice mail, but it's still cold. As cold as the overnight feel of terrazzo and brass for Hollywood Boulevard's homeless. Just as mega-producer Peters ("Batman", "Superman Returns") was getting out of his limo on Monday, with kids in tow to accept a star on the Walk of Fame, a process server slapped him with very different kudos: legal papers from his third ex-wife, Christine Forsyth. Peters, who has countered Forsyth's unpaid child support claims with the you're-living-free-in-my-mansion defense, hasn't been this shown-up since a 1996 book that chronicled his Sony executive suite excesses. Maybe he can commiserate with Eminem, the male star he hopes to coerce into yet another version of "A Star is Born."

chloe sevigneyChloë Sevigny: Speaking of Paris, this gal thinks she's trashy. So there. In an entirely irritating interview with Style Magazine, the 32-year-old co-star of "Zodiac" covers the gamut; from non-simulated on-screen sex (she regrets the famous scene with ex-boyfriend Vincent Gallo in "The Brown Bunny"), to the lure of 4:20 (it started when she was a kid). People either love or hate Sevigny's generally mopey onscreen M.O., but save the misdirected PR for when you actually have something worthwhile to promote, girl. Coming on the heels of a New York Observer article last month that categorized Sevigny, Clare Danes and upcoming FOX sitcom star Parker Posey as has-beens, it's enough to make one pine for "Bunny," which Roger Ebert called the worst film in the history of the Cannes Film Festival.

sargentAlvin Sargent: The heavyweight, two-time Oscar-winning screenwriter ("Julia," "Ordinary People") was brought back by brothers Sam and Ivan Raimi to ensure that "Spider-Man 3" had the same zip as "Spider-Man 2." But the 75-year-old elder statesman is getting zapped by the critics for what they feel is a tediously tangled story web, knocking Spidey's stock down a bearish 30 points (from "Spider-Man 2's" 93% Tomatometer rating to a "Spider-Man 3" Friday score of 62%). We all know this summer's first blockbuster is critic-proof, destined to set a gargantuan new domestic B.O. record this weekend in a record 4,252 theaters. But maybe Alvin should plan on shuffleboard with the 84-year-old Stan Lee rather than any grandiose plans for more melodrama.

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Ding dong the bitch is gone! Hope she doesn't get out early!

2727 days ago


Yes exactly, but she DIDN'T kill anyone, and therefor like it or not the rules have to fit the appropriation of the CRIME! I think there is a bandwagon here, the "LETS MAKE A HUGE POINT THAT RICH PEOPLE ARENT ABOVE THE LAW" bandwagon, it's a bit sad, outdated, immature perhaps.

2727 days ago


I just don't get this girl. She is ugly and the only reason she gets attention is because she puts herself out there with the money. If she had no money, no one would pay any attention to her. Look at her. She is ugly.

I am glad she is going to jail. She thinks she is above the law. Now she will learn she is not. She is just another ugly girl with money.

2727 days ago


Yoko Ono & Rosie are protesting the verdict handed down to Paris by staging a 3 day bed-in at the Dakota. Elliot Mintz who was John & Yoko`s publicist ,and now represents Ms.Hilton thinks this is a "swell idea". Walking on thin ice will be played non-stop till Paris is released.No word on whether Lionel Richie can get enough musicians together for a We are the world--- Part 2 benefit. Sanjaya is the only one to sign on as a performer. The end of Western Civilazation as we know it.... Truly pathetic!!!!!

2727 days ago


ok-my second comment. number 66 nobody's going to sign that so get a life. you are a mental midget. a first class moron. i went on that site to see how many people signed that dumbass petition and NOBODY did b/c everybody thinks she deserves jail time-except people who are socially retarded like you. you can go shave your back now. and doesn't have anything about it on his website b/c he's a gay little bitch who's just kissing paris' ass. but seriously everybody tons or ppl get arrested for DUI it's not just her so stop being to hard on her im 100% none of you are perfect nd neither is she.

2727 days ago


I love how she gets 45 days in jail when in actuallity she should not be getting her license back for seven years. That is the reality of it, in real life people who are not famous deal with these issues everyday. I hope she realizes that a 26 year old should not be acting like a 16 year old. You already went to Utah Paris do you need it again?

2727 days ago


"In the wake of yeaterday's 45 days probation violence..." That's a term with which I am unfamiliar.

2727 days ago

Only swim in the Ocean    

TMZ, your reference to 9/11 is sick and twisted!

2727 days ago


So tired seeing her in the magazines! She is not beautiful, she's 'interesting'. Without money, she (and her mom) would be working as (what?). They are both snooty and feel they own the world. Let's hear more about 'real' people that are nice that happen to be filthy rich!


2727 days ago


Uh, nice photo TMZ! lol
those late nights sure are getting to her.

2727 days ago

who cares?    

she will hit the Wall soon~ look at that face!

2727 days ago


#75...Before you attempt to evaluate another's mental acuity, learn to spell MIDGET. And above all....SPEAK ENGLISH!!

2727 days ago


And somewhere in the far distance you can hear Nicole, Lohan, Greasy Bear, and even Joe Francis, laughing their asses off.

2727 days ago


Whew, the hard miles are already showing up on this broad's face. Booze and dope don't have an impact on your body, nahh.

2727 days ago


So, here's the thing about jail: when you first get in, there's usually a few days before money can be put on your books. That means, for a few days, Paris wil have nothing but a welfare pack. Some shampoo, soap, and deodorant that doesnt do squat when you start sweating in jail issues. Can you imagine what the chick looks like without makeup, hair products, decent clothes, nothing?
As much as she annoys me, if she handles it right, doesn't whine, shares the wealth, just sucks it up and does the time, I'll be impressed.

2727 days ago
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