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Arnold and Maria's Split -- A Long Time Coming

5/10/2011 5:16 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF

Maria Shriver has been "miserable" in her marriage for a long, long time, sources connected with the couple tell TMZ ... and it's all about Arnold Schwarzenegger's "craziness."

Arnold Schwarzenegger Divorce

We're told Maria moved out of the couple's L.A. mansion months ago.  Sources tell us she's been extremely unhappy in her marriage for years, complaining about Arnold's out of control ego, as well as his womanizing.

We're also told Maria feels Arnold has ignored her for years and she's felt terribly unappreciated.

Sources say the couple has spent "very little time together" for several years.  Maria was frequently absent from Sacramento while Arnold was Governor. 

The situation got worse once Arnold left office and decided he wanted to resurrect his movie career.  Maria felt Arnold was becoming more erratic -- more "unstable." 

Our sources say Maria's religious views caused her deep distress over whether to split and/or divorce.   As one source put it: "She's been a lost soul for a long time."


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Maria -- Contemplated Divorce for Nearly 2 Years


Maria Shriver has been deciding whether to DIVORCE Arnold Schwarzenegger since 2009 ... but sources with direct knowledge tell TMZ, she's been "extremely conflicted."

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We're told Maria has been unhappy with Arnold for years ... and first planned to split with him back in 2009 ... but her mother passed away and Maria decided to hold off.

Then, we're told, Maria wanted to try to break it off again in January 2011 ... but her father died ... once again putting the split on hold.

Our source tells us Maria is fed up with Arnold's infidelities ... coupled with the fact he's been "impossible" to live with. We're told Maria's kids acknowledge the issues -- and have pushed their mother to call off the marriage.

People who have spoken with Maria tell us ... despite her STRONG public persona, Maria has become a "shell of the woman" she appears to be because she is "terrified" of Arnold ... but in an emotional, not a  physical way.

However, once Maria finally decided to separate from Arnold  -- and moved into a fancy Beverly Hills hotel -- we're told Arnold pulled a 180 ... and he's been "working extremely hard" to win her back.  As one source says, "He could not be sweeter now that she's left him."

To make things even more complicated, Arnold and Maria have been spending LOTS of time together lately ... hanging out during Easter, Mother's Day and even their 25th anniversary ... which they celebrated together at an expensive hotel.

A source close to the couple tells us ... despite their differences, Arnold and Maria have "serious chemistry between them" ... which is why she has such ambivalence about the break-up.

But ambivalence aside, Maria has been "miserable" in the marriage and has taken a big step to end the relationship.


Arnold Schwarzenegger -- The Ring Disappears


Hours before the world knew about his separation ... Arnold Schwarzenegger broke out his street bike and went for a ride with his bodyguard in L.A. yesterday ... sans wedding ring.

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But Arnold WAS wearing his ring on Sunday ... the day before the couple announced their split.

Meanwhile, Maria Shriver has been ringless since mid-March ... right after Maria posted a cryptic video on YouTube asking her fans for advice on how to "transition" into the next phase of her life.051011_maria_shriver_still



As you already know, Arnold and Maria announced their separation last night ... and in their statement, they claimed they've been living apart for several weeks.


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With stars of the film Johnny Depp, Penelope Cruz, Geoffrey Rush and Ian McShane on the carpet, fans got an eyeful of A-list talent. In fact, Depp barely talked to reporters -- and spent most of his time signing autographs for almost every fan there!


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The annual horse race brought a lot of celebs to Churchill Downs and a lot of wild headgear with them.

Kate Gosselin, Erin Andrews, Marisa Miller and even Tom Brady were seen in their Derby best, check out the gallery of sightings above!


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Julianne Hough Goes Two Pieces!


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Beachin' bod!


Whose '80s Hair?!


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Hair-larious.


Celeb Hair -- A Cut Above the Rest


Lookin' good doesn't always come easy -- check out which follicly friendly stars put in the groundwork by spending hours at the salon ... 

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Celebrity Scramble!


Can you guess whose perfect picture was given an awful celebrity scramblin'?!

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419 COMMENTS

No Avatar
361.

Errin    

Guess she found out that all those sexual assault victims weren't lying!

1229 days ago
362.

Steve    

Right!!! A Kennedy calling someone unstable. hahahahahahahaha

1229 days ago
363.

Leona    

The biggest marriage problem in this country is not so much men's infidelity. It's the erronious expections women in this culture go into marriage with. They are unfortunately unrealistic. People in general are not monogamous by nature and staying faithful to one person is often a real struggle.

1229 days ago
364.

JON     

MARIA NEW WHO ARNOLD WAS BEFORE SHE MET HIM. SHE NEW ARNOLD
HAD A HUGE EGO AND I WOULD BET THAT WAS ONE OF THE REASONS WHY SHE WAS ATRACTED TO HIM. KNOW SHE SAYS ARNOLDS EGO IS A HUGE PROBLUM HES DOESNT PAY ANY ATTENTION TO ME. MARIA YOUR FROM THE KENNEDY CLAN HOW MUCH ATTENTION DID THE KENNEDIE MEN PAY TO THEIR WIVES. HOW MANY KENNEDIES SCREWED ANYTHING THAT WOULD SPREAD THEIR LEGS. IF MARIA THINKS HER LIFE WILL BE HAPPIER AFTER SHE LEAVES ARNOLD SHES CRAZY. AS SPECIALLY WHEN SHE HAS HIS CHILDREN, ALL SHE IS DOING BY DEVORCING ARNOLD IS MAKING IT EVEN MORE DIFFICULT FOR HERSELF ARNOLD AND AS SPECIALLY THEIR CHILDREN. MARIA IS A SHELFISH SELF CENTERED BITCH. ARNIE PAY ATTENTION TO ME PAY ATTENTION TO ME IM LONELIE PAY ATTENTION TO ME. ITS TIME FOR MARIA TO GROW UP.

1229 days ago
365.

caliallye    

A note just before: When I lived in Paris in 1969, I was introduced to your mother. I was at a dinner that she had, curtesy of Countess Marie Tolstoy, with whom I resided while at the American College in Paris. I really don't remember the occasion, but it probably had something to do with the the astronauts and the moon landing, since Countess Tolstoy was very proud of having met all of them. It has remained a highlight of that year. She was very warm and kind to this very young college freshman.

I do not read the tabloids. But I already guessed what the problem was. It's so often the women's problem: chemistry with someone who just can't manage their ego, the other women, the needing the accolades.

We do knowthat you already know the solutions:

!. Have something you MUST do! a project, chidden, etc.

2. Keep friends close.

3. PAY ATTENTION TO YOUR HEALTH! This should really be number one.

I unfortunately, have some severe problems stemming from a broken back, and this makes it VERY hard to get out and do things. You have not been looking healthy for a very long time. No one deserves having to "put up with" the stress of having someone you trusted betray you, especially repeatedly. We can laugh it off, realize that there is no one but yourself who would put up with this stuff from the guy, etc. (I tried not to laugh, or cry, at "I'm 63 years old. I should be able to do what I want to!")

But it all affects our HEALTH! Unlike me, you have support, you have family, and you have the money necessary to get things done. SO GET YOURSELF WELL, and get back to doing the things you love doing. YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

1229 days ago
366.

teltech543    

Probably just wants to trade up to a newer model like all men.

1229 days ago
367.

Joan    

OK, you've told us her side. How about airing his?

1229 days ago
368.

Curly    

Arnold, dump the little scrawny pinch-faced harpie.

Those wrinkle lines are not beautiful smile wrinkles, those are bone-mean manic depressive drag you into my depression war lines.

What did you expect marrying into the crime-ridden democratic Kennedy clan

1229 days ago
369.

They need beatins    

Who cares. the roid raging nazi dropped the skin and bones skeletor kennedy. Boo hoo. She definitly needs to eat. How can she think that looks good. wah wah wah.

1229 days ago
370.

Deborah    

I don't like Maria, her mouth is always open. It's like she's constantly talking. Who knows who did what. At least she has the financial backing to start a new life.

1229 days ago
371.

Scott    

The whole Kennedy family is "unstable" this should be a perfect match.

1229 days ago
372.

GRAMPZ    

NOT A FAN OF EITHER SO MATTERS NOT TO ME. ON THE LITER SIDE, HATS OFF TO MARIA FOR CUTTING HIM OUT OF HER LIFE IF HE WAS PLAYING AROUND LIKE SHE HAS MENTIONED. TOO BAD WE VOTERS COULD NOT HAVE DONE THE SAME THING YEARS AGO. TERMINATE THE TERMINATOR SO TOO SPEAK.

1229 days ago
373.

ALEX     

WHO GIVES A DAMN IF THEY OR NOT,WHEN HE WAS A GOVERNOR HE DIDN'T CARE FOR US POOR PEOPLE NOW WE SHOULD FEEL SORRY FOR HIM?F*&@K HIM.

1229 days ago
374.

Althegreat    

well if you have fame these women do appear like the footballers wives but life changes and the finance before a star marries they sign forms now so then both party's cant rip each other off who's the lover of money women who spends more women.my last marriage knew some thing was wrong so I just said i want one answer do you love me she said no so I left why stay when your not wanted i.m honest good worker jack of all trades good cook love home life love animals love people got thousands of friends and happy and go lucky chap and ? and not bad looking but in my book money is't every thing only health is.

1229 days ago
375.

Joe    

I would have told that bitch to go **** herself sidways

1229 days ago
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