Charlie Sheen tells TMZ ... he is NOT the mystery buyer who dropped $230k on Lawrence Taylor's Super Bowl ring ... despite widespread media reports to the contrary.

LT had gifted the Super Bowl XXV ring to his son TJ ... who decided to put the ring up for auction without asking his father for permission first. It sold for $230,401 ... and LT's agent told various media outlets he believed Sheen was the buyer.

According to Sheen ... LT's agent was wrong.

“As much as I would be honored to own such an important artifact, I had nothing to do with the acquisition" ... Sheen tells us.

It's not a crazy rumor ... considering Sheen is a bigtime sports memorabilia collector who already owns Babe Ruth's 1927 World Series ring.

No word if the REAL buyer plans to reveal his or her identity any time soon.

It's the decision we all saw coming ... "Two and a Half Men" has been greenlit for a 10th season.

The show's current stars -- Ashton Kutcher, Jon Cryer and Angus T. Jones --  are all getting raises, says The Hollywood Reporter ... with Kutcher's salary hitting between $700k to $725k per episode.

Despite Charlie Sheen's very public firing, the show still wrangles in 15 million viewers each week ... making it the No. 3 primetime comedy on TV.

Looks like when Sheen called the show a "steaming pile of s**t" ... he forgot that "s**t" makes a whole lotta money.

Charlie Sheen is getting some serious push-back from an NYC strip club ... and not in the good way ... because the nudie bar is REFUSING to change the name of its special "Charlie Sheen" VIP room.

We broke the story ... Charlie's legal assassins have fired their rockets of intimidation at Cheetahs Gentlemen's Club ... threatening to sue for using the Warlock's name without permission.

But the owner of the place, Sam Zherka, says he ain't afraid -- in fact, he's gonna throw a NAKED PARTY in the "Sheen Room" tomorrow to show he has NO INTENTION of backing down.

Still, Charlie's lawyer tells us, "The club’s ongoing efforts to attract media attention by using Charlie Sheen’s name and mischaracterizing the nature of his legal claims are more blatant attempts to promote the club by wrongfully exploiting my client’s publicity rights without his consent."

The drums of war are beating ...

Charlie Sheen dropping the hammer on a sushi-serving strip club in order to protect his reputation ... sounds like the start of a joke. But it's serious ... ly funny.

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Charlie Sheen is not about to have his reputation sullied by strip club customers chowing down on sushi strategically placed on the bodies of almost naked women ... and that's why he threatened to sue New York's Cheetahs Club.

The club named the VIP room after the actor, which did not sit well with him.  Charlie threatened suit, claiming the antics damaged his reputation.

The club owner told the New York Post's Page Six, "How could sushi damage Charlie Sheen's reputation?"

Now Charlie Sheen will never be associated with strippers ever again.

Ashton Kutcher is no Charlie Sheen ... and he never will be ... at least that's the message an L.A. TV network is trying to convey in a new marketing campaign.

KTLA in Los Angeles has plastered billboards all over town promoting the syndicated run of "Men." The billboards feature Charlie's face next to the words, "The Original" ... and if it seems like it's a shot at Kutcher ... that's because it is.

A mole at the station tells us ... the marketing people are playing off the premise that "Men" was simply better with Charlie. They believe fans miss him ... and will be more into the reruns because Charlie "was the show."

Can't argue with facts.

Charlie Sheen's show, "Anger Management," hasn't even debuted yet, and already there's a lawsuit over who created it and who gets the big money.

Joe Roth, the epic producer who is responsible for a bunch of shows and movies, including "Major League" and "Bachelor Party" and the guy who is at the helm of "Anger Management," is being sued by Jason Shuman, who claims he's responsible for turning Charlie's show into the TV version of the famous movie.

Shuman says he and Roth had a deal ... and he would get a huge chunk of the "Anger Management" profits. Shuman claims Roth is backing out of the deal, and he wants beaucoup bucks -- more than $50 million.

Roth is the dude who brought Charlie to the table for the new show.

Charlie Sheen tells TMZ, he's rich ... but he ain't Dodgers-buying rich -- and that's the ONLY reason he didn't throw down to acquire the struggling L.A. franchise.

Charlie was out in NYC yesterday -- telling us, it's "pretty cool" Magic Johnson and his investment team have agreed to purchase the Dodgers for $2 billion.

But when we ask why Charlie -- a notorious baseball fanatic -- wasn't buying the team instead of Magic, he replies, "I didn't have any money at the time."

"Any" is a bit of a stretch.

Charlie Sheen is ashamed about his sloshy behavior at a recent Guns N' Roses concert ... but not because he did anything wrong ... it's because he realized he can't handle his booze like he used to.

Sources close to Sheen tell TMZ -- the Warlock realized people were concerned he had fallen off the wagon ... but he is adamant ... he NEVER gave up booze. 

Sheen is telling friends he does drink occasionally ... and had a few drinks at the concert ... but they hit him "pretty hard" ... because he simply doesn't have the tolerance he had in his heyday.

Charlie told one friend, "This is what happens when you don't drink very often."

As far as his job goes ... we're told the clip (below) didn't appear to cause any concern with the muckety mucks at Sheen's new show "Anger Management" ... because no one ever mentioned it to Charlie.

If casting Kathy Bates as Charlie Harper's ghost on "Two and a Half Men" was supposed to be an insult, it failed miserably -- because Charlie Sheen is telling friends ... he's "honored" Bates will be playing his old character.

In case you didn't know -- Charlie Harper is scheduled to make a cameo on "Men" on April 30th, and exec producer Chuck Lorre thought it would be funny to cast Kathy Bates instead of Charlie Sheen.

But the jab backfired ... because sources close to Charlie tell TMZ, the Warlock LOVES Kathy. We're told Charlie thinks she's an incredibly funny, talented actress -- and is "honored" the two now share a connection.

According to sources, Charlie can't wait to see Kathy's portrayal -- and will definitely be watching the upcoming episode.

The woman who claims a cocaine-possessing Brooke Mueller attacked her in Aspen last year tells TMZ she's not surprised Brooke wasn't sentenced to jail today ... saying, "Rich people get what they want and poor people don't."

TMZ broke the story ... Mueller struck a plea deal with prosecutors regarding the Dec. 2 incident ... in which she agreed to plead guilty to cocaine possession and in exchange the judge dismissed the misdemeanor assault charge and another coke charge. Brooke was only sentenced to 1 year probation.

Now, Brooke's alleged victim Llena Little tells us, "I knew this was going to happen ... I already prepared myself for Brooke not getting jail time."

Llena says she has no plans to sue over the alleged attack ... explaining, "It is what it is."