George Clooney threw the ultimate baller's dinner for President Obama -- but for some reason Billy Crystal wasn't exactly thrilled on the way out. Must be the $40k tab.

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Billy Crystal just announced ... he's replacing Eddie Murphy as the host for next year's Oscars show.

The legendary Academy Awards host tweeted just minutes ago -- "Am doing the Oscars so the young woman in the pharmacy will stop asking my name when I pick up my prescriptions. Looking forward to the show."

As we previously reported, Murphy backed out from hosting the show yesterday -- after his friend Brett Ratner resigned from producing it ... following uproar over a homophobic slur Ratner dropped at a film screening.

This will be Crystal's 9th time hosting the Oscars.

Hey, Billy Crystal's Jewish -- so why not ask him a two month old story about an organization offering Jewish families up to $50,000 to move to Alabama, right?

The Penguin flew solo to a "Dark Knight" after-party in NYC -- where the cast of the flick was absolutely swarmed by autographazzi and pappers staked outside.

Also in NY: Heath Ledger's ex-gf Naomi Watts showed up to the party for support too, Billy Crystal said Madge was a hottie, Ethan Hawke dodged Uma wedding rumors and Gabrielle Union put the A-Rod/Madonna gossip on blast.

In L.A.: Sports stars flooded LAX, the luckiest guy alive escorted Adriana Lima through the airport, Lindsay Lohan was in a foul mood and Robert Kardashian Jr. was clueless about his sis' upcoming jail stint.

Hearing airport security start shouting can be jarring -- and Billy Crystal definitely had no clue what the hell was going on when they began yelling "BRAVO!" yesterday at LAX.

The TSA code word is meant to make everyone freeze. Sorry Billy, they weren't applauding your work.

TMZ's cameras were rolling in New York City last night and as usual, we caught loads of your favorite celebs.

First, we stopped by MTV to get a quick glimpse of Rev Run and his family striking a pose as they left "TRL."

From there, we checked out the star-studded opening night of Martin Short's new Broadway production, "Martin Short: Fame Becomes Me" where the A-listers were arriving in droves!

Jerry Seinfeld rolled though, along with his good friend and "Seinfeld" co-creator Larry David, while Sarah Jessica Parker hit the red carpet with hubby Matthew Broderick. Tom Hanks and Billy Crystal also hit the scene as well as comedian Chevy Chase who arrived with his family.

The last stop for the night was hotspot Marquee where we saw "Idol" wannabe Constantine Maroulis and R&B singer John Legend.