Heidi & Spencer

Don't say we didn't warn you.

TMZ has learned that Heidi Montag's attempted aural assault first single, called "Higher," is on its way in just a few short weeks, with a digital-only release on February 5 -- the same time that the video, produced by the Spencer Pratt, comes out. If you thought you'd heard quite enough on Ryan Seacrest's show ('memba that?), that wasn't really the single. Yes, that means there's more.

If anything, the single should be a fascinating tableaux of musical styles, as Heidi, in a release, cites such musical influences as Jesus, Theron Feemster (no, we didn't, either) and Britney Spears.

LC and buddy Audrina were completely engulfed by paps in a crowd of rowdy Goa wannagos last night, and while the walk to the bar was manic, the worst part was one girl who shouted, "I love Heidi!" as Lauren walked by. Awkward!

TMZ caught the villainous "Hills" twosome at Jet at the Mirage in Vegas, where they were all over each other, even though their wedding is off.

The only thing that would've made things worse: Heidi singing.

The question is: With that grin, and those eyes, is the name-check really necessary? Does anyone in the developed world not know who this man is?

Blasting a track from her meagerly-anticipated debut CD from her car outside of Koi, Heidi Montag did a very, very, loose Mariah Carey impression and failed miserably -- as Spencer could only watch in what can only be described as horror. "The Hills" are not alive with the sound of Heidi's soprano!

No word on whether her insistence on wailing at the wedding contributed to the event's cancellation.

An MTV insider tells us that America's favorite couple, Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag, have come to their collective senses and called off their impending nuptials (which were never going to happen anyway) ... for now. As for their relationship, they're still together ... for now. At least until season four!

What's that you say? We had you at Speidi?

Details, as they will no doubt say, to follow ...

The pair hugged and kissed as they perused the tree selection, while "Feliz Navidad" played in the background. Cue the fake snow! (And can someone please tell Heidi it's 75 degrees in LA. No scarf necessary.)

Do they live inside a snow globe, too?

Super-duper couple Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt were walking to their car Friday night, and if they thought it would be a quiet, romantic stroll through the streets of Santa Monica -- they were dead wrong.

Cameras snapped the gruesome twosome of Heidi and Spencer filming scenes of the fauxality show at LAX (the airport, not the club) on October 12. At first, all appears legit as Spencer is seen dropping off Heidi, appropriately enough, at the curb. But minutes (and a costume change) later, the douchebag duo shoot another scene, making it look like Heidi has just returned from visiting her folks in Colorado. Faster than the Concorde!

It's official: everything about Heidi and Spencer is a sham! Team Elodie.

A rep for MTV says "This was a pickup shot for continuity that in no way affected the storyline."

Heidi and her unlovable boyfriend, Spencer Pratt, filmed her new music video last week -- with Spencer as sole cameraman to save money -- and it was appropriately cheesy! Our favorite is the boom box. Nice touch Spence.

Montag did some of her signature spastic Mariah Carey-wannabe hand movements -- while dancing around on a jetty -- a lone fisherman completely ignoring them as they filmed. You'll have to wait your turn to be oblivious.

When we say the pair, we mean the pair. Just Heidi, Spencer -- and a hand-held camera. Apparently, the couple is trying to save money by shooting it themselves. No doubt one of Spencer's harebrained schemes.

While it pains to give props to Spencer, having Heidi roll around on the beach in a bikini was definitely a good idea.

If the flagrant photo ops don't make you sick, then maybe the glare of Heidi and Spencer's giant white Chiclet teeth will! Check out those chompers.

The "couple" is lending their "fame" to help raise awareness for World Hunger Relief Week, hosting a fundraiser at a Hollywood Taco Bell. For their support, Taco Bell is making a $10,000 donation to the World Food Programme, but did not agree to take the blame for spreading the rumors about L.C.'s sex tape.

Coincidentally, a hacker got into Heidi's personal site yesterday, posting a message as Heidi, claiming credit for inventing the L.C. sex tape rumors -- and now Spencer and Heidi are both trying to investigate who did the hacking.

Spencer tells us, "We've got Jack Bauer on it ... hopefully he'll be sober." Hilarious, Spence. Hilarious.

Behold the shiny, color coordinated and not so bright Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt. White Anglo-Saxon Fame Whores!