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Comedian Ralphie May

Weed Nearly Killed Me!

1/19/2012 3:30 AM PST BY TMZ STAFF

comedian Ralphie May
"Last Comic Standing" finalist and outspoken weed advocate Ralphie May is finally calling it quits on the sticky icky -- telling TMZ, smoking marijuana nearly killed him last year ... so he's giving it up for good.

May tells us, he was diagnosed with walking pneumonia before taking a cruise last November -- but the condition quickly got worse ... and before long, he was holed up in the boat's infirmary with a life-threatening lung infection.

May tells us, "If I hadn't been a 20-year weed smoker, it wouldn't have been as bad."

You'll recall -- May was detained in a Guam airport back in 2010 for weed possession after the comic decided to pet a drug-sniffing dog. Not his brightest moment.

May says he used to smoke around 4 ounces of pot a WEEK, but "feels great" ever since he quit -- adding, "I had a great time doing it, but now I can pet every dog in Guam."


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He's so full of ish... 4 oz in a week... I know that's impossible unless you are SNOOP DOGG!!! cause he smokes BLUNTS!!! He isn't even that famous so how could he afford that kind of "habit"!!! Makes me sick what people will try to blame for their own FAULTS!!! Who paid him to come out and blame WEED!!!

919 days ago

Selebraties Suck    

Four ounces a week???? That's a thousand dollars a week on weed. When did he find the time to eat in between joints?

919 days ago


this guy is stupid that is why they make altneratives so you dont have to smoke especially if you are diagnosed with pnuemonia

919 days ago

Dennis Johnson    

4ozs of weed a week........... I guess it did cause him problems.He does not look like he has lost any weight and we all know as fat as he is there will always be health problems.I say lose some weight and get healthy.

919 days ago


Ridiculous. Can he not notice for twenty PLUS years he's been a glut and smoking on top would cause his O2 intake to not be so much. Dude totally lives for fried twinkies and loves to sit around. Not the brightest crayon for petting DRUG DOGS so how could we expect him to know the real facts on marijuana. The gluten is the mush known as his brain. Gluttonous Sloth @RalhieMay P.s. How did he sit on that plane, the rudder?

919 days ago


Please - I don't even smoke anymore and ANYONE can tell you it's the weight not the weed.....for all you naysayers - good - more for the people who do smoke and enjoy it....just keep your stupid opinions to yourselves....

919 days ago


I got pneumonia after smoking pot before...I was so embarrassed when the dr asked me if I smoke.... It was scary I was never that sick before in my life and am rarely ever sick. So it can happen...also makes a lot of guys limp if they are Chronics hahahaha

919 days ago


919 days ago


Call Liberty Medical....

....they'll help you live a better life.

Diabeetus will kill him - weed just keeps him eating the Doritos.

919 days ago


Seems like it'd be his weight causing his issues & not weed. He's well over 300 pounds, he's obese .... put the fork down !!

919 days ago


Four OZ.'s a week?!?! Thats a gram every hour, for 16 hours a day for seven days. That doesn't leave much time to ****, shower, shave, sleep and most importantly (at least for Ralphie) eat.

919 days ago


I'm pretty sure his morbid obesity had MORE to do with his pneumonia than anything else.

People like him (adding to this hatred of the Holy Herb, and fatties who can't control their food intake) make me sick. Literally.

Oh, and his "comedy" sucks.

919 days ago


Oh please, if you weren't so fat and on a germ boat you would have been fine.. we all get sick sometimes.

919 days ago


I'm pretty sure it's his Morbid Obesity which nearly killed him, and will continue to do so. Not herb. The stupid fatty.

People like him make me sick. As if we need MORE a-holes out there bashing the Holy Herb. That reminds me. Last night I caught an old 1980's flick called Made in America, and there's a line in it where the white girl (there were two girls. One white, one Native American) says, "read me page 113" (it was in ref to a Nostradamus book) and she said, "everyone thinks this is about Nuclear war man, but it's in our veins." That got me thinking, considering accidental prescription overdoses FAR surpassed car accidents, illegal drug deaths and even gun shots as the number one cause of accidental deaths in over half of our states, well, doesn't that mean that the war is in full effect. Fat boy May here is probably swallowing pills by the handful, for all his ailments associated with his weight. But no, nope, those aren't killing him. Nor is his love of an unhealthy diet.

I hate stupid people and if you're against herb -still, you ARE stupid.

919 days ago


OK, we all know that smoke in the lungs isn't all that great for you. Even campfire contains some level of carcinogens. But I don't think this guy can claim that his admittedly excessive marijuana use is the cause of his lung infection. Would he have recovered more quickly if there wasn't twenty years worth of tar in his lungs? Probably. I hope people don't take this chump talking about how an herb almost killed him seriously.

919 days ago
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