Former Guns N' Roses member Slash and Vegas magician Criss Angel appear to be the douchey style inspirations of "Conan the Barbarian" remake star Jason Momoa.

The cheesy accessories don't lie.

We're just sayin'.

Super buff clown-haired comedian Carrot Top, 45, and gothtastic magician Criss Angel both wowed each other with their awesomeness at the same event in Vegas on Monday.


Question is ...

There is actually someone with more ridiculous hair, a faker tan and tackier man-jewelery than magician Criss Angel ... his wax sculpture.



The 41-year-old flat-ironed his weave and put on his best velveteen blazer for the unveiling of his Madame Tussauds mannequin in Vegas.

When does he make himself disappear?

Criss Angel is in the middle of a serious hostage situation -- and the hostage is a cute little kitty cat.

The Vegas magician is accused of taking a fluffy lil' feline belonging to fellow Vegas showman Jeff Beacher -- and now Beacher is getting his lawyers involved in an attempt to get his pet back.

In a strongly-worded letter fired off to Angel, Beacher accuses Angel of jacking the animal from a friend who was supposed to be watching the cat while Beacher mourned the death of his father.

Beacher claims Angel not only refuses to give it back -- but worse yet, he says the "Mindfreak" taunted him about the cat on the phone with comments like, "I took your cat ... he lives with me now ... the cat no longer likes you ... the cat and I have become close friends."

Now Beacher demands the safe return of the cat -- plus "the value of the use of his cat during the period of detention."

Calls to the cat have not yet been returned.

You won't see Hugh Hefner around if his ex Holly marries that magical d-bag Criss Angel, cause outside One Sunset Hef declared he wants nothing to do with those people. Remember, you're never too old to talk smack.

Oh yeah -- that chick next to him, totally wearing a see-thru dress.

It might seem obvious -- but when Holly Madison was asked which one of her men is the better lover, she was forced to choose between the douche bag paying for her dinner -- or the old bag who signs her checks.

Robin Leach is not amused.

Holly wouldn't say if she's seen his "magic wand" yet, but it looks like Criss Angel gave Ms. Madison something she probably wishes he could make magically disappear -- a hickey!

Usually when couples that live together break up, one person throws the others' crap out the window and tells them to go to hell. Not in the Hefner household.

Hef and Holly have broken up -- so they say -- but Holly told us she still calls the mansion her home. Interesting.

Madison also cleared up those pesky Criss Angel rumors, and what she thinks of Hugh's evil twins.

With a new $100 million dollar show underway in Vegas, you'd think Criss Angel could afford a shirt that closes ... or at least one with all its original parts. Like sleeves.

Fortunately, Criss managed to scrounge up enough cash for a full body wax.

Criss Angel and "American Gladiator" Wolf battled it out for douchebag outfit of the night at the Academy of Country Music Awards on Sunday.

Criss' women's fedora, sleeveless leather vest and ill-fitting jeans are accented beautifully by his guido jewelry. While Wolf's crushed velvet, sleeveless, double-breasted vampire coat dress thing and bootcut denim combo bring out the highlights in his fried, over-processed weave.

There is clearly no winner here.