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Does the Joker Have a Crooked Poker?

8/4/2007 2:30 PM PDT BY TMZ STAFF

So this is how Jack Nicholson keeps so many women on the hook! TMZ has exclusively learned that a new unauthorized biography on the joker suggests that Nicholson has a uniquely shaped member.

That's just one of the things revealed in "Five Easy Decades," the new unauthorized tell-all from author Dennis McDougal. Among the never-before revealed details: A self-portrait that Nicholson scrawled in pen, and photos of the hot tub in Nicholson's Hollywood Hills home. The hot tub is the infamous hot spot where "Chinatown" director Roman Polanski allegedly raped a 13-year-old girl more than thirty years ago.

The book also dishes on Jack's family secrets, and as reported in Page Six, his cadre of illegitimate children.


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Polanski pleaded guilty to statutory rape, that is not "allegedly".

2604 days ago



2604 days ago


if this is true, i hope the mother's of these kids are doing what they can to make sure they turn out to be decent, normal human beings. i know it would be hard to do with a dad like that. MOST hollywood types are after the attention for THEMSELVES. too bad if the consequences of their "ME!ME!ME!" actions get in the way. wait! they don't! they're just shipped away and paid to stay quiet! but i hope that he does take care of the KIDS and NOT the mom's! mom's get a damn job and stop waiting on some Prince Charming to come and save you. lazy ho bags trying to get something for nothing!

i've always wondered about the girl in the roman polanski case. was she a starcrossed kid who bragged about having sex with him and the adults in her life decided that what HE did was bad and went after this man to make HIM pay for it all? doesn't it take TWO to tango? what's her punishment for being a ho bag? oh wait! she's a victim! oh noes! at 13 you should know better! someone should put her in jail for trying to defraud/con him.

2604 days ago


Ummmm.... # 15 .... that's not what it's about.

2604 days ago

Zaza Sezit    

Wow! So there IS a reason for Jack's reputation...
He's an incredibly talented actor, and apparently he's incredibly talented in bed due to a bent rod...
FYI: It's probably natural because Peyronie's disorder would likely have resulted in ED long ago. Tonight I'll tell my Zack that we're not the only ones blessed by shape!

2604 days ago


Jack Nicholson is one of the most well-liked and most well-respected actors in L.A. It's no secret that Jack is a "lady's man",,,always was and probably always will be. And he's never pretended to be anything else. By the way, Nicholson was out of town when the incident between Polansky and the teenager occurred.

You're hitting below the belt on this one, TMZ.

2604 days ago


Remember Alex's remark about it in Witches of Eastwick? Maybe she knows from experience or mayb e he told her to say that or maybe it was just a coincidence.

2604 days ago

Only swim in the Ocean    

An unauthorized biography of a great American movie star has to stoop so low? Another example of the dumbing-down of America by sleaze merchants.

What about his artistic contribution to cinema? That alone could fill volumes if written by a decent, well-educated person.

2603 days ago


He had to have something good about him. He isn't good looking!!!!!!!!!!

2603 days ago


Just for the record: Roman Polanski was convicted of raping a 13 year old, that's why he fled the country and has been living in Europe. No "allegedly" about it. Only thing more revoltintg than a child rapist is an industry that would give a convicted rapist an Oscar. He couldn't come here to accept it or he would be arrested on the spot. DISGUSTING!!!

2603 days ago


A happy rich sleezebag!

2603 days ago


as someone who has acted in a movie with jack, he is a VERY dark guy who enjoys humiliating women. He is WAY beyond a creep

2603 days ago

Charles Almon    

Eddie Murphy also has a crooked ding dong (he told Playboy years ago) AND also has bastards. Maybe they go hand in hand. Tho hand in ding dong would have prevented the bastards.

2603 days ago


Jack is the best!!!! no matter what..he is every way...a great actor and a REAL human being...most men would LOVE to be what he is..and be with the woman he associates with for sure...most mens dreams come true...keep it up are doing just fine!!!!

2603 days ago


Jack Nicholson has artistic talent too. That portrait of himself is great.

2603 days ago
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