Now that they've settled in L.A., there's one aspect of American celebrity that Posh & Becks just won't tolerate -- the ubiquitous pantyless crotch shot! Sideways smile for the camera!

With his wife sporting one of her typical too-tight-to-sit-down dresses, David came to Posh's aid by using his hand to cover up her spicy lady parts from the prying eyes of paps. Hey, it's Victoria's secret!

If only Paris, Britney and Lindsay had a hunky blonde soccer stud to guard their goal posts! Score!