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Cook's Crappy Defense: Belushi's Ghost Owns Me

9/22/2008 3:50 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF

Dane Cook is dragging the ghosts of John Belushi and Steve Martin into a nasty legal battle over dog poop -– despite the fact that one of the comics isn't even dead yet!
Launch documents
After a judge ruled to evict Cook from his Hollywood apartment last month because nobody picked up after the comic's crap-happy dog, Dane has decided to fight the decision with one of the most bizarre legal arguments we've ever heard –- that Belushi and Martin's supernatural leftovers have a serious affect on his career.

Cook claims he only rented the apartment in the first place because his heroes, Belushi and Martin, used to live in the same complex back in the day, and according to the court docs filed in L.A. County Superior Court, he would suffer serious "mental and emotional" damage -- and his career would crumble -- if he was forced to leave. In the docs, Cook claims, "I know that the presence of those that have lived there before me affects me deeply and provides me with inspiration."

Cook went on to say, "In the same way that writers can get writer's block, comedians can really easily run out of ideas and 'stories'; I am extremely frightened that this will happen to me if I am forced to move out of my apartment. I've seen it happen to other comics, that something interferes with their connection to their creative muse, and it's destroyed careers."

In the three pages of desperate begging and pleading for the judge to hear his appeal, Cook also adds that he will cut a $40,000 check to the owner of the apartment ASAP to cover all of the suffering that his dookie-droppin' doggie has caused, if he is allowed to stay.

No word if Cook channeled Belushi to pen this appeal -– but it did smell suspiciously like a bottle of Jack Daniels.

38 COMMENTS

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31.

MindyD    

Just another effed up comedian

2187 days ago
32.

Ms_Tell_It_Like_It_Is    

Stupid case, stupid excuse, stupid man.............NEXT

2187 days ago
33.

Tom Cruise has landed    

He sold his soul to the devil. There just isn't any other way to explain it. He sucks at everything in life. He better save his pennies. He's gonna need it. The clock it ticking Dane. Say Hello to Pauly Shore on your way down to Carrot Top Zone.

2187 days ago
34.

Bethany    

The only problem with Dane's defense is that he claims to be a "comic". Doesn't one have to be funny to own this title???

2187 days ago
35.

Rollin Times    

Dane is not funny, but his lawyers are. Just goes to show what money can buy, didn't this guy get kicked out of his apartment months ago?

2186 days ago
36.

scissors    

This afternoon I took a poll of 10 ordinary citizens. The question I asked was: "Do you think Dane Cook is funny?"

2 people said yes
1 person said no
7 people didn't know who Dane Cook was

P.S. He got evicted for allowing his dog crap all over his apartment building, hahahaha

2186 days ago
37.

steve    

Only in LA, does stuff like this happan !!! He is probley sniffing some old drugs belonging to Belushi !!!

2186 days ago
38.

DeepFreeze3    

Why is this guy wasting everybody's time with this crap? He has a new house:

http://www.tmz.com/2008/09/05/dane-cook-apartment-living-is-crap/

Move on, dude! It's over! GET A LIFE!!!

2186 days ago
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