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Gloria Allred -- I'm Going After That Jerkoff Guy!

8/18/2010 1:25 PM PDT BY TMZ STAFF

The woman who claims a male co-worker secretly and dishonorably discharged himself into her bottle of water ... which she then unknowingly drank ... could be on her way to a serious money shot -- because TMZ has learned she's officially hired Gloria Allred.

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As we previously reported, cops in Orange County, California arrested the 31-year-old suspect yesterday after a DNA test allegedly connected the man to the gunk in the water bottle.

No word on when the first press conference is set to go down ... but you better believe we'll be there.


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59 COMMENTS

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16.

Shuffle Demon    

Imagine that Gloria Alred involved in something that got it the media, what are the chances??? Come on people we all know gloria isn't a ambulance chaser, she has no time for that, she is very very busy chasing the t.v. station camera vans down. I am suprised when she see's a reporter on the street with a camera man doing a story on something that she isn't diving thru the shot just to get her face on the news. I think Gloria likes more to see her face on the news than she worries about her clients fates...

1494 days ago
17.

Tellthetruth59    

PR Wire: This is to inform you that Gloria Allred has officially renamed her law firm Jizz Justice.

Ms. Allred felt the firm's former name "Sluts 'R Us - You screw 'em we'll sue 'em" was not all encompassing enough. If you have been the victim of a sperm crime please contact Mr. Allred at 1-800-Jackoff.

1494 days ago
18.

UrsusRexx2    

...Sweet Little Spermy's, 'lost at sea', in bottled water?
Gee, I hope the Right To Lifers can put their pocket howitzers down long enough to step in & protect this (overly hydrated)
'Human Life'!
Sexual acting out against someone who had no 'say' in the matter, by someone who didn't have any soicial / legal / moral basis for his tastless behaviore?
(Well, I guess the olde 'salty & frothy' isn't completly taste-free, but...I digress!)...
Gee...
Didn't I read, fairly recently, that Old Joe Ratz, at the Vatican heard about this story & offered to:
A.) Quadruple their weekly bottle water order, and...
B.) Contacted the district attorney's office, offering to 'take this offender off the DAs hands' by exporting him to Vatican City, like they did for Cardinal Law after his 'Good Show' in Boston??

1494 days ago
19.

Vogue    

Looks like water would show something other than water was floating around in there.

I always guard my drinking vessel! Too many nuts out there.

1494 days ago
20.

kromen    

Has she ever been to trial? I only see her in front of the camera, talking about what she's gonna do. Does she even know where the courthouse is?

1494 days ago
21.

Justice    

Maybe the guy was too shy to ask the girl if she swallowed or not.
That question has now been answered.

1494 days ago
22.

Jenny    

TMZ please put a photo of this person online, we really need to know who to look out for.

1494 days ago
23.

bob    

Yep. Shes gonna sue.

Gloria is going to get her client some Jack from that Jizz.

1494 days ago
24.

samantha     

am i the only one that wonders why it made her sick?

1494 days ago
25.

The Judge    

If you are a woman, and you wish to file a ridiculous or frivolous lawsuit under the pretense of female empowerment. If you are someone's mistress and would like a few more dollars in your pocket. If you have little or no value system whatsoever, Gloria Allred is your man...

1494 days ago
26.

Ambulance Chaser hater    

OK, my stomach turns as for what the ladies had to drink... that alone is grounds for the guy to be put away for 20yrs.

BUT!! Glory Allred is an Ambulance Chasing WHORE!! every f**king time there is someone in the news she has to run and try and represent them! Someone needs to pull her lawyer license... get a live woman, we are sick of your stunts.. anyway aren't you suppose to be on a 30 day self imposed NON-EATING stunt for the news anyway???

1494 days ago
27.

Erica    

When you drink water from a bottle, make sure it is sealed first. Keep it beside you until you're through drinking it. Duh. I'm beginning to believe this country is filled with criminally insane people. Just one big open-air asylum....

1494 days ago
28.

autumnk    

Gloria Allred needs to change her name to Gloria Sees Allgreen.
she is an media loving attention whore who cannot resist attaching her name and ego to anything that has even the most remote of chances of making her a quick buck. Whats worth the gold digging greedy attention whores she represents in 99% of her cases are just as guilty as the person they are suing.
serious how can anyone sue anyone they had an affair with just cuz it blew up in the media umm it takes two to have the affair there both equally friggin guilty.
Gloria seriously needs to be disbarred and locked away she is an expert on extortion and at last check extortion was a federal offense.
i can only hope the day comes someone sues gloria and bankrupts the twit.

1494 days ago
29.

REALbarbwire7    

This is the FIRST and ONLY time I would have hired this biotch myself!

1494 days ago
30.

snodgrass    

Gloria fondling...er...I mean handling the evidence will be the closest she has come to sperm in DECADES.

1494 days ago
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