Bonaduce Uses Penthouse to Redeem His Manhood

31. Everybody knows, and surely Danny must have figured it out BY NOW that steroid use causes not only that hideous face he sports (anybody seen Sly stallone lately? These two are what the Guillotine was invented for!!) but steroids ALSO cause the itty bitty peter pecker problem...just take a good close gander at those "hunks" in tight "not even there" tiny "suits" who do body building contests...you will see NOTHING where a bulge should be. Bulges of hideous dimensions, ready to burst from the skin and annihilate the earth are ALL OVER their body, but just TRY to find one where you might want one most...NADA!!

Poor Danny the ugly, drunkard goat, wondering why-oh-why his wife wasn't "happy" and never "wanted him"...

Hey c**kless wonder....
-no TOOL,
-you fool,
-no PLAY in wifey's pool!!

OR

Maybe if you knew how to use the STUB that you have left
after you have obliterated BOTH your heads with steroids
(AND VARIOUS AND SUNDRY OTHER MOOD ALTERERS TOO NUMEROUS TO MENTION)
she might have shown the SLIGHTEST bit of interest....

Forrest Gump could figure THIS one out:

"Selfish is as selfish does"

or

"Sex with Danny is like a box of chocolates...
a thin brittle shell on the outside...
and something sticky that leaks all over you
waaaay too soon (before you're ready)
on the inside..."

WHERE'S THE SPRAY & WASH????

Happy Pumping Danny....
oh, I don't mean SEXUALLY of course...THAT would be out of the question
given your "condition" and all...
I mean happy pumping from the steroid needle that gives you such an attractive
Goatface....BLAAAAATTTT BLAAAAATTTTTTT

Posted at 4:13PM on Nov 28th 2007 by A GOAT-HERDER!!

32. THAT'S A MEN'S MAGAZINE?!?!?
.
What kind of moron trying to prove his 'manhood' poses for other men?!?!
.
Is Playgirl not in publication anymore? It'll make the internet anyway, and that's what he wants, apparently.

Posted at 4:21PM on Nov 28th 2007 by JustSayin

33. I am gay..... but I still had to look away from that pic.

Posted at 4:24PM on Nov 28th 2007 by Anotherjohn

34. He only has nub.

Posted at 4:23PM on Nov 28th 2007 by P-Type

35. KRISTEN LUVS FELIX,

Go to perezhilton(dot)com to see his teeny weeny. ;-)

Posted at 4:26PM on Nov 28th 2007 by Dawn Day

36. Well, at least if he's going to go do down, he'll go down in flames.

Posted at 6:03PM on Nov 28th 2007 by Crying Game

37. I don't care what anyone one says. I wanna see it. I'm curious. I like red heads.

Posted at 7:27PM on Nov 28th 2007 by dogboy

38. I saw the picture of the "sparrow" on Perez a month ago. The ONLY thing that will help THAT mess of a man is a penis extention. Ladies, unless you want to HATE the male anatomy, DONT LOOK AT A NAKED BONADUCE.

Posted at 7:11PM on Nov 28th 2007 by Cindy

39. ugh. PUKE!

Posted at 4:51PM on Nov 28th 2007 by here&bored

40. ugh. PUKE!

Posted at 4:52PM on Nov 28th 2007 by here&bored

41. That boy is plum RETARDED!!!!

Posted at 4:49PM on Nov 28th 2007 by Billy

42. This lowlife butthole really needs to go crawl back under his rock. I didn't know they gave little girls pee pees!

Posted at 4:56PM on Nov 28th 2007 by Sir Nigel Buttercrumpett

43. It MUST be a shrinkage thing. That thang is a joke! Check out Perez Hilton's site if you want to see "it".

Posted at 5:24PM on Nov 28th 2007 by Notorious P.I.G.

44. i'm really sorry about that creating that guy, but trust me, the better parts ended up running down his mommy's leg. i'll be giving him a yeast infection later this week.

Posted at 5:25PM on Nov 28th 2007 by GOD

45. Red pubes are the ugliest!

Posted at 5:32PM on Nov 28th 2007 by Prince Romanoff