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Lorenzo to Shauna -- Miami, My Ass

Posted Apr 8th 2008 3:12PM by TMZ Staff

Lorenzo Lamas has heard about ex-wife Shauna Sand's comment to TMZ -- that she'll be hightailing it (pun intended) to Miami. Lorenzo says over his dead, chiseled body.
Lorenzo Lamas, Shauna Sand
Cary Goldstein, Lorenzo's divorce lawyer, tells TMZ he spoke with his client, who's in Sweden. Lorenzo's reaction to his baby mama saying that she hates L.A. and is going as close to Cuba as possible -- "I strongly oppose it."

Lorenzo feels he's the only "stable force" in the family and "the [three] kids need me." Goldstein tells us Shauna has not given any legal notice that she's moving and she just better not.

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16. HEY LOOK ! ANOTHER PLASTIC WOMAN IN HOLLYWERID !

Posted at 4:11PM on Apr 8th 2008 by hack attack

17. SHE LOOKS LIKE SHE HAS REAL WET FARTS

Posted at 4:03PM on Apr 8th 2008 by jimmyd

18. Is the chick on the bachelor her daughter too. They sure do look alike and she doesn't look like her dad

Posted at 5:04PM on Apr 8th 2008 by katinak

19. You chicks slamming her can only dream you looked as good as her. Hate comes from jealousy. She has a hot bod, and gorgeous face. You porkers slam her because it gives your low self-esteem a boost. Can't you find a more productive way to spend your time, than to come to a rag site, and abuse people you don't even know?

Posted at 4:09PM on Apr 8th 2008 by Mac

20. Could someone pop her lips before she floats off?

Posted at 4:12PM on Apr 8th 2008 by ha ha

21. Mac (#16) what classes are you taking? ILikeSocialDiseases 101 and FantasiesofTrailerTrash 101

I can tell you like "classy" broads.

Posted at 4:17PM on Apr 8th 2008 by me

22. Mac ~ First of all, I don't know who pissed in your cheerios this morning but obviously someoe did! As a woman, I would never for ANY amount of money want to look anything like this skank. I can't speak for the other women but, I would bet a years salary that they probably feel the same way! I don't hate this woman and could really care less who she is or what she does. So, don't put ALL women in the same class. My self esteem is just fine and totally in check! You might want to check on Shauna's self esteem though. Any woman that would have the amount of PLASTIC surgery that she has obviously has VERY LOW SELF ESTEEM!

Posted at 4:27PM on Apr 8th 2008 by Dallas

23. He is the only stable force in his kids' lives, and yet he is giving these quotes from SWEDEN? Uh...no. Both Lorenzo and his ex-wife are so shallow and clueless. Sorry. It's true.

Posted at 4:32PM on Apr 8th 2008 by lorenzoborenzo

24. NOSE JOB, EYE JOB, AND LIP JOB FROM WHAT I CAN SEE!!!

REALLY UNHAPPY PEOPLE, THEY JUST CAN'T STAND THE HAND THEY WERE DEALT!!!!

AGREED, PROBAAABLY CUTS MAJOR WET FARTS!!!!

Posted at 4:30PM on Apr 8th 2008 by NUMbnuts

25. Shauna is a gross ugly pig... Lorenzo should hook up with men... we'd treat him better.

Posted at 4:30PM on Apr 8th 2008 by BlueJayFlys

26. Well, if he is the stable force in the family for the kids, then why doesn't he have custody of them.

Posted at 4:30PM on Apr 8th 2008 by TCurry

27. good grief, the pix of them side by side look like a promo for the new Munsters '08 series.

Posted at 4:32PM on Apr 8th 2008 by cammyv

28. Dallas--- Hit a little too close to home, did I? LOL Try not to be so jealous. It is unbecoming, hon.

Posted at 4:43PM on Apr 8th 2008 by Mac

29. Mac, I am 5'10 132 lbs, got a hotter body and face then her, and i still think she is ugly. errrrrr, my eyebrows also match my hair.

Posted at 4:46PM on Apr 8th 2008 by me

30. She used to be someone else's "assistant" and she met Lorenzo on the set of his old show. They slept together immediately, he gave her control of his finances (true story believe it or not) and she began working as a sort of live-in whore/CPA. They got married (LOL), he called up Marilyn Grabowski at Playboy and asked that Shauna do a 'test photo shoot' for being a POTM (PLAYMATE OF THE MONTH). Obviously it was a done deal, given Playboy's preference for filling their magazine with celebrities or their spouses, she earned a little recognition on her own, he got jealous of this monster he created, all their humping created spawn, and that sealed her future finances with Lorenzo, via child support for life. He doesn't care about his kids, and neither does she. It continues to be a money tug-of-war, and trying to up one another by using the kids as pawns. Happens in everyday divorces, too, unfortunately. This fight just happens to make print in the tabloids. He's an aging 80's sex icon (EW) and she has nothing going for her and can't make life on her own, so she creates drama with the kids and the in-fighting, then spends whatever extra on her endless botox, lip injections and fill-er-up breast implantations. She's looking to get signed for a reality TV show, people. Would you watch? lmao

Posted at 4:58PM on Apr 8th 2008 by Andi

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