Creative Drunk Gets DUI on Motorized Bar Stool

Warning: It's best to cue the song "Dueling Banjos" before reading the following story:

Some MacGyver-esque drunkard in Ohio is facing DUI charges after crashing a bar stool he was driving -- HE WAS DRIVING!

motorized bar stool

Cops arrived to the scene around 5:41 PM on March 4, arrested the guy, and filed a police report ... here are the highlights ... it's classic.

"Unit #1 was heading west bound on Kelly Lane. Unit #1 attempted to turn around (180 degrees), and back down Kelly east bound. As Unit #1 began its turn, it rolled over and the operator was injured."

"Note: Unit #1 was a home made [sic] motor vehicle, a bar stool attached to a frame with a lawn mower attached."

"At this point I noticed that Mr. Wygle's eye's [SIC] were very blood shot and were glassy in appearance."

"I asked him what happened, Mr. Wygle stated, 'I wrecked my bar stool.'"

"I asked Mr. Wygle how much alcohol he had to drink, he said, 'a lot.'"


"I asked if the bar stool even ran and said, 'yes, it will go around 38 miles per hour.'"

Wygle, who has undoubtedly become a cult hero in frat houses across the country, pleaded not guilty and has requested a jury trial.

No word on how he plans on getting to court.

Tags: barstool, drunk, Ohio

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(Page 3 of 6) Previous 15 Comments | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Most Recent | Next 15 Comments

31. That is the Ferrari Enzo of motorized bar stools! A 5 horsepower motorcycle engine hooked up to a chain-drive, yielding a top speed of 38 mph!! Think of it; home to Hooters in no time flat.

Posted at 12:11PM on Mar 31st 2009 by Jimmie-Jimmie Johnson

32. LMFAO #7...that comment was toooo f*ckin funny!!!

Posted at 12:13PM on Mar 31st 2009 by #7 is right

33. OhhEhmGhe! I totaly want one of these things! LMAO! Very creative for a drunkie. ahahah. The story is hillarous! Go drunk people gooo! **vroom vroom crash!** AHAHAHA

Posted at 12:35PM on Mar 31st 2009 by Brandi

34. My favorite part is the little wheelie bar on the back

Posted at 12:34PM on Mar 31st 2009 by Erik with a k

35. No wonder GM is going bankrupt- Look at their 2010 line of vehicles.

Posted at 12:37PM on Mar 31st 2009 by the leader

36. I want one!!! I can get to the bar and have a place to sit!!! I do prefer my barstools have backs on them. This there is a deluxe model?

Posted at 12:40PM on Mar 31st 2009 by whynot

37. (My apologies to Jeff Foxworthy.) You might be a redneck if...you get a DUI for driving your souped-up furniture.

Posted at 12:43PM on Mar 31st 2009 by Made my day

38. I heard he got his couch up to 80 on the interstate.

Posted at 12:44PM on Mar 31st 2009 by FL Girl

39. The world would be a much better place if there were more news like this every day....

Posted at 12:49PM on Mar 31st 2009 by CaptainKendrick

40. As dumb as this guy is, he is still smarter than most of the posters on this story.

Posted at 1:01PM on Mar 31st 2009 by Jossip

41. And people say us Americans have lost our ingenuity and drive! That looks like both to me, in spades!

Posted at 1:17PM on Mar 31st 2009 by lost in lalaland

42.
#32......

Hahahahahaha ( great post).....yes...but it will cost more. I bet you can get one with a boombox ( circa 1980 ) bungee corded to the front. And for that they will throw in some fuzzy dice.

Posted at 1:19PM on Mar 31st 2009 by Ankaret

43. Most of the stuff I read on here is pretty mundane, but this is funny as hell. LMAO.

Posted at 2:46PM on Mar 31st 2009 by Col

44. I bet this will be on Ebay very soon....

Posted at 1:28PM on Mar 31st 2009 by HAHAHAHAHa

45. Republican answer to the lower the BAR on the economy. Thanks Bushit!

Posted at 1:36PM on Mar 31st 2009 by beatupfromfeetup

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