It's every guy's fantasy -- running into a hot beauty pageant chick like Miss Indonesia -- followed by every most guys' nightmare ... watching that chick cross her legs and talk about a "tuck."
Probably a good time to brush up on some Indonesia stuff.
It's Mel to the Rescue
In Bankruptcy Case
3/5/2014 2:46 PM PST BY TMZ STAFF
Mel Gibson may end up saving the woman who ruined him.
Oksana Grigorieva just filed docs in her bankruptcy case, claiming she can only afford $372 a month to repay her debts -- listed at $438,000 -- but at that rate, it will take her nearly a hundred years to make good.
So, Oksana is asking the court to clear the balance of her debts after 5 years -- when she'll only have repaid $22,320 ... or 5% of her total debt ... most of which she owes to the lawyers she employed in her war against Mel.
The funny part ... Mel is currently paying Oksana $20,000 a month in child support for their daughter Lucia -- so if she gets what she's asking for in the bankruptcy case, she could clear her debt in one fell swoop with a single child support check from her one time sugar daddy.
So the lawyers get screwed, Mel gets screwed and Oksana ... well, that's just what she does.
Suspected in Kardashian Jewelry Heist
3/5/2014 1:26 PM PST BY TMZ STAFF
Lamar Odom's drug dealers could be linked to the $250,000 jewelry heist at Lamar and Khloe's house ... because we're told the dealers threatened to break in to get the money Lamar never paid.
Multiple sources involved in Lamar's drug deals last year tell TMZ ... Lamar wasn't paying his tab. In fact, our sources say he was in the hole $15K to just one dealer back in Sept. and he owed another more than $40K.
Lamar would fend them off by saying he was loaded and therefore good for it. He would also justify not paying from time to time because the quality of the drugs was "wack."
We're told Lamar owed 10s of thousands of dollars to drug dealers when he left for Spain last month.
Now the plot thickens. We're told Lamar was getting text messages threatening his safety and also warning him they would break into his home to get even.
Cops don't know who stole the expensive jewelry but we're told there was no sign of forced entry. One source says he has reason to believe one of the dealers had connections to someone who works for the family and had lawful access to the house.
Oldest Woman in the World
And Zero Plastic Surgery
3/5/2014 12:40 PM PST BY TMZ STAFF
She's 116 years old today -- and she still looks better than half of Hollywood.
Misao Okawa -- recognized by the Guinness World Records as the world's oldest woman -- celebrated her record-breaking birthday today at a nursing home in Osaka, Japan.
She officially became the world's oldest person back in 2013 -- you know, after the last one died.
Eat your sushi, folks.
Cops to Sean Kingston
Eenie Meenie Miney Mo ...
Pay Your Bar Tab, Or We Can't Let You Go
3/5/2014 12:00 PM PST BY TMZ STAFF
Sean Kingston might be used to getting freebies -- but TMZ has learned, he had to answer to cops in the Dominican Republic this weekend after allegedly skipping out on an $8K bar tab.
The singer was with friends Saturday at a place called Euphoria -- and sources at the club tell us, there was a miscommunication between Sean and the managers. We're told the managers promised to "take care of" Sean and Sean thought that meant comping his drinks -- not so.
We're told Sean had a great time -- drinking, smoking hookah -- and ran up a bill of $8,771 ... before leaving the club without paying a dime.
According to sources, the club quickly called Dominican police -- who eventually tracked Sean down on Sunday ... insisting he had to pay the bill, or he wouldn't be able to leave the country.
When he realized the mistake, we're told Sean was VERY apologetic -- and returned to the club to ante up in full.
Peeing Behind Bars
Jail's Got More Cameras Than 'Big Brother'
3/5/2014 11:12 AM PST BY TMZ STAFF
This is getting ridiculous ... the Miami Beach PD just released yet another video of Justin Bieber in jail -- this time showing the singer peeing into a cup -- and it feels like an episode of "Big Brother."
So far, the Miami Beach PD has released 9+ hours of footage (photos too) showing Bieber in jail following his DUI arrest -- including the pat-down, the push ups, the sobriety test, the tattoos ... and now they're showing Bieber taking his urinalysis test.
As we reported, the urinalysis test came back positive for Xanax and weed. (This is NOT the video clip police are having trouble blurring. It's a different camera angle of the same thing.)
It's like the police are turning Bieber's arrest into a mini reality show -- they claim the singer isn't entitled to privacy in jail ... and they might be right ... but we've never seen anything like this before.
And we've seen plenty of DUI arrests.
In other news...
We're not sure how or why it started, but Kylie Jenner was caught rolling around on the floor fighting with one of her bigger sisters.
Watch the video!
Yankee Doodle Dandy
3/5/2014 9:20 AM PST BY TMZ STAFF
Wearing a fancy shirt unbuttoned to his belly, Joe Simpson thanked his lucky stars and stripes at a party in Beverly Hills Tuesday night -- getting handsy with a man dressed as the American Flag, sitting on his lap.
Teresa & Joe Giudice
Let Us Serve Prison Time Separately
We Have Kids!!!
3/5/2014 8:50 AM PST BY TMZ STAFF
"Real Housewives of New Jersey" stars Teresa and Joe Giudice want to serve their prison terms separately ... so at least one parent can remain with their 4 children while the other is behind bars, TMZ has learned.
Teresa and Joe's attorney Miles Feinstein tells us, the couple will ask the judge to stagger their sentences -- i.e. serve them consecutively rather than concurrently -- for the sake of their four daughters (aged four, eight, nine, and thirteen). Their sentencing date is July 8.
As we reported, the Giudices pleaded guilty Tuesday in their money fraud case -- Teresa to four counts and Joe to five. Teresa faces 21 to 27 months in prison and Joe faces up to 46.
Feinstein is confident the judge will grant their request -- he says the judge has granted similar requests before.
As for the sentences, Feinstein is trying to see the silver lining -- yes it sucks ... but he says the outcome was the best they could have hoped for. Indicted on 41 criminal counts, Feinstein says the couple originally faced 100+ years in prison ... but got off with just a few.
Mexican TV Anchor Sued
Your Crappy Reporting Almost Got Me Killed!
3/5/2014 8:45 AM PST BY TMZ STAFF
Famed Mexican news anchor Jorge Ramos allegedly placed an innocent man in the crosshairs of Guatemalan crime lords ... by falsely pegging him as the U.S. Federal agent who arrested a key member of a human smuggling ring ... so claims the victim in a new lawsuit.
Byron Lemus claims he became a man on the run after the release of Jorge's book, "Dying to Cross." Jorge wrote in his book that Lemus was the Eliot Ness of Immigration who took down the massive Central American human smuggling cell 10 years ago.
Lemus claims criminals connected to the smuggling cell have since threatened the lives of him and his family ... once nearly killing them in a drive-by shooting -- all because of Jorge's book.
Sources close to Lemus tell us, he did work at the U.S. embassy at the time of the investigation -- but he was basically a low-level chauffeur who had ZERO involvement with the bust.
We're told Lemus and his family have been forced to move to the U.S. because of the target on his back. He's currently working as a day laborer.
He doesn't say in the lawsuit what he wants ... but we're guessing lots of pesos.
Justin's Ass-Kissing Won't Work
3/5/2014 8:32 AM PST BY TMZ STAFF
Selena Gomez isn't falling for Justin Bieber's old tricks anymore ... she's exercising her rehab knowledge and slamming the door shut on any future relationship.
Sources close to Selena tell us ... Selena scoffed at Biebs' Instagram photo of her at an Oscars party with the caption, "Most elegant princess in the world." Sorry J.B. ... we're told she laughed out loud when she saw it, saying it was stupid and childish.
Selena's party line ... she went to rehab to get over Justin and it worked. The reality ... she went to rehab for booze and weed. Good luck, Selena.
Pee Wee Herman
Famous Movie Bicycle Can Be Yours
... In Pieces
3/5/2014 8:26 AM PST BY TMZ STAFF
The bicycle that Pee-Wee Herman refused to sell for even a hundred million, trillion, billion dollars ... is up for sale ... but for a whole lot less.
One of the bikes used to film the 1985 flick "Pee-Wee's Big Adventure" is being auctioned on eBay ... and the owner tells us he has a letter of authenticity from the studio to prove it's the real deal.
Just one problem: some assembly is required.
The seller says the bike is in pieces but he says all the parts are there -- including the bicycle bell and the handlebar streamers. He says he'll also throw in an autographed photo of Paul Reubens.
The owner tells us he bought the cruiser in 2010 for $10K ... he's hoping to get at least $15K for it from the auction. Current bid is $8K.
Penis is a Moving Target
Hard to Blur
3/5/2014 6:52 AM PST BY TMZ STAFF
Miami Beach cops are having technical difficulties with Justin Bieber's penis ... because it moves too much.
Law enforcement sources tell us ... they fully intend to release more jailhouse videos of the dainty jailbird ... including one showing him peeing into the visible jail toilet. The judge previously ordered cops to blur Bieber's junk before releasing it ... we mean the video.
But there's a problem ... Our sources say they're having trouble obfuscating Bieber's genital area, because he moves as he pees. But they're also having technical issues blurring the video.
We're told the police tech team has been working on the problem non-stop since Tuesday.
The judge will review the police department's handiwork before releasing the video.
Famed Wrestler Buff Bagwell
I'm A Successful Gigolo Now!
3/5/2014 5:45 AM PST BY TMZ STAFF
Legendary wrestler Buff Bagwell is still trading on his lady's man image ... now, as a gigolo.
Bagwell -- who was a force in World Championship Wrestling between 1991 and 2001 -- has joined Cowboys4Angels ... a premium gigolo service targeting lonely and very possibly horny women.
Bagwell has appeared on the Showtime hit, "Gigolos," but he's not just doing it for the camera.
As for Cowboys4Angels ... it provides "escorts" who offer companionship -- reading between the lines is highly permissible.
The company charges a pretty penny for Bagwell's services -- $800 for 2 hours, $1550 for 4 hours and $3000 for an overnight "visit." Weekends are steep -- $8K. And a full week with Bagwell -- $25K.
The owner of the service -- Garren James -- tells TMZ, Bagwell is already the second most popular escort on the website ... behind Nick Hawk.
Bagwell is married, but apparently unlike Robin Thicke, it's a true open relationship.