The owner of the salon where Tanning Mom went for regular UV treatment insists there's NO WAY he's responsible for turning her into a walking baseball mitt -- because her kind of tan isn't from a normal tanning bed.

City Tropics owner Anthony Ruccatano tells TMZ, Patricia Krentcil's extremely dark tan is more likely from a special sponge-on tan used by bodybuilders -- and it was NOT provided by City Tropics.

Anthony claims, "On stage [bodybuilders] look normal because the lights are so bright, but when they come outside it looks like tree bark." He adds, Patricia looks like she was "dipped in chocolate."

Anthony says Patricia paid $99 a month for unlimited tanning treatments at his facility -- tanning approximately 20-25 times a month.

Anthony also tells us, to the best of his knowledge ... Patricia's 5-year-old daughter was sitting in a car with her father the day she was allegedly burned on a tanning bed. Anthony previously told other media outlets the girl was in the building, just not in the tanning room.

As far as a Tanning Mom ban goes -- Anthony says, "I don't know if that's legal to do. So I wouldn't do it."

Supermodel Miranda Kerr showed off her smokin' hot maternal instincts in a sexy white bikini while on the beach with her adorable son in Bora Bora the other day.

Further proof why Orlando Bloom is the luckiest -- and most hated -- man in the world.

"Wedding Crashers" babe Isla Fisher showed she has her husband Sacha Baron Cohen's back ... by wearing a t-shirt of his new movie on her front.

The 36-year-old rocked "The Dictator" swag while in Central Park with her daughter on Monday.

Isla proves you don't have to dump ashes on Ryan Seacrest to promote this flick.

Tanning Mom looks like she's 102-year-old bacon, but thinks she's a hip-hop fan in her 20s -- 'cause she was bumping Jay-Z loud enough to shatter the windows ... on her MINI-VAN!!

Tanning Mom -- aka Patricia Krentcil, aka Crypt Keeper, aka Burnt Beef Jerky -- was sitting in her driveway this weekend in Nutley, NJ blasting the only Jigga song you'd expect her to play ... "Young Forever."

While TM was chillin' to Jay ... she clearly got a little pissed off waiting for her husband.

Eventually, she stormed out of the car and back into the house ... showing off her severely over-tanned legs in a severely revealing outfit.

Just call us "jealous, fat, and ugly."

"Teen Mom" star Jenelle Evans took time out from getting arrested to show off her new pride and joy ... her brand new boobs.

After going under the knife just last week, the 20-year-old flaunted her new buxom figure in a well endowed pink bikini on the beach in North Carolina this weekend.

While her mother is taking care of her son Jace, let's hope Jenelle can retain custody of her new girls.

OctoMom's first day as a self-serving porn star is in the can ... so to speak.

TMZ has learned ... Nadya Suleman completed her first day of XXX shooting at a porn mansion in the San Fernando Valley on Thursday ... and we're told things couldn't have gone better!!!

We're told Octo appeared nervous when she arrived to the home ... but after chatting with some other porn stars who were at the house, she seemed to calm down.

Before the shoot, producers decided it would be a good idea to screen some porno flicks for Octo as an educational tool ... so to speak.

But when it was time for Octo to get down to business ... with herself ... one source on the set tells us "She was a natural ... she looked great!!"

Hopefully Octo has a good babysitter -- 'cause she's due back on the set next week.

As the latest pregnant famous person to do their best Demi Moore Vanity Fair cover impersonation, topless former Tiger Woods mistress Rachel Uchitel showed off her growing baby bump -- and nearly everything else -- in a sexy maternity g-string.

This is baby's first thong.

The 37-year-old -- who is due in eight days -- then went a little more demure by also posing covered up in a sheet.

Uchitel -- who's married to former Penn State football player Matt Hahn -- knows a new mother needs to set a good example.

On the heels of Jessica Simpson finally giving birth yesterday ... "How I Met Your Mother" star Alyson Hannigan proved she's ready to become the new Hollywood Queen of the Baby Bump during a stroll in L.A. on Tuesday.

The 38-year-old -- who is due in June -- has some enormous maternity shoes to fill.

The Jessica Simpson baby countdown is finally over -- because she just gave birth to a bouncing baby girl ... who weighed 9 pounds 13 ounces and measured in at 21.75 inches!!!

The kid's name is Maxwell Drew Johnson -- which is pretty normal by celebrity baby naming standards.

Jessica and her fiance Eric Johnson decided to use the name Drew because it's Jessica's mother's maiden name.

Jess just released a statement on her website ... saying, "Eric and I are elated to announce the birth of our baby girl Maxwell Drew Johnson."

"We are so grateful for all of the love, support and prayers we have received. This has been the greatest experience of our lives."

Angelina Jolie pulled a very special "Jolie" earlier today -- showing some leg on Hollywood Blvd ... while brandishing her fat new engagement ring.

The 36-year-old actress is serious wife material.

Just three months after giving birth to little Blue Ivy, Beyonce showed off her curvy maternal physique in a chic one piece black Norma Kamali swimsuit while taking a dip in the Caribbean on Monday.

The 30-year-old is one hot mama.