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Charlie Sheen SINGLE

Officially Goddess-less

6/27/2011 4:30 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF

Charlie Sheen is finally UNCHAINED -- because TMZ has learned, the Warlock's last remaining goddess just gave him the chop.

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Sources close to Charlie tell TMZ, Natalie Kenly moved out last week -- but hell hath no fury like a Warlock scorned ... because we're told, the actor DEMANDED she return the Mercedes he bought her.

According to sources close to the actor, Charlie brushed off the break-up, claiming it's "not a common thing for the Masheen!"

We're told Charlie's penis celebrated the split by declaring war on the entire world, conquering three women from three different countries -- Mexico, Australia, and Colombia -- the very night Kenly walked out.

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145 COMMENTS

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16.

kitnplayn    

Too bad, Natalie, you are branded. Everyone in the world knows you are a gold-digging whore. Someday, you might have children, and they will know that you were a gold-digging whore. Actually, when you take money or gifts for sex, the true word is prostitute. Nothing special about offering up your genitals for money, any halfwit can do it.

1214 days ago
17.

The Hunger    

'We're told Charlie's penis celebrated the split by declaring war on the entire world, conquering three women from three different countries -- Mexico, Australia, and Colombia.

Conquering women/ hooking up with someone from different countries = FLAGGING. Charlie Sheen got three different flags in one night, that's almost impossible for mere mortals unless your name is Charlie Sheen! His penis probably has a passport.
More about flagging at: www.flaggingheadquarters.com

1214 days ago
18.

lala    

If this is winning, I'll stick to be a fking loser, thanks. I like how he made fun of Chuck Lorre’s' birth name being Jewish- a crackhead with a name like Carlos Estevez should NOT talk.

1214 days ago
19.

Jake    

Poor Natty, no career to fallback on, no money, no prospects, and not even a car. Her only possible asset might be a paid tell-all interview but she can ask Kacey Jordan how long those sorts of offers last. Bree Olson might be the only person who is going to come out of this mess ahead of the game. Getting out when she did she enhanced her opportunities and increased her rates without having to go the tell-all route.

1214 days ago
20.

Truth    

WOW, FINALLY THESE BRAINLESS CHICS HAVE A BRAIN??? THANKS TO SHERLOCK HOLMES, WE FOUND A FEW IQ LYING AROUND... JUST SAYIN.

1214 days ago
21.

btty    

Yuk! Too much information.

1214 days ago
22.

Fred Farkel    

Charlies WORST day - is 10,000 times better than any TMZ LOSER'S best day.

ANd yet - Charlie just cannot live up to the expectations of the typical TMZ LOSER???

LOLOLOLOLOLOL

Whatever.

You TMZ LOSERS simply CANNOT PROCESS.

1214 days ago
23.

Fred Farkel    

kitnplaynabout an hour ago

Too bad, Natalie, you are branded. Everyone in the world knows you are a gold-digging whore. Someday, you might have children, and they will know that you were a gold-digging whore. Actually, when you take money or gifts for sex, the true word is prostitute. Nothing special about offering up your genitals for money, any halfwit can do it.
__________________________________________


Actually no.

I hire my contractor for his brains and abilty to use his hands to build me neat things.

Why wouldn't you hire an expert to use her charms and genitals to do neat things too???

1214 days ago
24.

AndUKnowThisMan    

Charlie is a God!!

1214 days ago
25.

Jake    

Charlie asking for the car back is a real douchebag move. This poor girl stood by you the entire Torpedoes of Turds Tour. For that alone she should get to keep the car.

1214 days ago
26.

Carvey    

Hey Charlie, what's it like getting dumped by women you have to pay to have sex with you? Sure as heck can't call that winning.

1214 days ago
27.

Becca    

Carlos has become so old and ugly. Jus*****ched "The Departed." Martin Sheen was great, and looks younger than his crack-head son.

WTF is "winning" about having to pay large sums of money to working ladies to endure your company for an hour or two?

1214 days ago
28.

Liz    

Pray for them all.
Seriously .. what a waste of air.

1214 days ago
29.

some guy    

Two words: Hu bris.

1214 days ago
30.

some guy    

Charlie how does it feel to be the scion of Hollywood legends and the laughingstock of Hollywood at the same time. Hmmm is it too late to get Chuck on the phone?

1214 days ago
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