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TMZ broke the story yesterday that the dysfunctional clan known as Britney, Kevin, Sean Preston and Jayden James all have pink eye. So what, you may ask, is pinkeye?
While so-called "doctors" might tell you it is an inflammation of the conjunctiva, typically caused by an allergic reaction or infection, TMZ got the down low from, where else, TV and movies!
According to the film "Knocked Up," pinkeye is caused "when poop particles make their way into your ocular cavities," adding that it can occur when you "fart bare-assed onto another person's pillow," often done as a practical joke.
Meanwhile, one of the side effects of pinkeye, according to "South Park," is a desire to travel around in packs, eating the brains of other people.
If you or someone you know has been afflicted with pinkeye, please rent "Knocked Up," or season one of "South Park." Antibiotic eye drops may also be used, but aren't nearly as funny.
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Reader Comments
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The only dysfunctional clan here is TMZ lead by A-hole Harvey.
Damn...I was not first!! Who cares about Pink Eye...WHy didn"t she go to court?!!
Y'all are idiots. And I say "y'all", not as a spoof on Britney, but because I caught it from my boyfriend, who is from Texas.
I'm a clean girl...take 3 showers a day, yet I've had pink eye. Pink eye is traditionally caused, not by crap or traditional bacteria, it's caused by outdated make-up and, in my case, overwearing your contacts. I would keep my contacts in for upwards of 3 weeks without removing them (because I teared up profusely everytime I tried to put them back in ). As a result, I didn't clean the contacts on a daily basis like other and the result was that I got pink eye.
We all know you're making a big deal out of this very common inflammation to make the Spears clan look like dirty unhygenic people, to jive with the rumors (Brit walking around barefoot and having stinky feet), but honestly, pink eye happens to the cleanest of people and I hope people realize that.
you should wash your hands after you wipe and put in contacts - poop eye!
RE Posted at 1:33PM on Oct 11th 2007 by Kelly
Chick you are way too sensitive about you're pink eye.
And what's with all the showers? isn't that a bit excessive?
IF YOU HAVE ANY BRAINS, YOU WOULD KNOW THAT NEITHER OF THE PARTIES SHOULD BE AT COURT SPREADING CONJUNCTIVITIS.
maybe just maybe the kids picked up pinkeye just like all children do at some point.....its not caused by poop....its more like not washing hands.
everyone gets that sooner or later....
I have had pink eye too and there is nothing unsanitary about me or my habits. How dare you make fun of those poor kids having a very uncomfortable ailment?
Well gee TMZ, you would think since you follow her every move you could produce a picture of her "pink eye" to support your claim. Every pic I have seen, she DOESNT HAVE PINK EYE.
You are getting do desperate for a story you are manufacturing them.
