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Arnold and Maria's Split -- A Long Time Coming

5/10/2011 5:16 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF

Maria Shriver has been "miserable" in her marriage for a long, long time, sources connected with the couple tell TMZ ... and it's all about Arnold Schwarzenegger's "craziness."

Arnold Schwarzenegger Divorce

We're told Maria moved out of the couple's L.A. mansion months ago.  Sources tell us she's been extremely unhappy in her marriage for years, complaining about Arnold's out of control ego, as well as his womanizing.

We're also told Maria feels Arnold has ignored her for years and she's felt terribly unappreciated.

Sources say the couple has spent "very little time together" for several years.  Maria was frequently absent from Sacramento while Arnold was Governor. 

The situation got worse once Arnold left office and decided he wanted to resurrect his movie career.  Maria felt Arnold was becoming more erratic -- more "unstable." 

Our sources say Maria's religious views caused her deep distress over whether to split and/or divorce.   As one source put it: "She's been a lost soul for a long time."


Maria -- Contemplated Divorce for Nearly 2 Years

Maria Shriver has been deciding whether to DIVORCE Arnold Schwarzenegger since 2009 ... but sources with direct knowledge tell TMZ, she's been "extremely conflicted."


We're told Maria has been unhappy with Arnold for years ... and first planned to split with him back in 2009 ... but her mother passed away and Maria decided to hold off.

Then, we're told, Maria wanted to try to break it off again in January 2011 ... but her father died ... once again putting the split on hold.

Our source tells us Maria is fed up with Arnold's infidelities ... coupled with the fact he's been "impossible" to live with. We're told Maria's kids acknowledge the issues -- and have pushed their mother to call off the marriage.

People who have spoken with Maria tell us ... despite her STRONG public persona, Maria has become a "shell of the woman" she appears to be because she is "terrified" of Arnold ... but in an emotional, not a  physical way.

However, once Maria finally decided to separate from Arnold  -- and moved into a fancy Beverly Hills hotel -- we're told Arnold pulled a 180 ... and he's been "working extremely hard" to win her back.  As one source says, "He could not be sweeter now that she's left him."

To make things even more complicated, Arnold and Maria have been spending LOTS of time together lately ... hanging out during Easter, Mother's Day and even their 25th anniversary ... which they celebrated together at an expensive hotel.

A source close to the couple tells us ... despite their differences, Arnold and Maria have "serious chemistry between them" ... which is why she has such ambivalence about the break-up.

But ambivalence aside, Maria has been "miserable" in the marriage and has taken a big step to end the relationship.

Arnold Schwarzenegger -- The Ring Disappears

Hours before the world knew about his separation ... Arnold Schwarzenegger broke out his street bike and went for a ride with his bodyguard in L.A. yesterday ... sans wedding ring.

But Arnold WAS wearing his ring on Sunday ... the day before the couple announced their split.

Meanwhile, Maria Shriver has been ringless since mid-March ... right after Maria posted a cryptic video on YouTube asking her fans for advice on how to "transition" into the next phase of her life.051011_maria_shriver_still

As you already know, Arnold and Maria announced their separation last night ... and in their statement, they claimed they've been living apart for several weeks.

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POOR POOR DOOTISE,,, you'll never know what it's like to have a brain, because if you had a brain you would have realized this was written by a FEMALE ya putz !!!!!!!! Not to mention I wasn't speaking to your nosey azz anyway.

1198 days ago


Arnold may not have been a peach but she picked him. Now there's no doubt Maria is not happy. Some woman are never happy. Everything has to be thought over 12 times and it could always be better. Guess us lower class slobs call them a bitch.

1198 days ago


Gina came the closest to understanding the truth....all of those other comments lack the maturity and wisdom of what actually can happen to someone when they have been betrayed in such an ego altering and publicly humiliating way. It rocks your world in a way that is unimaginable. It makes you question EVERYTHING in your sphere. The hardest part is coming to terms with the reality of it all.....because what you thought you knew to be true about your partner (that he loves you and is faithful to you, that the life you have created togther is important to him also) is NOT true. When children are involved and you are well known in the community, the outside pressures complicate your decisions even further. Celebrity makes the whole situation harder....imagine that your husband was larger than life and people are always clamouring to get to get pushed aside even if you are Maria Shriver....I can say all this because I have first hand experience....I am going through the exact same thing. Mother of 5, married to a high profile man and have endured alot mostly to protect my children. ...Maria needs her good friends and family to rally around her and support her. Arnold will be fine.

1198 days ago


Maria saw that it was an 'oil and water' mix, where she was bullied by her conservative governator husband. She is a great liberal thinker and needs to get away from the repression of her husband's austere thinking. She dropped the bomb on Arnold, so now she will be free to think and do as she pleases. She should have made the move five years ago.

1198 days ago


Either way you look at it, marriage is not to be taken lightly. I cant speak for Maria, but Ive lost a lot for AHHHNALD.

1198 days ago


Well now I hope she can feel better and eat something

1198 days ago


I happen to KNOW firsthand how religious Maria is. If she is even considering a separation ,she MUST be mserable in the marriage. In the olden days she would have been one of those long suffering Kennedy women. She is young. There is no reason for her to take abuse & live the kind of life he is providing.
Good luck Maria--I am backing you ALL the way.

1198 days ago


Perhaps she can get a role as wicked witch of the the West?

1198 days ago


Dusty, I was thinking the same, she must think she has a pedigree, which must make her a dog.

Aenold is a typical Amrican immigrant success story, liberals and leftists hate that, they all want us to adore their kings and queens (elitists)...LOL

1198 days ago


Typical ego-centric American (!) male--once he's used her for the political position she could help bring him, he drops her like a booster rocket. Chin up, Maria, you'll find your way. At least you got four good kids out of the deal.

1198 days ago


who cares-they are are typical lefties who degrade everyone else but themselves.

1198 days ago


Is this news? really? marriages don't suddenly fall apart. I suspect their marriage has been on the rocks for 24 and 1/2 years. Maria, like most women, probably justified his behaviors and stayed forthe children. At the end of the day, Oprah will have the REAL exclusive. She is one of maria's best friends. Go OWN!!!

1198 days ago


women are happy till the ring slides on....then they get bored....then not happy.....then come up with all the abusive lies to cover up all the cheating...yes guys cheat too...everyone will cheat when giving the right situation and opportunity.....out of town...dinner out..few drinks...feeling loose...yep and theres a knock knock on your door...and it happens even to loyal spouses..and the truth hurts...if ya dont want cheated on...then dont roll the dice in the gamble of marriage!!!!! and so it goes.... Maria looks chemically induced guess we will see her in next round of celeberty

1198 days ago


lol @ Linda G , WOW typical body builder, stereo type much...listen to yourself,,,take him to the cleaners,,,,,looks like you have the typical skank ego problem,,,,,just because your husbands a terd......dont go haten !!!! dont worry we will see who Marias been banging for the past few years...lmfao!!

1198 days ago

Paloma Diamante    

If I hear the word transition one more time I will explode. Listen sweety, it seems that first you lost who you were when you married because you did not continue doing what you loved, then you completely dissappeared when you hooked up with the bottle or drugs (do not tell me different). You are too young to look as old as you do, you look horrible.
You want to know how to transition, here goes:
First of all let go of that which you think holds you together, be it liquor, drugs or insecurity,
Second, gain a few pounds, fill in (Do NOT go stretching yourself medically).
Third, surround yourself with those who help push you forward in a possitive manner.
Fourth, decide what it is you want to do with the rest of your life and just DO IT. God knows you have the money and connections at your disposal.
Feeling sorry for yourself gets you nowhere and even though friends and family may seem to understand you they also get tired of the POOR ME song.
Should you choose to save your marriage my advice to you is BE A BIGGER B--CH THEN HE IS AN A--H--E.
If life has taught me anything about men, it is that none is worth sacrificing myself for.
----------TIME TO ACT MARIA----------------

1198 days ago
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