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R. Kelly -- Free to Pee on Whomever

1/9/2009 2:13 AM PST BY TMZ STAFF

Fathers, lock up your daughters: R. Kelly is now officially a free man.

His lawyers announced yesterday Kells and his wife of 11 years, Andrea Lee, have split for good, and among other things, will share custody of their three kids. The couple filed for the big D in 2006, and Andrea had filed an emergency protective order back in 2005 against R., which she ultimately pulled.

Kelly was acquitted of child porn charges last summer.

12 COMMENTS

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1.

Kay    

I hope his wife gets custody of those earrings.

2121 days ago
2.

Lenn K.    

Maybe it's me, but I've never understood the earring thing with men. Besides it's such a selfish thing to wear earring that cost more than some people's house, and you wonder why people get robbed. Another celeb who got away with a crime, money and fame is the underlining thing.

2121 days ago
3.

MyDivaBeatsYours    

The wife was just the cover. I've never seen him out with her at all. He still gets teen booty, I bet.

2121 days ago
4.

Lord Xenu    

R. Kelly on sex with teens:

Asked by Black Entertainment Television (BET) if he had a weakness for teenage girls, he replied: “When you say teenage, how old do you mean?

2121 days ago
5.

yummi26 - old school forever!!!    

He's married? With children? Who'd of thunk it?

2121 days ago
6.

Jive    

I wanna p*ss on you...drip drip drip!!

2121 days ago
7.

What!!    

Deemer, actually I wouldn't waste my time feeling anything for him. Why would you think EVERY black person would be embarrassed with the way he lives his life? Because he's the same race as I am? No.....I’m not embarrassed because I know (as you should) that he doesn't speak for me or any other black person. His actions only reflect him….only him.

2121 days ago
8.

ozzman    

MAJOR jackass...

2121 days ago
9.

munch    

Good, now he is free to be with me

2121 days ago
10.

Bethany Sweet    

This fool will get his stupid self back in jail b4 long. Just wait.

2121 days ago
11.

Mags    

An other great R Kelly quote about the underage sex allegations: "They can criticise you without even knowing you, and hate you when they don't even know you. All of a sudden, you're, like, the Bin Laden of America. Osama bin Laden is the only one who knows exactly what I'm going through,"

2121 days ago
12.

oops    

From the pages of the New England Journal of Health, December 2008,
Vol XXICCMM, Issue VIII, (copyrighted einStinE):


one and all,

i must resurrect my hypothesis that of which i am most known: 'Bling
Splatt the Cause of Pre-Mature Death among Rappers'.

As submitted
to the New England Journal of Health, the American
Medical Association, National Geographic, Reader's Digest, and
Redbook.

My postulate that the root cause of death among rappers is not due to
black on black crime, per se. But, due to the inordinate use of
metals
within the framework of their upper torso, in the region of what is
known on the street as 'da grill'. Commonly used metals such as
silver, gold, platinum, and an occasional diamond or two (dependent
upon the rappers ability to sell their wares - ie records - ) as
placed in the oral cavity of said rapper, causes reactions such that
mortality rates are a foregone conclusion. There is no cure for
'Bling Splatt", the diagnosis is death.

What causes 'Bling Splatt'? There is no simple answer. My theory
revolves about the idea that low IO levels of said rappers combined
with calcuim and phosphorous (previously stated in street slang as
'da grill')
when mixed with metals and/or metallic objects react such
that positively charged electrons are emitted which when released
within the parietal lobe send such a large electrical pulse
throughout the parietal region of the brain, that the organ cannot
absorb...in essence...KABOOM !!!...the brain has exploded...ie "Brain
Splatt".

Collegues at the Bellevue Mental Hospital, Def Jam Records Inc.,
Johns Hopkins Medical University, and Toys 'R Us are in concert with
my hypothesis, theories, and ideas. They are all in agreement that
more study and review is needed in this arena of medicine. I have
applied for a $500 Billion bailout for study and research and a few
luxury amenities for myself (Mustang Ranch, Nevada trips for me and
the staff, and dubs for my Prius). President-elect Obama has been
apprised of this situation and receives daily updates as to which
rapper is next believed to contract the illness as such.
The Central
Intelligence Agency (CIA), the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI),
the Secret Service, MI6, Scotland Yard, and Elmer Fudd are conducting
intelligence quotient (IO) tests on secretly on unsuspecting rappers,
as we speak, in order to compile and update their existing files of
low intelligence rappers.

Such a twist of fate that belies our 'mos def freestylin'
word-slangin' prophets. That there by the grace of God, he shall
speak. But, there by the grace of God, when he speaks with mouths
full of 'bling', his head will go BOOM !!!

My services are rendered to expose the truth regards the death of our
nations rappers. Word !!!

einStinE



(As reprinted by waYneNuton, with permission from his supremacy
einStinE)

2121 days ago

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