Brit the Least Crazy Person in New Lawsuit

A federal prison inmate alleges that Britney Spears forced him at gunpoint to commit identity theft, to pay for her abortions, breast implants, cocaine and alcohol -- and he's seeking a temporary restraining order against her. Riiiiight.
Click to read the lawsuit
Jonathan Lee Riches was featured in a 2006 CNN documentary called "How to Rob a Bank." In a handwritten lawsuit, Riches alleges that if you watch the video closely, you can see Britney with a gun pointed at his back, forcing him to commit fraud. The Easter Bunny, however, was not involved.

Riches also claims that other surveillance video shows Britney with a joint in one hand and a detonator linked to chemicals around Riches' neck -- that would explode if she pushed the button.

Currently incarcerated for wire fraud at Federal Correctional Institution in Salters, S.C., Riches has filed lawsuits against New England Patriots coach Bill Belichick, President George W. Bush, Martha Stewart, Terry Schiavo, Jeff Gordon, Michael Vick and Steve Jobs.

Finally, Riches claims that he fears Spears will come to the prison and make him rob other inmates in order to pay for an abortion, concluding, "I'm in danger. I'm still cold and hungry."

We didn't bother contacting Britney Spears for comment.

Tags: britney spears, BritneySpears

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(Page 3 of 8) Previous 15 Comments | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Most Recent | Next 15 Comments

31. Wow.. people will say anything to get her in trouble won't they? As if she couldn't do that enough on her own.. sheesh.. this guy has obviously been hitting the pipe..

Posted at 3:22PM on Oct 12th 2007 by Chrissy

32. Why isn't this poor man in a mental institution or is his real name Corporal Klinger?
"who do I see about a section 8?" Stewie, Family Guy.

Posted at 3:33PM on Oct 12th 2007 by Leela

33. #15 - Keep your posts relavant to the topic and stop trying to promote the trainwreck. By the way, you couldn't pay me to listen to these bozo sing (if that's what you call it)

Posted at 3:12PM on Oct 12th 2007 by lissabell

34. Hmmm... she had a denator linked to chemicals around his neck.... I find that hard to belive. That sounds like a bomb to me and yeah, I don't think she's smart enough to make a bomb.

Posted at 6:06PM on Oct 12th 2007 by Amused

35. This deluded stalker guy needs to be hooked up with a female stalker, and then they can stalk eachother into perpetuity.

Posted at 3:24PM on Oct 12th 2007 by Pfffft.

36. Clearly this guy is not telling the truth--Brit couldn't mastermind the making of a ham sandwich, let alone a string of identity theft and bank robberies. He must have her confused with some other trainwreck pop slut.

But seriously, it is so clear that this guy is mentally ill and his situation is an example of a huge problem in our criminal justice system. Prison is no place for the mentally ill. The mentally ill prisoner suffers by not receiving proper medical attention and by being exposed to people who will prey on their weakness. And the prison is bogged down by the time, money and space taken up by people who need more than they can be expected to deliver.

Clearly this is a hot-button issue for me...thanks for reading the rant.

Posted at 3:28PM on Oct 12th 2007 by laloo

37. I think the only person he hasn't sued yet is me....

Oh wait, the process server is here. Rats!! Why is the Federal Government allowing him to do this and I am sure we are paying for this. Will someone declare him "coocoo for Cocoa Puffs" and lock him in a room forever. please!!

http://www.wrestlingbeltworld.com

Posted at 3:32PM on Oct 12th 2007 by Eric Walker

38. I am sure Britney did all of the above, but not Martha Stewart, Jeff Gordan, Terry Schiavo, Bill Belichik, but maybe Michael Vick, and probably George W. Bush, but DEFINITELY Britney Spears! She's ALWAYS preggers!

Posted at 3:48PM on Oct 12th 2007 by Put some Panties On, Beeyatch

39. They have medications for this kind of thing ya know!! Shouldn't the prison have him on something? Clearly delusional!!

Posted at 3:57PM on Oct 12th 2007 by amanda

40. HAHAHAHHAA - this is genuinely hilarious!!! My stomach hurts from laughing.

The funniest thing is that you wouldn't even put it past her.

Posted at 3:55PM on Oct 12th 2007 by Jo

41. What a FREAK this guy is

Posted at 4:43PM on Oct 12th 2007 by www.lake-shore.co.uk

42. TMZ, See all the losers you are drawing out of the woodwork ! Now the easter Bunny is in trouble

Posted at 4:27PM on Oct 12th 2007 by Janice

43. since when do abortions cost THAT much to the point where someone who is worth millions has to rob a bank......last time i checked they were $375!!!! hahahahahaha

Posted at 5:24PM on Oct 12th 2007 by his fav brunette

44. Britney is a total retard...

She made me go club a bunch of baby seals since if I didn't she would of flashed her nasty looking goodies at me before she clubbed me to death.

Posted at 5:35PM on Oct 12th 2007 by Noel

45. The Easter Bunny may not have been there, but I'm sure OJ was involved.

Posted at 6:27PM on Oct 12th 2007 by 2losers

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