James Franco dropped out of giving the UCLA graduation speech this year after a "scheduling conflict" -- and that whole falling asleep in class incident -- but this is what it would have sounded like. WARNING: Explicit language!
Thanks to FunnyorDie.com for giving Franco a forum to compare himself to the President, take credit for gay people becoming doctors and telling students to "go out and make babies."
After James Franco bailed on being UCLA's commencement speaker, the graduating class thought they found a back-up -- but the guy they picked is just a lil' too busy these days.
Almost 2,000 students signed up for a Facebook group dedicated to securing L.A.'s newest famous resident Conan O'Brien to replace Franco. But in an extremely polite statement to the students, Conan says he won't be able to fill Franco's shoes -- because he's too busy filling Leno's:
"I am honored to be asked but I am so busy launching "The Tonight Show" there just is not enough time to give this speech the preparation it deserves. I wish everyone in the class of 2009 the best and I am honored that they thought of me."
There's going to be quite a few happy students at UCLA today -- because James Franco has dropped out of giving the keynote speech at this year's graduation.
You'll remember back in March, a group of 200-something students launched a Facebook protest against Franco -- who graduated only a year earlier, was only an "average student," and fell asleep in class -- giving the big speech.
Franco said in a statement: "I deeply regret not being able to keep my commitment to giving the commencement speech at UCLA's graduation this year.
Unfortunately the date conflicts with me needing to be on location to begin pre-production on my next film. I wish everyone in the 2009 class the best of luck in all of their future endeavors."
He probably would have overslept and missed it anyway.
When James Franco wakes up from his mid-lecture nap at Columbia, he'll find out he's been selected to speak at the upcoming UCLA graduation ceremony -- and some of the students couldn't be more pissed off!!
Some bitter Bruins launched the "UCLA Students Against James Franco as Commencement Speaker" group on Facebook, attacking the actor's "wisdom" -- or lack thereof -- because he only graduated from the school last year.
The group, already 210 members strong, states "Clearly, this is ridiculous. Anyone who has been in his classes knows he is an average student." They also claim Franco lacks "the wisdom and perspective such a speaker is meant to provide the graduates."
At the end of their digi-rant, the group does throw Franco a bone, saying "He is a very talented actor, and clearly did well enough at UCLA to get into Columbia. We merely protest that he is not an appropriate choice for our graduation speaker."
We didn't call Franco for comment, because we didn't want to wake him up.
James Franco -- fired from the hit film "Knocked Up" after a fight with the director -- could it be so?
Not exactly. In the spoof video from FunnyOrDie.com, Franco ruins a scene by trying to improvise a story about a woman's dog getting run over by a car and gets into it with Judd Apatow -- all while Katherine Heigl and Kristen Wiig (not Kirsten, as James keeps calling her) look on in horror. He's probably just used to working with Kirsten Dunst.
The "fight" then inexplicably turns to "Freaks & Geeks" -- the cult TV show the two worked on nearly seven years ago -- and Franco apparently can't get over it. "You've done three 'Spider-Man' movies," Apatow yells at one point, "And you're mad about our f**king show that got cancelled after 12 episodes?!?"
Sienna Miller and her mom Jo donned the latest in Hawaiian hoedown chic while partying in Niagara Falls, Canada Monday night. The Millers danced the night away at a local casino and were joined by Sienna's "Camille" co-star - and rumored new beau- James Franco.
While the mom and daughter duo opted for matching green floral blouses and pink cowboy hats, James kept it cool in jeans and a blazer.
Sienna may have topped Vogue Magazine's Best Dressed list, but in this getup she has more in common with Anna Nicole than Anna Wintour.
Harvey Levin You're not the only one who thinks T.O. isn't doing that well this season... http://su.pr/5bNNfP
Tila Tequila RT: @lovenhate000 @officialtila beating a dead horse much? <===hahahha omg *cries of laughter*
Tila Tequila At least when u date @OfficialTila damn U will get nothing but LOVE & I love women too...sooo best Wifey Material right here! YAY BISEXUALS!
Tila Tequila And fellas...u dont wanna date a girl like @cocktailvh1 cuz she is so insecure with herself & jealous of other women. She will give u HELL!
Tila Tequila But like I said I like helping ppl and if me calling her out gives her more publicity...I AM OK WITH THAT! THE GIRL NEEDS HELP! @Cocktailvh1