Britney's Midnight Tan: The Inner Dialog

Hey, y'all, it's me. You might notta reconnized me with my blue contract lensers and glam new mermaid weave -- but it's me, bitches! And I am so hot!

I got me a hankerin' last night at midnight for a suntan to go with my new look -- so I just grabbed one of my go-girls and headed over to the tannin' parlor. Dang, this blouse is a little snuggafied, but I loves how it makes my puppies look hungry! And I love how this white pockerbook goes with my brown cowgirl boots! This is a hot autumn look!

I don't unnerstand why peeps is so worrifcated on me. I'm fiiiine. Serriously. I never felt gooder or more togetherer. See, I'm makin' money! And I like gettin' my pitcher tooken! It's no place but uppers for me! So stop hatin' on TMZ and all them internetters -- they are makin' me money! Ohh... wait, I just had a new song idear! Gimme gimme -- gimme gimme sumpin' sumpin'. ... Oh heckers, I got sumpin' on my pantlers.

Why is that go-girl wearin' that horrbull paisley dress? I want it! Eight hunnerd thousand a month, bitches! Don't worry 'bout me and my boo boos! Gimme gimme sumpin' -- hey there Delilah -- sumpin' sumpin' what you do to meeeeeeeee... I am back!




Tags: britney spears, BritneySpears, paisley, tan

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196. Where's Uncle Mind Freak?
Ya'll remember him?
Did he do a disappearing act on our train wreck?

Posted at 1:54AM on Sep 27th 2007 by me

197. What a loser. I cant stand to look at her but I just cant stop.

Posted at 10:29PM on Sep 27th 2007 by Melissa

198. She scares me! She looks possessed in this picture!

Posted at 1:18AM on Sep 28th 2007 by YoYoYo!!!

199. Why would TMZ stop posting on Britney when it's clear TMZ has over 200 posters (Losers) posting . you all know posting means Hits. so as Long as you keep posting ,TMZ will cater to you morons, which by the way who complain you dont want Britney, but cant get enough of her.
You all hang on Britney's c-lit like it's your JOB. ding dang!!

Posted at 2:24AM on Sep 27th 2007 by SHAME

200. Shame on you -you call us posters losers and morons for posting. So what are YOU doing posting?? You're a moron and a loser too TACKY BITCH

Posted at 2:55AM on Sep 27th 2007 by Justcurious

201. she is only human! why are we so quick to judge her life, when all we have to go on is hearsay. if I were her, I would have gone crazy long ago, from the paparazzi always up my ass! people need to leave this poor girl alone! so she doesnt seem so perfect anymore? who is perfect? you? i dont think so

Posted at 3:55AM on Sep 27th 2007 by tarabelle

202. Having been a mother of two...not unlike Britney or millions of other mothers out there...I just cannot figure out WHERE she gets the energy to be out at all hours on her fun-party-club circuit!!! I was exhausted by bedtime for my kids (8:30 PM)!

Speaking of the kids....it would never have entered my train of thought or behavior to be out and about and pretty much all over the place and at all hours. Just WHO is watching and caring for those two little boys while Britney is out with her girls? Or, is all this partying going on while Kevin has them? I notice we do not see him all over the place while the boys are with him. Apparently he listens to his lawyers a little more seriously or at least, I hope he does.

Posted at 6:11AM on Sep 27th 2007 by Grandma of 4

203. Sites like TMZ exist because of the rabid interest in celebs like Britney. So its pretty stupid to log on here asking them to leave Britney alone when its you that keeps them going. As long as there is an interest in Britney, someone will be there to take the picture so stop blaming TMZ, blame yourselves.

Besides how many of us would be willing to be put in the spotlight if we could have all the millions of dollars Britney does. Poor baby, blah blah blah. Small price to pay for the cash shes made fleecing the American public with her crappy ass music. Think she'd give it all back to have her privacy again? I seriously doubt it.

Posted at 6:20AM on Sep 30th 2007 by strange_stew

204. I DON'T BLAME THE PHOTOGRAPHERS I BLAME BRITNEY THERE ARE PLENTY OF STARS THAT DON'T WANT TO PHOTOGRAPHED AND THERE NOT.
IF YOU KNOW ITS A SPOT FREQUENTED BY MANY STARS GO SOMEWHERE ELSE FOR GOD SAKES!!!! VERY SAD THAT SOME PEOPLE LIKE THE FACT SHE HAS HIT ROCK BOTTOM I AM NO BRITNEY FAN BY NO MEANS. IF SHE DIDNT WANT THE PICS TAKEN SHE WOULD TRY A LITTLE HARDER THAN SHE DOES TO AVOID THEM . THATS JUST MY OPINION
OH AND ONE MORE THING I WISH SHE WOULD DRESS LIKE THE MONEY SHE MAKES AND GOODNESS SAKES EAT WOMAN

Posted at 6:47AM on Sep 27th 2007 by LEX

205. ding dang ya'll. How'd ya'll know what was going around in my brainer. I was just sayering all that to my cuzbuzz Al an now it's visible. huhhh?!?

Posted at 7:16AM on Sep 27th 2007 by smaile

206. Is it me, or is her hairline receding?

Posted at 7:45AM on Sep 27th 2007 by drew_ill

207. I agree. I know Britney is very talked about now and stuff but can't you just leave her a lone for a little bit? This constant nit picking at her over STUPID things isn't going to help her, though it appears obvious you don't care about that. I mean really....who cares if she goes to fast food restaurants. Who doesn't? I bet your photogs fat behinds went to one or two this week! Where is the picture of that? Oh I think I'm going to BK tonight....I'll be expecting my paprazzi and I might even through in a brown purse with my black pants......stupid.

Posted at 10:16PM on Sep 27th 2007 by Jessica

208. She looks ugly and wasted. Have another bottle Britney!!

Posted at 1:23PM on Sep 27th 2007 by df

209. I think it would be great if the paps would just start ignorng this mess. I mean COMPLETELY! Just like, "Oh, it's her again. People are expectng her to be a scew up. No news here." and waking away. That would be the thing to do. Maybe then she would stop bing such a camera whore and stay home and straighten up for a while. She lives in LA where the paps are concentrated, and goes out seeking them EVERY DAY!!! Give it a rest. Even Paris Hilton takes a day off! Brit should move to rural Ohio and and go into hiding for a while. And...hasn't her hair started growing back yet????? She has a bigger receding hairline than my gramps!!!!!!!!!!

Posted at 12:41PM on Sep 27th 2007 by Tonya

210. OMG to the poster named 'L'. I hope you really aren't trying to compare Britney Spears to Elvis Presley, the King of Rock n Roll/ war veteran?

The girl is a mess. Absolute mess. Has never had any talent, but she had a cute look and rockin' abs and used to have a storybook romance (JT) which kept people interested. Now she's praying on 'any publicity is good publicity, even if its bad, it still keeps my name out there' because she has nothing else. Keep in mind, this is the girl that was tipping off the papparazzi herself about two months ago to keep her name in lights. Desperate times call for desperate measures!

The girl would be best served if someone like her manager would just make her understand that her days as a pop princess are over. She's a Mom, she's a divorcee, and she's got a lot of screwups to overcome. She should drop off the radar awhile, reinvent herself by buying a restaurant, launch a clothing line (scary thought!), and stay away from acting, singing, and please Britney, no more dancing in lingerie...!

You know what I think? Her best bet would be to get in shape and be a contestant next year on Dancing with the Stars! It does wonders for 'washed up' careers! Look at Lisa Rinna... after Melrose ended, she was done... opened Belle Gray clothing store in Sherman Oaks and fell off the radar. Danced on Dancing with the Stars and suddenly she'd headlining for Chicago! Besides, maybe ballroom dancing would 'class up' this classless white trash psycho-biatch...

Posted at 8:22AM on Sep 27th 2007 by Lost in Texas

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