Chris Brown Action Hero Attorney Launches Get Out of Jail Plan

3/20/2014 4:05 PM PDT

Chris Brown is like a damsel in distress, and his attorney Mark Geragos is like the swashbuckling hero swooping in -- Indy style -- to save him from a pit of snakes ... or a month in jail.

Seriously, if Geragos pulls off this miracle -- Chris better hook up the fedora and whip.