Joey Lawrence vs. Jeff Timmons Who'd You Rather?

Buff, bronzed and hairless hunk Joey Lawrence made his Chippendales debut in Vegas this weekend ... a year after buff, bronzed and hairless former 98 Degrees member Jeff Timmons did his stint hosting the man stripper fest.

Question is ...

More Who'd you rather?

Joey Lawrence Whoa, I'm a Stripper!

EXCLUSIVE

Joey Lawrence is taking it all off ... or most of it at least ... because the 90s heartthrob just inked a deal with the man-stripper crew at Chippendales in Vegas.

A rep for the beefcake brigade tells TMZ, the 36-year-old former "Blossom" star will don the legendary bow tie ... and not much else ... for a special engagement at the Rio from June 7th-24th.

We're told Joey will sing, dance ... the "whole nine yards."

Joey's celebrity MC predecessors at the famed strip show include 98 Degrees singer Jeff Timmons and former "Bachelor" star Jake Pavelka.

It's unclear how much Lawrence is getting paid for the gig -- but in those parts, there's only one currency ... singles.

'Bachelor' Jake Pavelka I'm With Chippendales Now!

Hot Bodies

In his never-ending quest to avoid a real job, former "Bachelor" Jake Pavelka has signed a deal to become the next piece of man candy at Chippendales.

Jake will begin his stint at the Rio in Las Vegas on Feb. 23 and will serve as the celebrity MC ... just like former 98 Degrees singer Jeff Timmons and "Jersey Shore" star Ronnie Magro.

Sources tell us Jake's getting the VIP treatment ... with his very own dressing room -- but we're told he WILL NOT be wearing the signature Chippendales cuff and collar.

As for Jake's flesh exposure -- we're told he's not REQUIRED to drop top ... but he's jacked, so ... it's probably gonna happen.

Chippendales to Kris Humphries: We Can Heal You

Kris Humphries' divorce could be the best thing to ever happen to his career ... cause the out-of-work NBA star's been flooded with job offers ever since Kim K. dropped the hammer.

TMZ has learned ... Chippendales in Vegas has already reached out to Humphries, hoping to fill their empty celebrity MC spot at the Rio -- previously occupied by ex-98 Degrees singer Jeff Timmons.

A rep for the show tells us, " We figured since he was unemployed and, the soon-to-be ex-husband of Kim Kardashian, a gig at Chippendales might be the perfect job to help restore his faith in women."

And that's not all ... a dating website called LocalHotClassifieds.com claims it's willing to match Kris' salary on "Keeping Up With The Kardashians" if he'll agree to become their new spokesman.

No word if he'll take either of the gigs, but with hope for a 2011-12 NBA season fading away, it doesn't hurt to have options.

'Baywatch' Star Hammering Out a Deal With Chippendales

Ex-"Baywatch" star Jeremy Jackson is currently in a meeting with honchos at Chippendales in Las Vegas -- and we're told, both parties are trying to hash out a deal for the actor to join the bow-tied bunch on a full-time basis.

Jeremy's rep tells TMZ, the former child actor is on deck to fill an empty celebrity host spot ... following 98 Degrees singer Jeff Timmons -- but unlike Jeff's short stint ... this would be a long-term deal.

We're told Jeremy is extremely serious about the gig -- going to Vegas last weekend to try on the bow tie and shirt cuffs (above) just to get a feel for the experience.

And that's not it ... we're told Jeremy's also been working out non-stop to prep for the position -- and after entering "Celebrity Rehab" earlier this year for a hormone-injecting fitness addiction ... he's doing it ALL-NATURALLY.

We're told an announcement is expected to be made shortly.

'American Idol' Alum -- Flirting with Chippendales

With only weeks left in their deal with 98 Degrees singer Jeff Timmons, the honchos at Chippendales are hunting for a new celebrity MC -- and TMZ has learned they're very interested in one very hunky "Idol" alum.

Sources close to the club tell us -- "Idol" Season 5 finalist Ace Young visited the Chippendales at the Rio in Vegas recently ... and was SUPER interested in donning the famous bow tie and shirt cuffs.

According to sources, Young paid Chipps a visit to hang out with Timmons -- and to see how the whole guest-hosting thing works.

So far, there's no deal in place -- but it looks promising.

98 Degrees Stud Topless Chippendales Debut

Former 98 Degrees boy-bander Jeff Timmons made his half naked debut at Chippendales in Vegas last night ... but unfortunately for the crowd, the only piece of clothing he removed ... was his shirt.

98 Degrees Star No Stripping at Chippendales!!

Hold on to your singles ladies ... and gentlemen ... because ex-98 Degrees star Jeff Timmons says he WILL NOT be stripping down to his banana hammock during his upcoming Chippendales gig.

Timmons -- who's about to start a four week stint with the 'Dales crew in Vegas -- was out in L.A. yesterday, when he told us, "[The Chippendale regulars] don't even strip ... they're like trained dancers."

He adds, "The days of your grandma sticking dollar bills in a strippers G-string are over."

Grandma would be very disappointed.

A Half Naked Christmas Story

The only thing better than having an official Red Ryder carbine-action 200-shot range model air rifle with a compass in the shock and this thing which tells time: A Chippendales dancer under your tree.

Billy Jeffrey, who drops trou nightly at the Rio in Vegas, won a two night stay in the infamous home from "A Christmas Story" by dropping $4,200 in a charity auction -- and promptly started stripping inside the Cleveland pad.

Sure beats walking around in Ralphie's bunny jammies.

See Also

'Entourage' Star Hit Vegas Strip ... Joint

Rex Lee upgraded his "Entourage" this weekend -- and surrounded himself with the chiseled, waxed and abtastically tanned hunks of Chippendales.

Lee, who plays Lloyd on the HBO show, stopped by the all-male review Saturday night at the Rio in Vegas -- and from the looks of it, it was smooth sailing for all involved.

More Hot Shirtless Men

Val Bertinelli: Forget Jenny, Pass the Bread!

A very hot-looking Valerie Bertinelli was busted coming out of BLT Steak in West H-Wood last night -- and let's put it this way, wasn't eatin' four oz. of fish.

So we had our spies in the restaurant and here's the low down. Val went to the back room with a bunch of guys in suits for what looked like a business dinner. We couldn't see exactly what she was chokin' down, but on her way out she confessed to having a mouthful of meat. BTdubs, other items on the menu: popovers, potato gratin, bernaise and blue cheese sauce and the delectable peanut butter chocolate mousse.

In fairness, Val's on the Jenny Craig maintenance plan, which means she can occasionally chew the fat.

And speaking of maintenance, on her way out we asked Val what she thought of Priscilla Presley getting injected with motor oil. Response: Priceless. "This isn't a talk show, it's not Oprah." The irony is, it looked like Valerie was having a meeting with producers from her rumored upcoming talk show -- i.e., she wants to be Oprah!

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"Dancing" With Bruising and Swelling

The walking wounded over at "Dancing With the Stars" are toughing through their injuries -- so much so they are back to rehearsing for their band. Just because they have frequent tanning appointments doesn't mean they're not tough!

We're told Derek Hough -- who went to the hospital after hurting his neck in rehearsal on Tuesday -- is fine. In fact, he's headed down to the Audi dealership today to pick up his new A5.

Mark Ballas, who suffered a bruised nose after being accidentally head-butted by Julianne Hough, is already back to work.

Mark and Derek are gonna meet up today to practice for their an upcoming gig for their band, Almost Amy.

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What the Hell Happened to Your Body?!

Some of the biggest celebs in the Thirty Mile Zone are now unrecognizable, perhaps because of starvation, age, motor oil -- or all of the above. Take a look at the famous gone heinous, and please, don't judge.

Mouse Poop in Babwa's Prune Juice?

Diane Sawyer might want to take another look at her rice pilaf at lunch -- the ABC-Disney cafeteria in New York has a mouse problem, and we're not talkin' about Mickey!

That's what the NYC Health Department said in their last inspection of the joint, giving the ABC cafeteria 20 violations, including -- gag -- "evidence of mice or live mice present in facility's food and/or non-food areas," as TVNewser uncovers. NBC got cited for "food item spoiled ... contaminated or cross-contaminated" and CNN had "sanitized equipment" issues -- probably not referring to Anderson Cooper. (28 violations will get you shut down.)

FOX doesn't have a caf, so the staff eats at Wendy's in the basement. Guess what? The grease pit had less violations than any of the news commissaries. An ABC rep tells TMZ it's "looking into" the problem.

Matt Escapes Long Arm of Law: Free to Bong

Matt Leinart will not be charged with funneling alcohol to minors....even though there may be proof (as in 12 proof) to the contrary.

Pictures of Leinart surfaced earlier this week. Matty boy used his million dollar throwing arm to deliver a 12 oz. shot to the face -- the face of what appears to be a drunk chick. The question, is the beer bong-ee underage. Drinking age in Arizona is 21.

The Maricopa County Sheriff's office tells TMZ they are not investigating. They just don't wanna know if Matt's rat can legally drink. The Sheriff says pictures aren't enough to charge someone with a crime. Well, they could talk to the chicks ... we're just sayin'.

Lea Thompson: 'Memba Her?!

In the '80s, Lea Thompson became famous for starring in films like "Back to the Future" and "All the Right Moves." She then starred on the mediocre '90s TV series, "Caroline in the City." Guess what she looks like now!

Chippendales Do More Than Dance

Move over Pussycat Dolls, there's a new half naked group about to hit the music scene. The Chippendales! Apparently they can do more than follow choreographed routines -- these guys actually sing.

While there's no set release date for an album, we're told the recording process has already begun. The man with the bow tie that will be the lead singer of the group just happens to be Chippendales' Mr. March, Bryan Cheatham.

How deliciously convenient.

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