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The Elfman Has Landed

7/30/2007 6:22 PM PDT BY TMZ STAFF

Jenna ElfmanScientolomom Jenna Elfman has given silent birth to a son, Story Elias, weighing in at 7 pounds, 2 ounces. Meet your future hubby, Suri!

Somehow, Jenna and husband Bodhi Elfman were able to keep the news a scientolosecret -- as the Thetan tyke was born a week ago, on July 23. Very sneaky, sis!

In a statement, Jenna's rep revealed that Story is already a fan of "classical music, a clean diaper, mom's boobs and long naps." What? No couch jumping?!


59 COMMENTS

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1.

quita    

She is such a has-been!

2586 days ago
2.

Donald    

Our 3-year old son is named Story. He was named after 5-time NASA shuttle commander Dr. Story Musgrave.

The name is Norse. A solid Viking name. It derives from Storr, which means Large. Large in stature. Large in achievement. Large.

As a surname, it has often been passed down as a girl's name.

But it would appear things are changing.

(Oh, on a strange note, our Story's best friend is named Elias.)

2580 days ago
3.

Patti    

congrats to jenna and bodhi and a big smooch to cutie story.

wow, so many bored, obviously misereable people commenting on someone else's happy occasion, what else is new.... well, for anyone with a knot of sense in them who may be wondering about some of the issues raised, let me clear them up:

hubbard recommended the barley formula over breast milk in the context that contemporary diets are, for the most part, not what they used to be, and a contemporary mother, generally under-nutrified and overworked, can either pass on her bad diet to her kid or can fortify the heck out of him with a staple that yes, kept the roman army going and more recently, the russian olympic team going. okay, so that handles the big mystery there.

for the record, i'm a scientologist, i keep a pretty good diet, lots of organic stuff and will probably go vegan raw with the occasional antibiotic/pesticide-free cooked meat and meals mixed in, for at least three months before i get pregnant and then continue that diet throughout and after my pregnancy (lots of discipline required, wish me luck!), so i feel pretty confident my breast milk will be good nutrition for my kid and i love the bonding factor that breastfeeding gives so i look forward to that, but i will still probably do the barley formula as well as i've heard great things about it. i'll try it and give my kid whatever he needs. okay, so i just demonstrated i can think for myself, well that handles the "non-individual" rumor.

next, using scientology, i got my brother out of two comas, much to the surprise of the intensive care unit workers and, again, using scientology, cured his post-accident amnesia, much to the surprise of his hospital-assigned psychologist, who had just run an official psych test on him and determined he definitely had amnesia and due to the severity of his injuries, may never get his memory back. this psychologist was so happily astounded at my, in about 10 minutes, ability using scientology to bring my brother back to present time and well aware of his surroundings, that he asked me if i was some kind of a special nurse therapist and i let him know that i'm just his sister, a scientologist, and he urged me to keep up the good work. okay, so, >yawn< are you starting to see why i'm so bored with the silly comments?

what else? right, aliens. well, i hate to be the one to break it to you, but aliens are simply part of our history, present and future. don't believe me? don't need to; believe this, then:
http://www.foundationwebsite.org/TheAlienInvasion.htm
http://www.bibliotecapleyades.net/vida_alien/alien_humanitymanipulationalien01.htm
okay, so that should handle the alien jokes. >yawn<

finally, anyone who's interested in scientology enough to comment on it is welcome to find out what really goes on in, by and with scientology. there's a great new course of study that takes a person through all the basic books and lectures of dianetics and scientology, and you can buy them one by one, super affordable. you can find out all about silent births in the book dianetics: the modern science of mental health.

oh, and in 15 minutes of scientology counseling, i saved someone from a suicidal depression and he let me know it did more for him than years of psychotherapy. and did you know you could get 12 HOURS of dianetics (the predecessor to scientology) auditing for about $200?

in other words, more scientologists in the world is actually not a bad thing, and story's super lucky to have been born to scientologist parents. congrats again, jenna & bodhi.

2572 days ago
4.

are you new?    

god, what a dog

2588 days ago
5.

LIFE IS LIFE    

FIRST

2588 days ago
6.

anonymous    

Another Hollyweird child with a stupid name! Story?! (future scenario: "Mommy, read me a story..." Jenna" "Ok Story, what story shall I read to you?" "the story about the little girl named Apple is a nice story." Jenna: "Oh Story, you say the cutest things...")Good Grief!

2588 days ago
7.

dee    

Why do these celebrities give their children the goofiest names?

2588 days ago
8.

cha    

Keep it a secret? Naaa, I don't think many people care... if she announced it last week it would have been overseen by the Blohan drama! Oh and what a stupid name!!

2588 days ago
9.

Zenophobe Alien    

Oh God, just what we need. Another Scientologist to deal with

2588 days ago
10.

Zenophobe Alien    

Just what we need another Scientologist in this world

2588 days ago
11.

the wise old owl    

I feel sorry the child. He will have no choice but to grow up under the guidence of that awful CULT. The parents are very selfish to force that on him.

If they were interested in doing the " right thing " they would allow the child to grow up in a normal enviroment and choose which spiritual path he would like to take when he comes of age. Anyone who has done the research knows that scientology is a vile organization based on greed and asserting undo influence over their weak and gulible members. It's a shame when parents raise their children under the strict guide lines that scientology requires. No doubt that kid will grow up to be very screwed up.

2588 days ago
12.

Carl    

Story is not a bad name if you compared with "Audio Science" which actress Shannyn Sossamon named her son.

2588 days ago
13.

zoe    

What kind of stupid name is Story?????????

2588 days ago
14.

gingergirl    

God help Story when he goes to school. Can you just hear other kids saying, what's the story, Story. I think all of hollywood is nuts. That is the reason more and more people are watching reality, game shows and the news.

2588 days ago
15.

d    

classical music, a clean diaper, moms boobs and long naps sounds more like jack nickelson ...

2588 days ago
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