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Candy to Tori:

Get Real, Baby

7/27/2009 1:15 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF

Candy & Tori SpellingCandy Spelling -- the mother famously at war with her daughter -- has taken the bold step of communicating with Tori Spelling through TMZ ... and her opening line isn't gonna get her a lot of invites. Here's the open letter in all its glory:


I Know many middle-aged people have issues about their parents and their upbringing. I did. My memories didn't match all those of my mother, and, funny thing, it's the same way with my daughter.

Life has consequences. What you say is on the record. Other people have feelings.

I have a vested interest in this subject. My daughter, Tori's, two-part season finale revolves around my granddaughter's first birthday party and how she has made what seems like an agonizing decision to invite me.

Cue music. Cue sideways glances. Cue Lights.

I did get an invitation just in time for the RSVP deadline. I'm sure its delivery will be on next week's episode with some comment about my house or driveway or street or something they won't like. I wonder if that will be spread out over one part or two. Sigh.

A big party wasn't how I envisioned meeting my granddaughter for the first time; but, hey, this is Hollywood, and my grandchildren have become reality show props, too. At the time I emailed "yes," I didn't realize I was being set up for a two-parter, even though it was clear I was being invited to be part of a segment for my daughter's reality show.

Spoiler alert. Don't read this if you plan to sit through an hour of people looking at their watches and saying "she's late." I decided my first meeting with my granddaughter should be on home video, not primetime cable; so I emailed that I would not be attending.

Back to other reality stars. My husband taught me that the plots have to be fresh and updated. The same old whining gets tired after a while. Enough complaining about what may or may not have happened during first grade or YMCA camp, or what vegetable you were forced to endure, especially when you are privileged enough to be on TV and get paid for it.

For all the reality show personalities, please remember that real life doesn't get edited to make things better or worse or get better ratings. You're responsible for what you do. Life isn't just a show. And your families can't just be props. Make your own season finale without creating conflicts you will regret later.

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Ha THE TEACHER was taught a lesson    

Sue her Tori and get a restraining order on her. She's whack!

She's the kind of Candy that ROTS your teeth! And it is not because she is sweet. Reading her letter made my own teeth hurt.

1882 days ago

Linda Mott    

My mother was a beater and a yeller. I was in the hospital with ulcers at seven years old, But the past is the past and if you don't forgive your mother and move on, you become bitter. To use her mother for ratings is horrible. I think, no matter what she thinks about her mother, she must grow up and forgive her. Life is too short to hold a grudge. You must be 100% correct and Tori is not. What would Tori do if her children grew up and did the same thing to her?

1882 days ago


Candy, focus on your nice and absolutely gorgeous son and don’t spend your life pondering over things that make you feel bad and that is out of your hands. When it’s about adults, it takes two to get along.

1882 days ago


I'm guessing this move will garner her more of the same: stone silence. It didn't work for Jon Voight, and it won't work for Candy Spelling. Face it. If you really want a relationship, why not get a referral from your LIFE COACH SON for one of his peers? Oh, they might give you the bad news that it AIN'T HAPPENING.

1882 days ago


My mom and I had a similar relationship (strained). She died Feb. 2005. Whatever I wanted to say to her, I can't do it anymore.... So, please Candy and Tori, bury the hatchet and see each other... Neither of you knows what tomorrow brings. I love Tori and Dean's show and those children have got to be 2 of the most precious children I have ever seen. I don't have grandchildren yet, but I want to be able to see them and give them love and attention when they are here... And Tori is NOTmiddle aged. Middle aged is like in someone's 50's... You owe Tori an apology for that one, Candy....

1882 days ago


I dont think Candy love her daughter, she is always saying something negative about her in public, and whats this about an open letting to a celebrity news network, isnt candy doing the same thing she is blaming her daughter for? Candy should at least make sure her daughter tori get some millions of dollars from her late father instead of being jealous of tori and trying to act like a jealous sister, act like a mother. The father left millions or billions of dollars when he died, how come tori only got 500,000 thats nothing compared to the lifestyle Tori grew up in. I think candy is a jealous mother.

1882 days ago


If Candie wants to see her grandchildren, then stop being a beeyotch and call Tori and say she wants to come over to see them. And be the bigger person and go when Tori says she can come not hagle about a time.

1882 days ago

From a mother and daughter    

Dear Candy, Your granddaughter is already one. How much you've missed. Way to stick to your guns and drag it out longer. She'll enjoy meeting you much more when she's seven.

Enough already. Tori is paying her bills and raising her kids under the parameters you left her to work with. Start supporting your daughter emotionally and financially before you permanently sully the Spelling name. Those reality shows can do wonderful things with lighting, and you'll look better on camera than absent from it. Go hug your daughter and kiss some babies before they're tweens.

1882 days ago


That ought to work. Better try love. See

1882 days ago


lots of issues here..Liam looks just like Tori's dad... not sure about Stella. Dean is coaching Tori to not meet up with her mom. Tori continues to get thinner and thinner.. and wants another baby. She truly looks anorexic now, have never seen her this thin. Dean and Tori have all the money they need.. this shouldn't be about money at this point. lol.. Dean gets bit parts in movies shot in Canada and all those two do is piss and moan that they miss each other. Wow, how many of us can get on planes and see our spouses at work and then fly to Florida to pimp out our jewelry line? Tori is living off the Spelling name. You are going to have to keep milking that one.. cause that's about all you have. Dean needs a real job.. and also needs tgo remember that he left his spouse for Tori. Tori was married as well. I do think Tori's loyal male friends are very cool. Yes, they are your family. Your mom is not going to change. You will have to leave it alone. Get some religion in your life and put that crap on the back burner... Raise your children proudly. You tried 2x... your mom will not change.

1882 days ago


Candy Spelling = Narcissist. Plain and simple. Check out

1882 days ago


Candy is using money as a weapon against Tori. You can't take it with you b**ch. In the mean time you are missing the best years of your grandkids life. She's sitting up there in that hundred million dollar mansion by herself watching her grandkids on TV.and not being able to hug them because she is a stubborn hefer. Put aside your ego besides you are nobody without Aaron Spelling anyway. You have to pay to get any attention from anybody.

1882 days ago

Greedy Lawyers Suck    

This is an AGE OLD PROBLEMS.......Mother/Daughter......Daughter/Mother......Trillions of Books written.......Intense therapy
for trillions of daughters/mother.......

But I am a mother/daughter too.......I did see the show where Tori said: " I'll put out an olive branch and of course being a
mother myself.....I don't want my relationship with any adult child to be aired all over the world......

Tori...... I have adult children who now blame me for not having a relationship with their grandmother...... You are using your children as bate to dangle in front of your mother.......PLease fess up to it! It's the oldest trick we women play..... We use our kids to get even with Mother....Grandmother........our Ex's......

BUT our children grow up and they too know us....... Our weaknesses, our strengths, our manipulations........

Before its too late......... Have lunch with your mother..........don't ask permission from hubby......hubby should stay out of your relationship with mother.........

Mother............ you too extend an olive branch........... don't let pride get in the way of your relationships with children and grandchildren.............

that's what i think........

1882 days ago


At least Tori is trying to work, not live off the estate of her dead husband. Figured it was a 50/50 blame thing until Candy publicly said Tori caused her father's death. Don't think there could be any more hurtful words that coud be said. Candy now just wants her "15" minutes of fame again and is getting it through her daughter.
If I were Tori, I would just ignore the woman, be the bigger more mature of the two, let her rot in her mansion and ensure your children are never exposed to that witch again. Protect you children from her, do you own thing and be happy!
When Candy is on her death bed with no one except her son whose standing there waiting for the check book to be sgned over to him, she'll realize she had a chance to make things right or be the one who was "right" and unfortunately she choose the later.

1882 days ago

Lauren G    

You know what, Tori has to have a reality show to set the record straight. If it wasn't for her reality show I would probably not like her, but because of it I am a huge fan now. Maybe if Candy didn't hoard all of her dead husbands billions of dollars Tori wouldn't have to even have a reality show to make ends meet.

What's ironic, is Candy is going on and on about how she wished she could meet her granddaughter behind private doors, but here SHE is writing yet ANOTHER "open" letter to Tori through the MEDIA!

Woman needs to be put on meds. Pronto.

1882 days ago
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