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Parenting Coach to Britney: I'm Not a Potted Plant!

10/23/2007 2:06 PM PDT BY TMZ STAFF

TMZ has learned Britney Spears' parenting coach has submitted her report to the court, and it ain't pretty.

Sources say the two-and-a-half page report says Britney totally ignored the coach -- didn't even acknowledge her presence. The coach says she was unable to teach Britney anything, because Spears didn't want to listen.

The report, which was presented to the court yesterday and will be critical in determining if Spears should regain 50/50 custody, concludes that Britney often ignores her kids and lives in her own little world -- that Britney often disappeared and wasn't around the kids or the coach. We're told the coach has said Brit spends a lot of time on the phone and changing clothes.










And on another note y'all, that BritBrit paparazzo sock is still up for grabs on eBay!

bid on the sock



Why FBI May Have Seized Copperfield's Stuff



David Copperfield is under the FBI microscope, and now TMZ may know why.

Last week, the FBI raided Copperfield's Las Vegas warehouse and seized digital camera equipment and a hard drive to a computer -- this, after a Seattle woman accused Copperfield of sexually assaulting her in the Bahamas.

Sources now tell TMZ Copperfield designed part of his show around "a system for picking up women." During his show, David goes into the audience and chooses women to come on stage. We're told that if David likes a girl, he'll use code words with assistants like "mama" and "secrecy." The assistants mark the women on a map of the inside of the Hollywood Theater at MGM Grand. After the show, the women are brought backstage -- and that's where the profiling begins.

The women are told that David may use them in his show when he comes to their hometown. They are then photographed with a digital camera, asked questions like, "What is your favorite men's cologne?" and "Where do you like to vacation?" We're told one of those vacation spots mentioned by staff is the Bahamas, where the accuser claims she was assaulted. Copperfield owns a cluster of islands in the Bahamas -- which he bought for $50 million.

This may explain the FBI's interest in David's camera system and hard drive. If the accuser is a woman who was brought on stage, the FBI would be interested in a possible M.O.

Copperfield's attorney re-issued his earlier statement in response to this story: "It is important these allegations be put into perspective. An unidentified woman has made serious allegations against David Copperfield. Although authorities have not revealed her identity to us, we know these allegations are false because David Copperfield has never forced himself on anyone."

Anderson Cooper: Armed and Fabulous



CNN golden boy Anderson Cooper is blowin' up -- literally!
Anderson Cooper
The 40-year-old news hottie showed up to a NYC screening of "Planet in Peril" this weekend, looking extra fit and buff. Check out those guns!

360 is not only the name of Coop's program -- it's also what he benches. Lift with the knees, Andy!



Heidi Montag on the Cheap


Heidi Montag: Click to watchUsually, the sight of a bikini-clad sexy blonde writhing around in the wet sand is hot ... somehow, Heidi Montag makes it ... hilarious.

Heidi and her unlovable boyfriend, Spencer Pratt, filmed her new music video last week -- with Spencer as sole cameraman to save money -- and it was appropriately cheesy! Our favorite is the boom box. Nice touch Spence.

Montag did some of her signature spastic Mariah Carey-wannabe hand movements -- while dancing around on a jetty -- a lone fisherman completely ignoring them as they filmed. You'll have to wait your turn to be oblivious.


COMMENTS

No Avatar
76.

don    

Well she acted like she didnt have to listen to the judge in her custody case, why does anyone think she would listen to a parenting coach? She thinks she is above it all. Maybe she should learn a lessen from Leona Hemsley..who ended up in the slammer for the same attitude. All the fast food and Starbucks, she will be singing at a mall soon anyway..

2472 days ago
77.

alexi    

As usual, she WANT'S ATTENTION because she's out, 99% NOBODY likes her and it's sickning. She's UGLY, always seeing with Starbuck's drink, she'll get FAT or I should say she's VERY UGLY AND OUT OF SHAPE ALREADY ?! She's trying too hard to be on camera. Anyway, WE DON'T WANT TO SEE HER AT ALL.
BRIT, IS UGLY, UGLY, UGLY, UGLY, UGLY !!

2472 days ago
78.

Josie    

SURE.......I HAD TO CLICK ON AND POST. IT GIVES ME A CHANCE TO EXPRESS MYSELF. DOESN'T MEAN ANYTHING ELSE OTHER THAN I GET TO CLICK AND POST AND EXPRESS MYSELF. BRIT IS OLD NEWS.

2472 days ago
79.

Hoping    

She's being offered all the help under the sun.......most are not. If she won't accept it, who's to feel sorry? Most folks don't get that kind of "help" --- the kids are just taken. I agree the Papparrazzi needs to back off, but she's got to grow up too.........

2472 days ago
80.

Frieda Jane    

Once again the twit has proven just what she is...selfish, juvenile, mannerless, the list goes on and on. I know that she is not that dumb that she could not figure out how to be on good behavior for the visit and also to treat the person that would be making a report to the court on her behavior, etc. with manners at the very least. I know that she is an adult, but did her mother not teach her anything at all, or no perhaps she taught her to behave just this way. apple did not fall that far from the tree......

2472 days ago
81.

jamesnpost    

"If Britney commits suicide, the news will drop her??" Moron! We love it when our pop gods are shamed by their feet of clay, and destroy themselves, revealing that the money we wish we had did not make them better than us... we are still all a-twitter about Marilyn (even if her song did get crassly recycled), we are just getting started on Anna... christ, Plath is a celebrity only because she killed herself..

2472 days ago
82.

Gen    

Ok so who is filming the person filming Heidi? I am 47 and I could do a better video!! Who are these people anyway? I have never heard of Heidi Montag...
And as for Britney? Poor woman, after she had those kids her life fell apart...she should have stayed with Justin Timberlake, gone on with her bee-bop career, and she would still be making millions... what mistakes she has made...I feel sorry for her

2472 days ago
83.

Vernae    

Someone below me said Britney was a good singer...um, lip syncing does not make you a good singer, especially when it's done poorly as she has demonstrated in the past. You are as delusional as all the gsys who worship her.

I'll agree that she's not fat, but that doesn't mean she's not a slob. As far as I'm concerned her being rich and famous is a privledge, one that needs to be earned. She makes a gazillion more dollars than me a year and I would not be caught dead serving Ho-Ho's and fried chicken at my wedding.

Don't even get me started on the insanity of her walking barefoot in a gas station bathroom. MRSA anyone?

2472 days ago
84.

Herm    

I just wish that some how these 2 baby's need not to be with Brit or Kev,I think the judge should rethink giving these 2 babies to either one of the parents,they were not wanted to begin with by Brit ,and Kev just saw that he had more to gain by getting her knocked up.Its all about the money,I really think that the only reason he is not with his other baby's momma is that she probably didn't have enough cash flo coming in.So the only responsible adult in this circus is Brits mom.

2472 days ago
85.

Ashley    

Omg..I have to say that Heidi Montag is a complete PUPPET! hahahahaha
what a complete LOSER. She is sooo dumb and I wouldnt buy her cd if it was on sale for a PENNY!

2472 days ago
86.

greg    

Looking at the photo closely you will see that one hand is holding a cup while the other hand appears to be resting in her lap. Could it be that she was parked outside the coffee shop just relaxing and not driving at all at the time?

2472 days ago
87.

LMAO    

Brit reminds me of Marilyn Monroe

2472 days ago
88.

Frieda Jane    

To #63

Granted she did not want the coach but one would think that she would be smart enough to figure that she needed to be on best behavior with someone that would report on her to the courts. I guess that the woman did not kiss her butt for her and tell her how wonderful she is. Even a second grader can figure out how to answer questions to stay out of trouble at times. If her brain worked at all she would be able to figure it out. She has only one thought...a one word thought ME.

As far as the Paps. Well, has not anyone else figured out what I have, she lets them know where and when so they can get her pictures of her doing such silly things.

Also has anyone ever checked out what exactly is in that everlasting paper cup? I once knew a drunk that had scotch in his coffee mug.. Think about it..........

2472 days ago
89.

jamesnpost    

Topher, the "backwoods of Louisiana" includes some fine places populated with people who treat each other with a lot of respect and tolerance. Surprise to you. It's pretty clear to me that California is exactly where you belong.

2472 days ago
90.

Kathy    

Brittany probably had a good reason to ignore the woman...seems anything Brit said or did would have been made as public as the report that was meant for the court only. The courts frown upon such leaks. I would have kept silent also.Straighten up and fly right, Brit...your kids need you.

2472 days ago
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