Train Wrecks
Gummi Bear Loves Mr. Chow!

Where has he been? Where does he go?
We want to see! We want to know!
Of the camera, Gummi is not fond,
and tries to hide behind a blonde.

"I'll just get in the car," he then declares,
and flops inside, the Bear despairs.
"Pay it!" he tells the blonde, of the valet,
the smoking bear is soon on his way!

He wants to speak, he knows he does!
It's so hard not to, he twitches because!
Then in a puff of smoke, and flash of cash,
the Gummi Bear can make a dash!

He may not do well getting into a club,
and it's not fair, he's just a cub,
but no matter if it's night or day,
Mr. Chow will never turn him away!

Tags: Jason Davis, JasonDavis

Reader Comments

(Page 3 of 5) Previous 15 Comments | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Most Recent | Next 15 Comments

31. Billionaire stock speculator and philanthropist Warren Buffett refused to lavish his children with the proceeds of his diligent work, insisting they make it on their own. To my knowledge they did exactly that, utilizing their own resources to grow both financially and emotionally. Contrast that with these two unbearable bears and one can see by the smug entitlement expressions on their faces which approach works best. These guys are a joke and the reason TMZ profiles them is because they are out-of-control trains heading for a big wreck and secretly or not so secretly we LOVE when a**holes derail. Hopefully both of these tired blobs won't take anyone with them on their spiral down.

Posted at 12:19PM on Jun 27th 2007 by Piglet Baldwin

32. That's DISGUSTING!!! How can you let yourself get that FAT?!?!!!? They should wire his jaws shut and not let him eat until his BMI is no longer in the triple digits.

Posted at 12:21PM on Jun 27th 2007 by troy mcclure

33. .................."Gummi Bear" is nothing more than an insult to GAYS everywhere..............

Posted at 12:22PM on Jun 27th 2007 by Ask Me How I REALLY Feel

34. How about we name him "Dummi Bear"? First, smoking = diabetes, overweight, high blood pressure, definite candidate for a major stroke. Wow. Need more? He should join weight watchers, or something and really become a celebrity. What an elephant!

Posted at 1:13PM on Jun 27th 2007 by que pendejadas

35. *On my knees, hands held up in fervent prayer, looking upwards towards Heaven*

"Dear Jesus with your Tab Hunter looks and swimmer's physique, puh-LEEZE smite this fat bastard."

"Or shut him up for eternity. Whichever."

Posted at 12:24PM on Jun 27th 2007 by Prick up Your Ears

36. Why does TMZ even bother to give this sad-sack the time of day?

Posted at 1:06PM on Jun 27th 2007 by Hair-helmet

37. Who the hell is this fat dork?

Posted at 1:00PM on Jun 27th 2007 by American Pride

38. HE LOOKS LIKE A WALKING ADVERTISEMENT FOR A TRIPLE HEART ATTACK....I MEAN BYPASS.

Posted at 12:58PM on Jun 27th 2007 by Mel

39. Judging by his hefferness and smoking habits he should drop dead any moment.

Posted at 12:58PM on Jun 27th 2007 by Alanna

40. I'm reminded of those lines from "Animal House"
"Fat, drunk and stupid
is no way to go through life."



Posted at 1:00PM on Jun 27th 2007 by Laughing at a child

41. Is it just me or does this guy look like one big pompass ass who wouldn't know a days work if it hit him upside the head?

Posted at 1:03PM on Jun 27th 2007 by Tired and Ready for A Nap

42. Must have been all you can eat night at Mr. Chow, go get it Scummi Bear!!!

Posted at 1:06PM on Jun 27th 2007 by SlappDaddy

43. Three words for the bloated:
"Biggest Loser" 2008.
Or he could buy a Steinway for his burial box.

Posted at 9:58PM on Jun 28th 2007 by homemadecookie

44. Dude, get yourself some nutrisystem fast!!

Posted at 1:08PM on Jun 27th 2007 by Avamp1

45. Oh Gummie, Oh Gummie.
I am at a loss for words every single time, every single time!
I dont know why it is that I want to punch you in that baubble head of yours???

Posted at 1:11PM on Jun 27th 2007 by quack quack

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