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Comedian Ralphie May

Weed Nearly Killed Me!

1/19/2012 3:30 AM PST BY TMZ STAFF

comedian Ralphie May
"Last Comic Standing" finalist and outspoken weed advocate Ralphie May is finally calling it quits on the sticky icky -- telling TMZ, smoking marijuana nearly killed him last year ... so he's giving it up for good.

May tells us, he was diagnosed with walking pneumonia before taking a cruise last November -- but the condition quickly got worse ... and before long, he was holed up in the boat's infirmary with a life-threatening lung infection.

May tells us, "If I hadn't been a 20-year weed smoker, it wouldn't have been as bad."

You'll recall -- May was detained in a Guam airport back in 2010 for weed possession after the comic decided to pet a drug-sniffing dog. Not his brightest moment.

May says he used to smoke around 4 ounces of pot a WEEK, but "feels great" ever since he quit -- adding, "I had a great time doing it, but now I can pet every dog in Guam."


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Previous 15 Comments | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7


if you werent such a fat ass this wouldnt be so bad moron

976 days ago


4 ounces a week my a**. He's lying about that and that he's going to stop. He isn't. So instead he may want to try to lose some of that flab. That's more of a health issue than anything else he's doing.

976 days ago


His problem isn't pot but food...

975 days ago


In the 5,000 plus years of do***ented Cannabis use there are ZERO deaths attributed directly to it's usage. As Jack Herer said, the only deaths from Cannabis have come at the hands of the Government. That includes the violence that is associated with it's sale because the Government has decided that it is illegal.
Is smoking 1/4 pound of Cannabis a week good for you? I doubt it, but it won't kill you.
Look I have weight issues as do so many Americans.
Not to be mean about this, but looking at him, I'm pretty sure that there are other reasons for his health issues. Cannabis is obviously a scapegoat for him and I'm sure it's easier for him to blame it than face the real culprit and the emotional baggage that comes with it. Maybe he has a point in some way in that quitting smoking could help him control his appetite more efficiently and get him off the couch. His problem is not smoking Cannabis, it's self control. If he wants to live much past his 40's it's not Cannabis that he should be cutting back on.

974 days ago

No Shit Bob.    

Duh! your not meant to breath any kind of smoke.

970 days ago

Kelly In OKC    

Hey dumbass, it wasn't pot that "nearly killed you"! It was YOUR inability to NOT ABUSE DRUGS! Who the **** smokes FOUR OUNCES A WEEK? No one. You BUY four ounces a week then smoke it with friends or in joints that keep burning while you aren't smoking.
To TRULY smoke 4oz/week BY YOURSELF you have 2 choices: smoke ****ty weed that doesn't get you very high or smoke so much pot that your tolerance level is "beyond Tommy Chong" level.
It's cool Ralphie. I'm sure the extra 200-300 pounds of fat around your lungs didn't keep them from functioning properly causing the pneumonia!
"he was diagnosed with walking pneumonia before taking a cruise last November -- but the condition quickly got worse"
My guess is the doctor who diagnosed him said "DON'T SMOKE" then he did anyway. Doctors can only explain **** to you. They can't understand it for you. Dumbass.
I'm glad to not have him as a spokeperson for pot. He doesn't help.

958 days ago

Roc Maven    

We love Ralphie may. He is mad funny. Me and pals are going to see Ralphie at Watseka Theatre in Watseka Illinois on June 15.

847 days ago


So funny.

Friends site

693 days ago


Yeah, blame the weed, not the common and life-threatening lung problems which commonly go along with being morbidly obese. And who goes on a cruise with walking pneumonia? How stupid is this guy? Walking pneumonia is highly contagious and yet this idiot goes on a cruise where everybody is packed together in a confined environment. What a douche.

And for the record, Ralphie, long-term pot smokers statistically have a larger lung capacity than non pot-smokers, so the weed may actually have saved your life by allowing your lungs to still get oxygen to that fat-laden heart of yours.

346 days ago
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