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Arnold and Maria's Split -- A Long Time Coming

5/10/2011 5:16 AM PDT BY TMZ STAFF

Maria Shriver has been "miserable" in her marriage for a long, long time, sources connected with the couple tell TMZ ... and it's all about Arnold Schwarzenegger's "craziness."

Arnold Schwarzenegger Divorce

We're told Maria moved out of the couple's L.A. mansion months ago.  Sources tell us she's been extremely unhappy in her marriage for years, complaining about Arnold's out of control ego, as well as his womanizing.

We're also told Maria feels Arnold has ignored her for years and she's felt terribly unappreciated.

Sources say the couple has spent "very little time together" for several years.  Maria was frequently absent from Sacramento while Arnold was Governor. 

The situation got worse once Arnold left office and decided he wanted to resurrect his movie career.  Maria felt Arnold was becoming more erratic -- more "unstable." 

Our sources say Maria's religious views caused her deep distress over whether to split and/or divorce.   As one source put it: "She's been a lost soul for a long time."


Maria -- Contemplated Divorce for Nearly 2 Years

Maria Shriver has been deciding whether to DIVORCE Arnold Schwarzenegger since 2009 ... but sources with direct knowledge tell TMZ, she's been "extremely conflicted."


We're told Maria has been unhappy with Arnold for years ... and first planned to split with him back in 2009 ... but her mother passed away and Maria decided to hold off.

Then, we're told, Maria wanted to try to break it off again in January 2011 ... but her father died ... once again putting the split on hold.

Our source tells us Maria is fed up with Arnold's infidelities ... coupled with the fact he's been "impossible" to live with. We're told Maria's kids acknowledge the issues -- and have pushed their mother to call off the marriage.

People who have spoken with Maria tell us ... despite her STRONG public persona, Maria has become a "shell of the woman" she appears to be because she is "terrified" of Arnold ... but in an emotional, not a  physical way.

However, once Maria finally decided to separate from Arnold  -- and moved into a fancy Beverly Hills hotel -- we're told Arnold pulled a 180 ... and he's been "working extremely hard" to win her back.  As one source says, "He could not be sweeter now that she's left him."

To make things even more complicated, Arnold and Maria have been spending LOTS of time together lately ... hanging out during Easter, Mother's Day and even their 25th anniversary ... which they celebrated together at an expensive hotel.

A source close to the couple tells us ... despite their differences, Arnold and Maria have "serious chemistry between them" ... which is why she has such ambivalence about the break-up.

But ambivalence aside, Maria has been "miserable" in the marriage and has taken a big step to end the relationship.

Arnold Schwarzenegger -- The Ring Disappears

Hours before the world knew about his separation ... Arnold Schwarzenegger broke out his street bike and went for a ride with his bodyguard in L.A. yesterday ... sans wedding ring.

But Arnold WAS wearing his ring on Sunday ... the day before the couple announced their split.

Meanwhile, Maria Shriver has been ringless since mid-March ... right after Maria posted a cryptic video on YouTube asking her fans for advice on how to "transition" into the next phase of her life.051011_maria_shriver_still

As you already know, Arnold and Maria announced their separation last night ... and in their statement, they claimed they've been living apart for several weeks.

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The annual horse race brought a lot of celebs to Churchill Downs and a lot of wild headgear with them.

Kate Gosselin, Erin Andrews, Marisa Miller and even Tom Brady were seen in their Derby best, check out the gallery of sightings above!

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Marie Brown    

What a shame people can't keep it together anymore! I look back at my high school years in the 50's and not one of my class mates came from a broken home. Even marriage vows have been changed and today, we have "Earth Day" where mother earth is becoming a God? The Kennedys have made a mockery of the Catholic Church.

1228 days ago


I am once again saddened and angered at how 80% of YOUR responses lack the proper English grammar. We've become a bunch of IDIOTS! "She should OF known", instead of "She should HAVE known" What a bunch of stupid idiots we Americans are spawning.

Crying about illegal immigrants...AMOST all of whom can probably spell better than you.

1228 days ago


Massive amounts of steroids have finally taken their toll on Arnold .I met Maria and Arnold once and she was very rude to me .She tried to get my attention and she was yelling HELLO HELLO like I was a little kid .However it was like 110 degrees outside and she was pregnant .I would have been a little grumpy also .

1228 days ago


In her gut, she knows it's time to move on/out but religion is a guilt maker...God will forgive, just leave and see what unfolds...if she's not happy and he wants to flirt and touch others (doesn't make a wife feel loved or respected) then time to move on to another chapter. Remember "this too shall pass" and be open for change. It won't kill anyone but might make stronger as one does need to dig deep and rely on inner strength and God to get through the tough times. Religion is a teaching tool. Spirituality is what lives in us and guides us. God does not want us to be abused or feel abused or live with abuse.

1228 days ago


Another great choice California made for their governor... the land of fruits and NUTS.

1228 days ago

lawrence thomas    

Its not the whining skeleton thing that's got Aunode on the run, she's always been this way. It's a host of manic depressive-like complications, vaginal dryness and other digressions of age that come at the worse possible time for Aunode as he has his own health issues resulting from years of steroids and, more recently, a viagra resistant affliction of e.d. These people could never possibly have grown old together.

1228 days ago


JerMan, speak for yourself. My baby has a doctorate degree.

1228 days ago


she aint happy! poor maria! who is happy? after 25 years with someone she should have the morals to stay with him and quit complaining. do you really think she will get happier without him? no! her life will be exactly what she makes of it. she isnt happy because she is depressed, nothing to do with arnold. she is to old to remarry, and if she did she would not be any happier. i say hit the road maria and good luck.

1228 days ago

gposner can't live with can't kill them...
So money really doesn't by love? Perhaps it's all about control..Women who can't control everything...freek out!!!

1228 days ago


I agree a 100% with Gina (see below...)


"Wow. I am totally in sync with Maria Shriver's feelings of aimless confusion. You have this idea of life and how it should go, you throw all your eggs into one basket, you try to be the best person all around that you can be, and then WHAM! It all blows up. The personal meltdown of a marriage can be beyond devastating. It's earth ****tering...and the journey is long and difficult. Trust is gone. You're lost in the desert of emptiness. I wish I could talk with her and lend some support---woman to woman. I didn't realize she wrote a book...I'll have to check it out. She's strong...she comes from strong 'stock.' I'm sure in time, she'll be the victor and an encouragment to other women. The bottom line is that this world is falling apart...morally, spiritually, and emotionally. It's a dog fight...and dog eat dog world. Pathetic. Lastly, men, and the women they cheat with, are nothing less than animals in heat. May as well all go live in the woods. Truly."

1228 days ago


Really people... commenting on people's privates is disgusting. She always was very thin. You have no idea what a person is REALLY like unless you live with them or know their in house hired help. She had NO idea about people outside her sheltered life and had no understanding that "I love you" does not mean that a person will treat you well, respect you, or be faithful. Men in general have a much coarser being than women. When they are wooing they hide it. Once they think they "have" you via attatchment or marriage their true nature shows and it usually is NOT a pretty sight. Seeing how their father treats their mother (really) is a good view on how they might treat you. However, nothing is written in stone. He likely is thinking twice now because he will loose half of his wealth, lots of face and class. He could attract a nymph or air head but no one with "class", hopefully, which is OK for him as he does not need that in a woman now. He is established in Hollywood and is a Bankable Star. Postivac and meds can fix any steroid related problems he has: or some other technique... and that is NO ONE'S business but his. People bring enough problems to their lives. They don't need anyone's bad wishes. NO one is perfect except a perfect jackass and there are plenty of those.

1228 days ago


NO, I don't think I could kiss that.

1228 days ago


Arnold best buddy for years is a wealthy bachelor named Alan Wurtzel. They were known for their escapades with women in the west LA area. Wurtzel is now the poster boy for bad behavior in Los Angeles. Arnold is very ambitious and he seems to use whoever he can to get what he wants. Maria an Arnold used each other. He got legitimacy and prestige from being married to her, and she got a boost in publicity and her "cool" factor. Its an even swap in my opinion.

1228 days ago


It is OK as we always have known Arnold the terminator is part Gay

1228 days ago


Maria, has know what Arnold was like and that she, his wife, was not the only woman he was taking to bed, during their marriage. She, the so called "Brain", stayed in the marriage, helped him to become Governor and to live the lie. Her Grandmother Rose also stood by her man, old Grandpa Joe, why he even brought one of his lovers, Gloria Swanson, to live in their home, in MA, with Rose and the children. Rose had no choice but to stay with him as her parents refused to have her move back home. That was then however this is a new day and age. Marie, saw how her Grandfather and Uncles treated their wives and yet, with all her money and education and smarts, she decided to stay with Arnold. Her decisions, show what little respect she, (the brain), has for herself! Her Decisionss = Her Results!

1228 days ago
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