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Madge Wants No Mercy from Africa

8/14/2008 7:12 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF

OK, all together now: Madonna is not, repeat not, adding another African baby to her Kabbalabrood.

The tabs were poppin' yesterday that Madge had become mama to a little girl from Malawi, a three-year-old girl named Mercy James. A Malawian adoption minister was quoted in a Brit paper saying that Madge's people were visiting the girl. "Madonna has not made an attempt to adopt this baby earlier this year or now," said Madonna's mouthpiece to Us.

But let's review – didn't she say the same thing about David Banda way back when? We'd keep an eye on this one.

So Was It Jen Who Dropped the Ax?


Not since the Warren Commission have there been so many conspiracy theories bandied about.

And if it wasn't the dog Norman that broke up Jen Aniston and John Mayer, then perhaps it was Jen that pulled the trigger on the pairing. "She finds him funny, sexy, and very talented," says an Aniston pal to the Chicago Sun-Times. But in the end, Jen wanted "stability and loyalty" in a relationship, and so it had to end with JM.

Yesterday, we tried to suss out how Johnnifer went to the dogs.

K-Fed Feasting His Eyes on a New Brit


It worked out pretty well for him the first time, so could Kevin Federline be hunting for another Britney?

Federleeze was at Coco de Ville the other night, reports the New York Post, and was caught "staring at Brittny Gastineau while she was waiting in line for the bathroom" – always the most attractive image of a woman. But even after the vowel-challenged sublebrity did her thing, K-Fed "wouldn't stop checking her out, up and down."

Too bad for the Fedz: Apparently she wasn't interested.

Party Favors: Someone Actually Wants Affleck's Sweaty Suit ... Southfork Ranch Revived ... Julia Child Was a Spy


Somewhere, clearly, the economy is not in the crapper: A guy with way too much money bought the suit that Ben Affleck wore in "Daredevil" for $60,000 on LiveAuctioneers.com. No word on whether the stench of suckiness was removed from the suit before sale. ... J.R., Sue Ellen, Bobby, and the rest of the Ewing clan will be getting together in November for a reunion celebrating the 30th anniversary of the show. ... Julia Child worked for the OSS, as we all know, and in her application for the job, as newly-released files reveal, she was worried about her "impulsiveness."

24 COMMENTS

No Avatar
1.

80881    

You're still a dirt-bag. Loser!

2073 days ago
2.

ilovesienna    

first and Jen Aniston wish she will just settle down with somebody you will think she is a commitment phobic since Brad Pitt

2073 days ago
3.

Obama Hussein Barak is the Anti-Christ    

#2, hope that directed at k-shiit - he is the dirtbag loser!!! why isn't he home with the kids??? that is what all of the haters would be saying if britney had custody and was seen out of the house.

2073 days ago
4.

HOLY CROCODILE    

Is this Gastineau any kin to Mark ? If so this guy better watch out. Mark will chew him up and spit him out.

2073 days ago
5.

ohcomeon    


She should have known with John Mayers track record. Did she honestly think she could change this leopards spots? He likes the unattainable and once attained he's on to the next. There will never be stability and loyality with this idiot. It's a sickness.

2073 days ago
6.

midge    

Julianne Hough watch out..Mayer might be coming for you next.

2073 days ago
7.

Mr. Know It All    

#3, yes.........that is Mark's daughter, leader of the New York Sack Exchange. She's not that stupid.......K-f*ck is a punk!

Maybe he should try his luck with the daughter of another big man, Hulk Hogan. I think they would make a great couple!

2073 days ago
8.

Kay    

Jennifer was never serious about John. You meet new people by going out, not by hanging with girlfriends. She's finally doing that, so she must be ready to find the right guy.

2072 days ago
9.

rosie    

To #3 ANOKIE, Mark Gastineau is Brittny's father but I seriously doubt he cares what happens to his daughter. He left her and her mother when Brittny was just a child for Sylvester Stallone's wife, the giant Bridget. He literally threw his career and family down the tubes. Brittny's mother Lisa raised her and Brittny has had little to no contact with Mark. Besides, what makes you think gastineau is so tough? He got the crap beat out of him in his ill fated decision to become a boxer. End of story! Hopefully Federline's run of luck as a gigalo has come to an end.

2072 days ago
10.

megn    

Oh, my. Jennifer's spin doctors are busy at work. Just like always. From the pictures of them together you could see she was mad about the boy. I think it is obvious who was the dumper and who was the dumpee. Jennifer is always the dumpee. But here comes the endless b.s. Her people earning their money.

2072 days ago
11.

Seattlelite    

I don't think any girl in her right mind would have anything to do with K-Fed. He is nothing but disgustingly creepy.

2072 days ago
12.

J.D.    

I think the older Madonna gets the stranger she gets and she is trying what ever she can to get back in the spot light again! She is getting as bad as Rosie Odonnel any more to get into the spot light!!!!!!!!!!! If you notice like Rosie she is useing kids to do it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2072 days ago
13.

Daisy    

OK guys, I know some of you think she's cute, but that VaJJ is just tooo stretched out. Blech. Also it shows why Brad dumped her azzzzzz. She can't commit to anything, let alone kids.

On Madge. Has Malawi gotten any press on serious and relevant issues, ever? No wonder they like this hag.

2072 days ago
14.

Fred    

Hey K-Fed, how does it feel to be under the microscope? In time Brit's lawyers and private investigators will catch you doing something tht will cost you your free ride on the backs of those kids.

2072 days ago
15.

name withheld    

that would be a lovely pairing. it is so fun to watch a stuck up bitch get turned humble by a good trashing in the sack

2072 days ago
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