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12/30/2008 2:45 AM PST BY TMZ STAFF

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1.

Hawkeye    

She's probably not going to get an employees discount on that sectional she had her eye on...

2041 days ago
2.

R.J. Johnson    

I've talked to this guy on the phone. He's pretty tightly wrapped.

2041 days ago
3.

Kadchen    

Did you notice last week when Daniel Craig was not so.. let's just say hospitable to the camerman, that
the hotel and or office building was on the 700 block? Maybe he would have been less cranky if it was the reverse "007
block".

2041 days ago
4.

Wayne Newtn    

the sun is out and overhead...we wake with skin still quivering from the night's delight...but, we must take note of our day's dilemna...how to forge on?...while thoughts of past ecstasy remain vivid within our being...we rise, we shower, we dress...all the while, the tingle remains...in those secret parts, that dare we reveal...can we suppress that which we desire?...a desire so strong that we see in everyone, a chance to act on that desire...friend or stranger, acquaintance or unknown...we look at all, believing that they can unleash that we have come to expect...yearn...hide....defuse...ignore, no more....the want is too strong...the quest reborn, find that, the feeling that warms the innermost within ourselves...can we hold on 'til the search is no more?...find the strength, find the fortitude...that will be rewarded at searches end...when night falls, the prize will be found...return to your comfort, retreat to your den of delight...be pleased that you will receive that which you have searched for...ssshhh...ssshhh...go now...go now and claim your prize...reward yourself with the zealous fervor, that cannot be descirbed...go now..go now,,.feel the pleasures, you have waited for since you felt it's all-encompassing power...muscles twitch...body writhing...mind racing....racing to the climax of all you have wanted...go now...go on....

2041 days ago
5.

Wayne Newtn    

one and all,

i must resurrect my hypothesis that of which i am most known: 'Bling Splatt the Cause of Pre-Mature Death among Rappers'.

As submitted to the New England Journal of Health, the American Medical Association, National Geographic, Reader's Digest, and Redbook.

My postulate that the root cause of death among rappers is not due to black on black crime, per se. But, due to the inordinate use of metals within the framework of their upper torso, in the region of what is known on the street as 'da grill'. Commonly used metals such as silver, gold, platinum, and an occasional diamond or two (dependent upon the rappers ability to sell their wares - ie records - ) as placed in the oral cavity of said rapper, causes reactions such that mortality rates are a foregone conclusion. There is no cure for 'Bling Splatt", the diagnosis is death.

What causes 'Bling Splatt'? There is no simple answer. My theory revolves about the idea that low IO levels of said rappers combined with calcuim and phosphorous (previously stated in street slang as 'da grill') when mixed with metals and/or metallic objects react such that positively charged electrons are emitted which when released within the parietal lobe send such a large electrical pulse throughout the parietal region of the brain, that the organ cannot absorb...in essence...KABOOM !!!...the brain has exploded...ie "Brain Splatt".

Collegues at the Bellevue Mental Hospital, Def Jam Records Inc., Johns Hopkins Medical University, and Toys 'R Us are in concert with my hypothesis, theories, and ideas. They are all in agreement that more study and review is needed in this arena of medicine. I have applied for a $500 Billion bailout for study and research and a few luxury amenities for myself (Mustang Ranch, Nevada trips for me and the staff, and dubs for my Prius). President-elect Obama has been apprised of this situation and receives daily updates as to which rapper is next believed to contract the illness as such. The Central Intelligence Agency (CIA), the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI), the Secret Service, MI6, Scotland Yard, and Elmer Fudd are conducting intelligence quotient (IO) tests on secretly on unsuspecting rappers, as we speak, in order to compile and update their existing files of low intelligence rappers.

Such a twist of fate that belies our 'mos def freestylin' word-slangin' prophets. That there by the grace of God, he shall speak. But, there by the grace of God, when he speaks with mouths full of 'bling', his head will go BOOM !!!

My services are rendered to expose the truth regards the death of our nations rappers. Word !!!

einStinE

2041 days ago
6.

R.J. Johnson    

Wow, talk about long-winded!

2041 days ago
7.

Wayne Newtn    

RJ Johnson must have bought a bed with "bed bugs" from Leeds !!! coz' those bugs must be biting at his crotch !!! get some 'crabs b gone' from the pharmacy, will ya RJ !!!

2041 days ago
8.

R.J. Johnson    

#8 Well, THAT was articulate!

2041 days ago
9.

rachelle    

Okay, time to confess. I'm RJ Johnson and I'm a patient at Bellevue Mental Hospital in New York. With the help of another patient (he thinks he's David Letterman) I have been sneaking into the combuter room to send my messages. Got to go now, it's time to basket weave

2041 days ago
10.

Mary    

Geez, I always thought Neil with the Deal was Gay -- I mean, LOOK at that idiotic cartoon drawing of him on all his ads! Those lips! My balloon is burst by the sharp prick of reality... "I won't be beat!" he'll probably broadcast from in front of the courthouse now.

2041 days ago
11.

billyboyhere    

Its confirmed----Letterman is the ugliest man in show business. Dave, please, continue to stay out of the spotlight when you arent wearing make up, your hair piece and your suit with white sox----you are a freakoid that belongs in a carnival side show with that face, only I wouldnt pay the 50 cents entry fee.

Ug as in Lee

Now Top Ten Me

2041 days ago
12.

Tangie    

This kind of crap has been happening to me and millions of women since we were 15...you mean to tell me we could have been getting money for it??!! Stupid me, I just thought getting flirted with and asked out was a part of the men and women thing...my bad!

2041 days ago
13.

R.J. Johnson    

I sure got YOUR attention.

2041 days ago
14.

rachelle    

RJ Johnson - Let me help you dear boy, you are a bored nobody

2041 days ago
15.

phatnorm    

hey,where can i get a good candy bar this time at night?

2041 days ago
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