A slut can be defined in so many ways -- but the following gem, which came from the mind of "Tough Love" trainwreck Arian Mayer during an interview with "Steppin Out" magazine, is truly priceless:

"The truth of the matter is this; I've slept with about 100 people. If you want to call that being a slut, fine."



Interestingly, Webster's defines "slut" as -- "a promiscuous woman."

So, you be the judge.

Dr. Drew Pinsky gave some tough love to all the recovering celebrity addicts on his new show -- by torching all their sexual paraphernalia.

We're told to commemorate the end of an episode of "Sex Rehab with Dr. Drew," the doc took his new band of on-air wannabe rehabbed intercourse junkies on an outing into the woods -- confiscated their assortment of sexual aides, toys and porn -- and threw them into a ceremonial bonfire. Burn, "Horny Baby Mamas 4," Burn!

Sources tell us the good doctor did play it safe and had fire marshals present.

Can't you just smell the scent of burning rubbers?

As Dr. Drew was gearing up to hit "Today" and "The View" this morning to pimp out his new book, one of his celebrity patients was recklessly falling off the wagon.


"Sober House"-mate Mary Carey was so tanked, she was hardly able to stand outside the Key Club -- struggling to keep her eyes open, shouting maniacally, and of course, making out with her lady friend.

Unfortunately, it's more tragic than entertaining .. especially the part where Mary shouted "I'm not sober anymore, but I love Dr. Drew!"

You know you've got a bad show on your hands when people are suing you for putting you in it.

VH1 is being sued by Anne McCourt -- an old lady who lives in Los Angeles -- for defamation after the network aired footage of her in 2007 trashing Paris Hilton on "Celebrity Eye Candy."

According to court documents, McCourt was walking her dog when she stumbled upon a group of cameramen waiting on the street for Paris Hilton. As old people usually do, she approached them to ask what they were doing. When asked about the starlet, McCourt flew into a tirade, saying, "I think she's an ass...I think she's ugly. And I think she's a disgusting human being..."

Problem is, the 81-year-old McCourt apparently didn't know she was was being filmed ... apparently unaware what cameramen actually do for a living. Additionally, McCourt claims that the footage was edited to make it sound as if she had "exposed her private parts" in a way similar to Hilton. Thanks for that, VH1.

The real tragedy here is that Paris is still, according to McCourt, a "disgusting human being"... and she can't sue anyone for it.

Think of "America's Next Top Model" -- but instead of focusing on smoking hot babes in bikinis, this show casts its lens on the dorks behind the lens. Then you'd have "The Shot" -- but don't worry, there are still plenty of chicks in bikinis.


Premiering next month on VH1, "The Shot" (from the very same producers as "ANTM") is a competition between 10 aspiring fashion photographers to find the next great ... well, fashion photographer. Russell James fills the role of Tyra on the show -- which is to say he will serve as host and judge, not front his own talk show.

"The Shot" premieres November 4 on VH1.

This past week, the cell phone number of eyeliner-wearing, crushed velvet-hat clad Mystery, host of hit VH1 show "The Pick-Up Artist" was posted online. The ladies of Jezebel.com decided to give Mystery a ring. Among the topics discussed: Mystery's favorite rock gods, his sex life, and Scott Baio. Yes, Scott Baio.

Mr. Mystery -- real name Erik Von Markovik -- rambled on about why Scott Baio was "45 and single" as his hit VH1 show proclaims. "It's sort of the same thing as if I were to see Bea Arthur of "The Golden Girls" have sex. Why would I want to watch someone who has already gone through menopause go through that? It's biology. I'm evolutionally calibrated to not find that attractive." Say what? Maybe he's trying to "Neg" Baio.

He also waxed poetic on how hard it is to have a relationship, now that he's known worldwide as a lead lothario. "I've put myself in an interesting position where I have a lot of opportunities. And there are some people on this planet who we're spiritually connected to," he said. So that's what the kids are calling it these days, a "spiritual connection!"

And watch out L.A.-area ladies -- Mystery just relocated from Las Vegas to the Thirty Mile Zone. He's looking to have a spiritual connection with you.

Bret Michaels and the casting agents at VH1 sure know how to pick 'em!

Brandi C. from VH1's "Rock of Love" has been busy since the show wrapped -- shooting a porn flick! Brandi, or as she's named on babygotboobs.com, "Brittany," went straight from filming Brett Michaels' show -- to shooting a threesome. That's a busy girl!

According to her MySpace page, the busty blonde recently walked the red carpet for the first time. She was as relaxed in front of the cameras with her clothes on ... as she is with them off!

TMZ contacted Brandi/Brittany's rep who had "No comment."

Caution! Trainwreck crossing! The red carpet parade for Flava Flav's VH1 roast was an express run of the D-list's top trainwrecks.

Chuckling roast attendees included the "girls" from "Charm School," "Surreal Life" disasters, more-orange-than-ever Carrot Top, Flava Flav himself -- and a wide assortment of celebratory wreckage. Paging Kathy Griffin! As always, VH1's star line-up did not dissappoint -- in the tragically hilarious category.

Click on in for a look at the purple "red" carpet parade. Protective eyewear recommended.

Former "All My Children" male-to-female transgendered lesbian British rocker, Zarf, has reappeared as Scott Baio's brunette psychologist on his new VH1 reality show! Zarfie loves Chachi! Well, not really.

Although Dr. Alison Arnold on "Scott Baio, 45 and Single" sure looks like the trannylicious Zarf, she is, in fact, a biological woman ... and has a resume to boot! Ali's worked with Olympic athletes, politicians and many other celebrities. She helps people and organizations "take off" limiting beliefs, and "scream" their greatness in the way they live, work, and love. Just like Zarf did!

You go, girl!

San Fernando Valley lothario Scott Baio, who has allegedly had his way with numerous Hollywood honeys -- including Heather Locklear, Pamela Anderson, Denise Richards and Nicollette Sheridan -- is now 45 and still single. What?

Chachi, seen here with pal Jason Hervey (Wayne on "Wonder Years"), is now joining the rank ranks of Flava Flav and Bret Michaels on VH1 to search for a soulmate. The show will follow Baio as he tries to find himself while enduring a mid-life crisis, wondering why he's still single and unable to settle down -- not even with his current girlfriend, Renee. Walk away, Renee!

Baio has agreed to fully surrender the next eight weeks of his life to exhaustive introspection with a life coach, Dr. Alison Arnold, otherwise known as "Doc Ali." Doc Ali will try to get to the core of his problem, and Scott will be forced to revisit some ex-girlfriends -- and take a vow of celibacy.

If the lengthy list of Scotty's beam-ups is true, a vow of celibacy might not stick!

The best way to describe one of the mini-shows featured on tonight's episode of "Acceptable TV" is that it's like "The O.C." ... but everyone is 80.

It takes place at Shady Acres, which is "a home for teenagers with Rapid Aging Disorder." So while all the characters look over the hill, they are actually just 18-year-olds who watch "Lord of the Rings" obsessively and play "Gears of War." No Depends for them!

Check out tonight's episode of "Acceptable TV" at 10:00 PM on VH1.