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Anne Heche -- We Need a Parenting Referee

9/16/2009 2:15 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF

It's possibly the worst job in the world -- some poor woman has been ordered to get in the middle of the nasty war between Anne Heche and her ex-husband Coleman Laffoon ... to teach them how to parent.

Anne Heche -- We Need a Parenting Referee

After Heche famously blasted her "lazy ass" ex on Letterman, the former couple agreed to get a "parenting plan coordinator" -- a highly paid court-ordered chaperone -- who will help them play nice for the sake of their son, Homer.

The coordinator will make $375 per-hour to do the following things:

-- Coach the parents on effective co-parenting
-- Help the parents make joint parenting decisions
-- Resolve disputes between the parents concerning the court-ordered parenting plan

Both Anne and Coley signed off on the deal -- which will remain in effect until May 1, 2011.

Good luck, parenting lady.

44 COMMENTS

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16.

snickers    

Wicked witch. Should be a health warning for men pinned to her clothing. Stay away.

1674 days ago
17.

Bobertbobert    

A.H.: reap the whirlwind. Busting into the media spotlight by pretending to be a Lesbian with Ellen D., she changed horses for whatever reason, possibly to jump-start her acting career; now having made herself notorious to celebrity fans, she got burned in the matrimonial sweepstakes and is now the newest fad: a Lesbian turned heterosexual butching over her lousy choices and the money she has to pay her laughing choice. Can an opportunist actually get the reward she has generated for herself? ASK Ellen!

1674 days ago
18.

Joanne    

I would pray that Anne and Mr. Laffoon will put their differences towards each other aside, for the sake of the child. I grew up with my mom and grandparents talking against my dad and my dad talking against my mom. It is a horrible way to grow up...

1674 days ago
19.

duh    

i could bitch slap the both of them for an $375/hour just for putting their child through this. heck you would not even have to pay me i may pay the courts for the privilege.

1674 days ago
20.

rhbjorn    

Here is parenting advice. Snap out of it. OK where is my money

1674 days ago
21.

Miranda    

aNNE hECHE IS A LOW LIFE SKANK WHO USES EVERY HUMAN BEING SHE COMES IN CONTACT WITH FOR HER OWN OERSONAL GAIN. FIRST IT WAS ELLEN DEGENEROUS, WHEN SHE PRETENDED TO BE A LESBIAN JUST TO CATIPULT HER DYING CAREER..THEN HER BOYFRIENDS WHO SHE CHEATED ON CONSTANTLY WHEN SOMEONE "BETTER": WOUDL COME ALONG...THEN HER POOR HUSBAND WHO NEVER STOOD A CHANCE UP AGAINST SUCH AN EVIL PERSON. SHE IS A USER AND A WITCH. WHAT GOES AROUND COMES AROUND ANNE AND KEEP TREATING HUMAN BEINGS THE WAY YOU DO AND ONE DAY IT WILL COME BACK AND BITE YOU IN YOUR UGLY - - - .

1674 days ago
22.

Deborah    

Social workers are the biggest scam going. $375 an hour for some advice your granny can tell you: "grow up and put your children first".

1674 days ago
23.

becky    

OMG save yourself $375 an hour and just grow up and act like adults. Really it is not that hard to respect each other. So you don't love each other anymore.... get over it! Think about what is right for your child.

1674 days ago
24.

Still in Shock    

This is what happens when people who should not have children - have children.

They are too selfish and think it is all about THEM!!!

IT'S NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

JUST BECAUSE FEMALES HAVE THE PLUMBING AND FEEL THE NEED TO REPRODUCE, DOESN'T MEAN THEY WOULD ALL BE GREAT PARENTS!!!!

THINK ABOUT WHAT YOUR KIDS WOULD GO THROUGH FIRST BEFORE BRINGING THEM INTO YOUR DRAMA FILLED LIFE.

GET YOUR HEAD STRAIGHT BEFORE YOU START HAVING KIDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

1674 days ago
25.

Cynthia J.    

Ms. Heche should have picked a better mate than Mr. Baffoon. It's clear he is just living off the child-support for their child. Then, again, Ms. Heche has made many unwise choices in her personal life (like being from another Planet). Her bizarre antics with Ellen Degenerous practically ruined Ellen's career. Then Heche hooked up with loser Laffoon. Then she dumped that loser and hooked up with a married man and father. You're a real winner, girlfriend.

1674 days ago
26.

homie1kanobe    

Here let me fix this real quick, In a family relationship there needs 1 mother and 1 father.Not 2 fathers, so Ann take off the coveralls and put on a dress,Promlem solved..Your welcome

1674 days ago
27.

oprah    

Calling SUPERNANNY here!!!!

1674 days ago
28.

Bonnie    

Yep. The business of government is Government folks. As such, judges welcome the opportunity to order a variety of dubious, "services." It's all for the corporate, greater good. See www.FamilyLawCourts.com

Good luck to all, let the cash register chimes begin!

1674 days ago
29.

nicaw    

My position is if you are the person in the wrong, you shouldn't talk.

Anne Heche cheated on her husband with her Men in Trees co-star. Shouldn't he be angry? Granted, we don't know what happened before she started doing the nasty with Tupper but she was still married.

Now what Coley should remember is that they (he and Anne) started their thing when she was still with Ellen. So Anne cheated on Ellen with him and she then cheated on him with James Tupper.

Parenting classes couldn't hurt, for sure. But she could use some extra help on the side.

1674 days ago
30.

stank    

They need a PC as do all couples divorcing with children!!! The child should NEVER be put in the middle of a bitter divorce and should never have to hear either parent criticizing the other. Despite how the parents feel toward each other the child loves both parents. Love doesn't force you to choose between one parent or the other and that sounds like what is happening hear.

1674 days ago
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