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Prince Von A-Hole Faces Der Kommissar

4/9/2008 5:22 PM PDT BY TMZ STAFF

We are LIVE in the courtroom where Prince Von A-Hole's battery trial is about to begin. The Prince, who was repping himself but just hired a lawyer, is being sued for allegedly beating up a paparazzo in 2005.


Photog Dirk Smeten says the faux royal assaulted him as he wheeled Zsa Zsa in to a Beverly Hills hair salon. Smeten is suing him for thousands of Zsa Zsa'a money.

Von A-Hole is scheduled to testify and we're told Zsa Zsa herself is supposed to appear.

Court TV, eat your heart out!

UPDATE 2:51 PM And that's all for today, folks. See you tomorrow at 9:15 AM PST.

UPDATE 2:46 PM There was a criminal investigation filed against A-Hole and when he was asked if he hit the photog - he said, "no." "

UPDATE 2:28 PM
OMG. He's in such trouble. He just testified "She's not so skinny anymore" and that it takes a good amount of time to schlep her out of the car.

UPDATE 2:25 PM HOLY CRAP! HE JUST SAID ZSA ZSA IS 98!

UPDATE 2:24 PM
A-Hole is recounting how he is a doting husband to Zsa Zsa Gabor - who is in a wheelchair and victim of a stroke.

UPDATE 2:20 PM
The plaintiff has rested. Von A-Hole is taking the stand!!!!!!

UPDATE 2:17 PM
Smeten's lawyer has recalled him to the stand, for a little rehab!

UPDATE 2:07 PM BHPD Detective Robert Hernandez is testifying on behalf of the photog.

UPDATE 2:01 PM PST:
Smeten, in addition to being a pap, is a physical therapist with a private practice in Beverly Hills. Von Anhalt's attorney is arguing that Smeten lied when he testified he doesn't really know what treatments he received. HELLO -- HE'S A PHYSICAL THERAPIST!

UPDATE 1:56 PM PST:
Smeten gives the low down on all his medical treatments

UPDATE 1:47 PM PST:
The photog is watching the video of himself getting his ass beat by Von A-Hole.

UPDATE 11:57 AM PST:
Here we go again with more neck pain questions. Meanwhile, Von A-Hole looks like he wants to wring this guy's neck.

UPDATE 11:50 AM PST
: Smeten blames being in shock for the inconsistency of his testimony.

UPDATE 11:48 AM PST:
What a pain in the neck! They lawyer wants to know exactly when the photog first felt pain.

UPDATE 11:44 AM PST:
Smeten testified "He hit me again and again and again. It was so bad I was in a shock."
UPDATE 11:28 AM PST: The lawyer just accused Smeten of telling A-Hole that his wife, Zsa Zsa "looks dead already" when he saw the two out that day. Lawyer also claims Smeten called A-Hole a Nazi and a gigolo. Gigolo - that guy??

UPDATE 11:18 AM PST: Plaintiff Dirk Smeten is on the stand, testifying about how he got his ass kicked by A-Hole.

UPDATE 10:41 AM PST: Judge calls for a 15 minute break. Grab some chips and use the facilities!

UPDATE10:21 AM PST: The doc is getting grilled on the photog having a headache. Courtroom is slipping into a coma. Get on with it already!

UPDATE
10:17 AM PST: The photog's lawyers say Von A-Hole packs a mean punch, to the tune of $16k in Rx bills.

UPDATE 9:07 AM PST : His lawyers just complained about the cameras in the courtroom and the judge D-listed Von A-hole, saying he's had way bigger stars in his court than the Prince!


130 COMMENTS

No Avatar
46.

Mrs Joe Jackson    

"1. first
Posted at 11:35AM on Apr 9th 2008 by ck" .......... First with absolutely nothing to
add to anyone's life. Talk about A-Holes.

I love Prince Von AHole... he is the best.

2297 days ago
47.

TMZSUCKS!    

As much as I believe that we watch TMZ because of the hard work of papz, they can be a pain sometimes.
The video clearly shows the Von A-hole was simply trying to shoo him away. What the hell is this circus all about?
Leave the prince alone. LEAVE THE PRINCE ALONE!!! TMZ , you're nothing without PRINCE VON A-HOLE!!!!!

2297 days ago
48.

susie    

here we go again...greed....if u have money.watch out......hope the prince wins...

2297 days ago
49.

not a homophobe    

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

2297 days ago
50.

MJ    

I find it rather amusing (and a little hypocritical) when programs, websites, etc, complain about how worthless a so-called celebrity is but they devote a significant amount of space, air-time, etc to that same celebrity. Maybe if everyone stopped talking/writing about them, they would go away.

2297 days ago
51.

susie    

get real...the case should be thrown out of court...the plaintiff should have to pay a fine and pay defendents lawyer bill..u can see on the tape he was not hurt....i call this a form of fraud...

2297 days ago
52.

me    

It sounds like the pap is trying to blame all his ailments on Von A-hole! So far we have: Headaches, high blood pressure, hemmoriods, under eye bags, crows feet, man boobs, athletes foot, irritable bowel syndrome, bi-polar disorder, diabetes, erectile disfunction and cold sore.

2297 days ago
53.

good grief!    

Someone needs to object or something!! We get it he had a headache so what??!! I'm getting a headache now just by hearing the same thing over and over again!!!!

hmm, could I file legal papers, as well, against this "lawyer" for repeating himself????

2297 days ago
54.

Jen    

BTW- Court Tv is now TruTv....

2297 days ago
55.

susie    

can i sue tmz for having cameras in the courtroom...im getting a back pain from watching this...lets see maybe 2 million bucks will make me feel better......................

2297 days ago
56.

Area 51    

"so" (#51): I think you left out dandruff and jock itch.

2297 days ago
57.

fergie pissed her pants    

suck my nuts #42 and while your at it my a hole too!

2297 days ago
58.

annoyed    

"Trial of the Century" ??????

You gotta be kidding me. I knew the writing here was pretty bad but this is just ridiculous. Whover made that title up needs to find a new job.

2297 days ago
59.

annoyed    

I cant believe there is actually anyone out there who really cares about this.

2297 days ago
60.

good grief!    

awkward!!! I thought it was a court room, whats with the chick in the red dress??!! I wonder if she won some sort of contest for a day she got "lucky"!!.. lol

2297 days ago
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