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Britney Fashion Violation -- The Inner Dialog

8/29/2007 2:05 PM PDT BY TMZ STAFF

Gee willikers, it must be true what they say about blondses! Ever since I reblondered my weave I'm just so frazzazzled! First I forgot to put some pants on with this top, then I ran outta gas, then I got me a pucking farking ticket! Well, at least I founded my fave-rit cowgirl boots! Yee haw! I love me these boots! I'm a Rodeo Drive cowgirl!

You know, I'm gonna pop into this here store and buy me some pants. Oh, look, I can see mah tushers in the door glass! Look how cute my tushers are! That's hot! Oh, I can't say that -- that socialist Paris says that. I'm gone have to get me some tradermark sayin' too. Um, like, "I'm fun!" or mebbe, "Ding dang!" Yah! Ding dang! Ding Dang!! And there's the paperozzis, yay! I'm gone be on TMZ again today. I do loves me that TMZ, y'all!

Love me this green pockerbook -- it's so gigoontic. Oh, heckers, ding dang! I still got Jayden's pooty diaper in thar! Shoot! PeeeeAeeeeeee U! Oh, hell, Sean's diaper's in thar too! I'll just buy me some perfume in here! I better text nanny and see what the boo boos are havin' fer vittles. Might have to git some drive thru on the way home! Ding dang! Yup, I lurrrrv it!

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