A Paris Hilton devotee, dressed in full pirate garb, is demanding the heiress' release from prison in the next three days, or else he will "raid, plunder and pillage the entire village of Lynwood." Sounds like someone is suffering from scurvy.
The pirate, replete with hook hand, conducted a 30-second "press conference" early Friday afternoon in front of the jail that houses the convicted celebutante. He then danced to the hit song "Crazy."
Sums it up perfectly.