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Parenting Coach to Britney: I'm Not a Potted Plant!

10/23/2007 2:06 PM PDT BY TMZ STAFF

TMZ has learned Britney Spears' parenting coach has submitted her report to the court, and it ain't pretty.

Sources say the two-and-a-half page report says Britney totally ignored the coach -- didn't even acknowledge her presence. The coach says she was unable to teach Britney anything, because Spears didn't want to listen.

The report, which was presented to the court yesterday and will be critical in determining if Spears should regain 50/50 custody, concludes that Britney often ignores her kids and lives in her own little world -- that Britney often disappeared and wasn't around the kids or the coach. We're told the coach has said Brit spends a lot of time on the phone and changing clothes.










And on another note y'all, that BritBrit paparazzo sock is still up for grabs on eBay!

bid on the sock



Why FBI May Have Seized Copperfield's Stuff



David Copperfield is under the FBI microscope, and now TMZ may know why.

Last week, the FBI raided Copperfield's Las Vegas warehouse and seized digital camera equipment and a hard drive to a computer -- this, after a Seattle woman accused Copperfield of sexually assaulting her in the Bahamas.

Sources now tell TMZ Copperfield designed part of his show around "a system for picking up women." During his show, David goes into the audience and chooses women to come on stage. We're told that if David likes a girl, he'll use code words with assistants like "mama" and "secrecy." The assistants mark the women on a map of the inside of the Hollywood Theater at MGM Grand. After the show, the women are brought backstage -- and that's where the profiling begins.

The women are told that David may use them in his show when he comes to their hometown. They are then photographed with a digital camera, asked questions like, "What is your favorite men's cologne?" and "Where do you like to vacation?" We're told one of those vacation spots mentioned by staff is the Bahamas, where the accuser claims she was assaulted. Copperfield owns a cluster of islands in the Bahamas -- which he bought for $50 million.

This may explain the FBI's interest in David's camera system and hard drive. If the accuser is a woman who was brought on stage, the FBI would be interested in a possible M.O.

Copperfield's attorney re-issued his earlier statement in response to this story: "It is important these allegations be put into perspective. An unidentified woman has made serious allegations against David Copperfield. Although authorities have not revealed her identity to us, we know these allegations are false because David Copperfield has never forced himself on anyone."

Anderson Cooper: Armed and Fabulous



CNN golden boy Anderson Cooper is blowin' up -- literally!
Anderson Cooper
The 40-year-old news hottie showed up to a NYC screening of "Planet in Peril" this weekend, looking extra fit and buff. Check out those guns!

360 is not only the name of Coop's program -- it's also what he benches. Lift with the knees, Andy!



Heidi Montag on the Cheap


Heidi Montag: Click to watchUsually, the sight of a bikini-clad sexy blonde writhing around in the wet sand is hot ... somehow, Heidi Montag makes it ... hilarious.

Heidi and her unlovable boyfriend, Spencer Pratt, filmed her new music video last week -- with Spencer as sole cameraman to save money -- and it was appropriately cheesy! Our favorite is the boom box. Nice touch Spence.

Montag did some of her signature spastic Mariah Carey-wannabe hand movements -- while dancing around on a jetty -- a lone fisherman completely ignoring them as they filmed. You'll have to wait your turn to be oblivious.


COMMENTS

No Avatar
16.

Mareike    

When i was little i used to love Brittney! I don't love her that much today but she is a good singer! And everyone calling her fat.......How bout u just fucl( off! Brittney is only a so called bad mother bc of all the ppl telling her she is a bad mother!

2520 days ago
17.

Lyn    

TMZ is a disgusting rag like the Enquirer & the Globe. What satisfaction, other than greed, do they get in tearing people's lives apart.

2520 days ago
18.

Sharon    

She gets more attention being a bad parent and it's not something to be proud of. Just don't fall into the game by giving her attention at all. Without publicity, maybe she'll go away.

2520 days ago
19.

observing    

i'm sorry, but britney flat out has mental problems. yes, the media DOES hound her to the point of harassment, but that doesn`t account for how not-right she still acts even when they aren`t around. and that`s a too dangerous way for her to be, to be so-called caring for two small children. geez.

2520 days ago
20.

Amanda    

Brittney Spears shouldnt of even had kids to begin with ... if you cant take care of them (which she CANT) why even have them?! Shes nothing but a self-centered little bitch who only wants the attention. Shes not all that great/big like she was back then ... she doesnt be herself ... she just changes everything about her just to fit in with everyone else ... ITS NOT WORKING ... well maybe it is because everyone keeps giving her the attention. Take her kids off of her and DONT give them back then just stop and leave her alone!! ITS SIMPLE!

2520 days ago
21.

ella    

she is just fine ,going to hard times after her divorce ,
stop been so hard on her and enjoy the music

2520 days ago
22.

Michele    

I sure couldn't handle having some complete stranger live with me or have to be around me all the time with my kids, analyzing every move I made.....I might give them the silent treatment too!

2520 days ago
23.

HAROLD PRATT    

WHAT IS SHE DOING DRIVING?? AND WITH THOSE KIDS IN THE CAR?? DIS SHE BUY HER WAY OUT OF THAT HIT-AN-RUN//? AND DRUNK DRIVING ?????????????

2520 days ago
24.

Freebyrd    

OMG. Brit WANTS the attention from the media. It keeps her in the limelight. She CRAVES the attention - that's why she goes out each day no matter what, into the public places. She's nuts. She doesn't care about her kids.

2520 days ago
25.

Taylor    

If Britney isn't even capable of being on her best behavior when a "parenting coach" is present, then something is terribly wrong and those kids DO NOT BELONG IN HER CARE! It's not even a matter of her being so pathetic anymore, its freaking scary that she is allowed any time with them..My heart breaks for those kids..Never thought I'd side with KFED, but they are surely better off with him...

2520 days ago
26.

LMB    

If you think driving with a cup in one hand is dangerous, wait until Britney's plastic Halloween pumpkins, displayed across the dashboard of her car, go flying into her lap! Then what will she steer with?

2520 days ago
27.

THE BOSS    

SHE MUST HAVE OCD, CHANGING UP CLOTHES ALL THE TIME TRYING TO FEEL GOOD ABOUT YOURSELF....AND THE WAY YOU LOOK. SHE NEEDS HELP EAL QUICK!!

2520 days ago
28.

LA DAD    

having been through this cra p myself. court appointed "parenting coaches" are bias and will slame you. Brittney never had a chance. I am sure if Brinntey gave her kid a piece of candy the report would have said something bad about that.
Once the court gets involved with your kids only the kids lose,

2520 days ago
29.

HuggeeBear    

How did this information from the "court-appointed" parenting couch become public? Children's records are sealed, so is this woman yakking to the media? If she is, she will lose her license and be fired. She isn't there to spread her opinions to the media, she works for the courts. I think this needs to be investigated.

2520 days ago
30.

Tim    

Oh,, I just long for the day when we say Brittney who???? It is sooooo close and yet soooo far away. Think back to the day with Streisand, Ross, Franklin, I could go on and on and on,, Ladys who had class and who COULD sing, We did not have all this. I am not saying the ladys did not do anything wrong but must have played it smart.

timspradlinmusic.com

2520 days ago
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