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Lindsay Lohan

I Won't Be In Court ...

I'm Sick

1/29/2013 1:00 PM PST BY TMZ STAFF

0129_lindsay_lohan_soho_shopping_launchLindsay Lohan is gonna be in a heap of trouble tomorrow ... we've learned she will NOT be in an L.A. court Wednesday as required, because she claims she's sick ... but pictures prove otherwise.

We've learned Lindsay's new lawyer, Mark Heller, submitted documents notifying the judge she's too ill to fly.  Heller submitted a note from a Park Avenue doctor who says Lindsay has an upper respiratory infection and can't fly for her own safety as well as the safety of the public.

Heller also submitted an article from the New York Post from January 11, reporting that a flu epidemic has hit the Big Apple.

But take a look at the pictures showing Lindsay on an all-day shopping spree in SoHo Saturday -- the same day the doctor allegedly examined her. She's even smoking ... which doesn't seem like great idea for someone with a respiratory infection.


Interesting ... the judge hasn't even approved Heller -- a New York lawyer -- to appear in a California court on Lindsay's behalf and already there are shenanigans.

As for Lindsay ... she's in trouble.  The judge could issue a warrant for her arrest if the excuse proves bogus.


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Lol real mature here. This isn't high school where you're skipping class. Its way over time she went to jail and learned a lesson. She doesn't care for her job, is a pain to other actors, brushes off the law and apparently court dates. She's had more opportunities than any non celebrity deserves by far and then some.

541 days ago


Lindsay Lohan Called In Sick To Court, Is A Moron

Now that she’s free of that bitch Shawn Holley who kept keeping her out of jail, Lindsay Lohan finally has a lawyer who lets her do whatever stupid **** she wants. Stupid **** like not flying back to LA for a court hearing tomorrow because she’s “sick” and then being photographed shopping all over New York. TMZ reports:

We’ve learned Lindsay’s new lawyer, Mark Heller, submitted do***ents notifying the judge she’s too ill to fly. Heller submitted a note from a Park Avenue doctor who says Lindsay has an upper respiratory infection and can’t fly for her own safety as well as the safety of the public.
Heller also submitted an article from the New York Post from January 11, reporting that a flu epidemic ha***** the Big Apple.

Wait, hold up, did one of those reasons just say Lindsay Lohan is a public health hazard? I take back everything I said. This guy’s good. This guy’s real good.

541 days ago

Peter Sc    

It would be better if she remained in Europe. She would not be arrested after the Polanski ruling came and she would not make the roads unsafe in California. Because none wants to hire her as long as she doesn't serve her time to end probation which makes her shackled her shopping spree will end and she will find a shelter to live in. If she makes it to Denmark she is welcome to drop in.

541 days ago



541 days ago


Shopping spree? Isn't she supposed to be broke?

541 days ago


Where is that Kanye West guy and his ridiculous comments today? He is usually on every page. Maybe he is making more bad music in the studio today rather than commenting here,lol

541 days ago

Its Nikki Bitches    

Friday, 30 November 2012

Fire Your Attorney- The NY Times Called Him The Worst Attorney in US

Dear Lindsay:

While we don’t personally know each other, I feel compelled to inform you about your choice in attorneys, Mark Jay Heller. If you care about your freedom- you will fire him immediately and retain competent representation.

My name is Kristin Davis, perhaps you may have heard of me, I am the Ex- Manhattan Madam who was arrested in the wake of arrests involving Former NY Governor Eliot Spitzer – I also ran for Governor of NY in 2010 and Lifetime recently did a special on my life.

Mark Heller used to represent me. He did nothing to get me out of jail when I was arrested because he was more concerned with generating press for himself. He left me sitting in Riker’s Island for 4 months despite dozens of pleas from my family and myself to file a bail reduction. He got kicked out of two courtrooms for his outlandish behavior and stole $175,000 from my family as money he told us was for bail.

After 4 months of his self-publicizing incompetence, I fired him. I was out on reduced bail 4 days later.

I am not the only person he has screwed over. In 2005, Mark Heller was banned by the NY Bar for 5 years for stealing people’s bail money and not showing up to court to represent his clients. There were 36 counts against him and 18 different plaintiffs. You can see the court paperwork here which was given to me by my ADA because pretty much every NY Prosecutor hates Mark Heller because he insults them and turns the courtroom into a circus to make himself famous – which certainly doesn’t help you impending case. Also see the final page where a murder case was pardoned because the judge deemed the murderer’s attorney, Mark Heller, imcompetent.

After my arrest, Mark Heller went around publicizing that he was my attorney (as well as the Son of Sams) and got himself some very high profile clients as a result. What those particular news stories didn’t tell you is that he got FIRED from all of those cases because he is an awful attorney who puts getting his own press before the welfare of his clients.

According to the NY Times, Mark Heller briefly represented Jon Gosselin for his divorce and totally screwed up his case. He also represented David W. Johnson, former aide to NY Governor David Patterson, in an assault case against his companion who was dressed in a Halloween costume at the time. Mark Heller asked Mr. Johnson to plan to stage a news conference and unveil a “French maid” costume similar to the one the woman wore. With whiplash speed, he was fired. He also briefly represented Jason Izler, a NY Pimp, who later fired him for his incompetence because he got him an extremely lengthy sentence.

I have been in the position you were in – in the precinct waiting for an attorney to help me get out. Perhaps you didn’t know Mr. Heller because he certainly is a hawk and if he had saw the news about you-would run for the precinct to offer his services free of charge – or be vague about fees to get you on the hook as his client.

I cannot sit idly by and let Mark Heller ruin another life. He will try to take your case to trial to get media publicity – and he will lose and you will end up in jail.

I’m not really sure how to reach you so my only thought is to blast this to the media to get your attention. I don’t care for the publicity of it all but I certainly don’t want to see your life get screwed up because you chose the wrong attorney and didn’t know the facts.

I hope you retain competent counsel because it’s the most important thing in making sure you stay out of jail. Take it from me who spent 4 months in Rikers because my attorney lied to me and my family about bail and filed ridiculous motions which had no chance in winning just to get press. I made the wrong choice in attorneys by choosing Mark Jay Heller -don’t follow in my footsteps. Your freedom is at stake.

Should you wish to reach me, you can do so at


Kristin Davis

PS- If Mark Heller in any way tries to disparage my credibility, see the links above. Fact is fact. I hired him ONE WEEK PRIOR to my arrest to negotiate my turning myself in. He was more concerned with selling my story and a week later I was in RIKERS ISLAND. See retainer check here for more proof. Check dated March 18, 2008 - I was arrested March 25, 2008. I'm not writing this for the press, I'm writing this because I don't want anyone else to be hurt by this man. I would write it to anyone I know retained Mark Heller- not just a celebrity. Its the right thing to do.

541 days ago


Just shoot her and be done with it

541 days ago


TMZ stop with the drama. Those pics in NY were taken 3 DAYS AGO! whats up? Lindsay not allowed to be sick?

H8turds, try taking a flight with an upper respiratory infection, you'll feel the PAIN.

541 days ago


When isn't Lindsay lying?

541 days ago


From the time she was instructed not to fly, which was Saturday, she had 3 full days to get from New York to Los Angeles. It takes 40 hours to drive by car. Last time I checked, 3 fulls days amounted to 72 hours. She would have had enough time to travel, and still get a good night's sleep before court as well. But then, she pulls the strings on her punishments, not the court. If the court had any balls, they would not have let her manipulate them for as long as she has.

541 days ago


TMZ stop trying to make it seem like lohan is going to actually get in trouble. We all know nothing is going to happen to her and she's not going to be in a heap of anything.

541 days ago


Doesn't really matter. She will never be more than the concrete slug she is now. Jail, rehab, whore to the famous, bad porn actress, or crack den dweller, she will forever remain as she is now. No matter what she acts in, no one will go see it. She is just one rung from the bottom. She is broke and homeless except for the men who support her for unspeakable sexual favors. She is Lindsay Lohan, the girl people look to for being the train wreck she is.

541 days ago


LOCK THE BIOTCH UP! We have to follow the rules

541 days ago


The dog ate my homework, really! She is acting like a child and she's pushing 30. Unreal. Looks like the judge has no choice but to throw the book at her.

541 days ago
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