Ron Jeremy Calls From Hospital Bed -- I'm Lucky to Be Alive!!!

Porn legend Ron Jeremy is in shockingly amazing spirits after his near-death aneurysm last week -- and why wouldn't he be ... Ron tells us, he'd be a DEAD MAN right now if not for the amazing docs who saved his life.

Ron called in to TMZ Live moments ago from Cedars-Sinai -- and even though he sounds a little tired, he was in a great mood cracking jokes ... even describing how he'd direct a porn scene in his new hospital room.

Ron says his aneurysm -- located near his heart -- was caused by his weight and high blood pressure ... and if he waited any longer than he did to see a doctor, he'd be dead.

And get this -- Ron says several hospital employees have already asked for his autograph.