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"Lost" Diary -- Tricia Tanaka Is Dead

3/1/2007 11:45 AM PST BY TMZ STAFF

Hey, it's Daniel from TMZ here, back with another edition of the "Lost" Diary.

I have come up with the theory that there are four times when I am super-mega excited for an episode of "Lost": a season premiere, a season finale, the week after a great episode and the week after a terrible one. So since last week's ep was such a dud, consider me super-mega excited for this week.

For all you "Lost" Diary newbies, here's how it goes. I gather with a group of friends watching "Lost," writing what happens on the show as it happens, and throwing in my two cents along the way. This week the usual crew of Ari, Lauren and Matt is back together. Let's roll:

10:00 -- Cheech is Lil' Hurley's dad, and apparently, he thinks you can fix cars just by wishing. He's been hanging around Chong too much if you ask me.

10:01 -- Lil' Hurley's dad sneaks him a candy bar. So of all the mysteries of "Lost," is this the episode where we learn why Hurley is fat? Food isn't love, little guy.



10:02 -- Odds Hurley is talking to Libby's grave?

10:03 -- Too easy.

10:04 -- Charlie is shaving on the beach. Gee, I hope he doesn't nick an artery ...

10:05 -- Hurley thinks he might be the reason that Charlie is going to die. Note to self: send Hurley some sausages as a thank you present.

10:06 -- Vincent returns holding an arm, which is holding a rabbit's foot and a key. That doesn't even make the top 20 list of weirdest things that have happened on this show. Hell, that's downright normal.

10:07 -- Did Hurley just find a car?

10:09 -- Tricia Tanaka is reporting on Hurley buying Mr. Cluck's, and the title of this episode is, "Tricia Tanaka Is Dead." Hmmm, I am not liking Tricia's chances here.

10:10 -- Actually, I don't like her chances of coming out of that chicken joint alive.

10:11 -- Poor Tricia, we hardly knew ya.

10:12 -- Hurley just found the van from "Little Miss Sunshine," except it's blue instead of yellow and instead of Greg Kinnear and Alan Arkin inside, it has dead Dharma workers .

10:13 -- Ugh, the new people. Why, J.J.? Why?

10:14 -- No one wants any part of Hurley and his blue van, except for Jin, who can't speak English. Even the stupid new people bailed.

10:15 -- At this point, if Sawyer and Kate are on screen -- and NOT having sex -- Lauren is disappointed. I can only assume she speaks for most women on this one.

10:16 -- Kate wants Sawyer to say he's sorry. Maybe it's just the guy in me, but I have no clue what he has to apologize for.

10:17 -- Kate and Sawyer arrive back at camp, congratulated by tons of people we've never seen before. Touching. Where are Rose and Bernard?

10:20 -- "Tricia Tanaka is dead." -- Hurley. Well said.

10:21 -- Hey dad, where you been the last 17 years? Oh, a fat joke? Thanks for that, pops. Good to see you.

10:22 -- "Dude, I suck at charades. You wanna what?" -- Hurley. Best line I have heard so far by someone who couldn't understand Jin.

10:23 -- "I have a right to know when I'm gonna die." -- Charlie. I have a right to know too, since I have that big party to plan when it happens. Yes, you're all invited -- but it's BYOB.

10:24 -- Alright, don't tell anyone this, but the Sawyer-Hurley-Jin reunion choked me up just a bit.

10:25 -- Ok, Kate is telling Sayid that Jack said he told Sawyer and her not to come back, because he sacrificed himself so they could escape. That's bull. I am telling you: Jack doesn't want them to mess with his "going home" and he doesn't want to face them again because he'll feel guilty. Now is probably the time to tell you I am almost never right with any theory I have about "Lost." Just thought you should know.

10:26 -- How much of this season has been spent watching one person explain something that already happened -- and that we already knew -- to someone else?

10:27 -- Kate is going for help. Rousseau, anyone?

10:30 -- Hurley looks really happy that his dad is home.

10:31 -- When Hurley's mom says "Hugo" like "Hoogo," I kinda giggle a bit every time. New rule: whenever Hurley's mom is around, I will refer to him as Hoogo. Starting ...

10:32 -- Now. Hoogo's mom wants some Cheech lovin'. Good for her.

10:33 -- "What's up with all this recycling?" -- Sawyer. Hmmm, lines like that usually aren't said for no reason.

10:34 -- Take your bets, will the car start? I am going with a resounding no.

10:35 -- The correct answer was "not even close." We would have also excepted "absolutely not." Thanks for playing.

10:36 -- Did Sawyer just "cheers" with that guy's skull?

10:39 -- I hate being awakened in the morning, but being awakened by Cheech would be a welcome change of pace.

10:40 -- Odds the psychic predicts doom and danger in Hurley's future? I am going with hells yes, and done so with terrible over-acting.

10:41 -- The correct answer was darkness and tragedy, mixed in with a stupid curse-removal ritual, which was all fake because Hurley's dad is a scumbag.

10:43 -- "Let's look death in the face and say, 'Whatever, man.'" -- Hurley. William Wallace, he ain't.

10:44 -- Sawyer shouldn't be teaching anyone English.

10:45 -- And Hurley shouldn't try insulting people. Redneck man? Weak.

10:46 -- Ok, seriously -- now "Lost" really has turned into "Little Miss Sunshine." Hurley is Greg Kinnear (the over-positive one), Sawyer is Alan Arkin (the wiseass) and Jin is the son who doesn't speak.

10:50 -- So what are the odds Charlie volunteers to drive the car down the hill? I say yes, followed by some stupid speech about cheating death. Followed by him succeeding and not dying. Followed by me hurling expletives at the TV.

10:51 -- Charlie volunteers to ride shotgun. 0 for 1.

10:52 -- "Victory or death." -- Charlie. Kinda cheesy speech. 1 for 2.

10:53 -- Hurley is closing his eyes and repeating, "There is no curse. You make your own luck." If you were wondering the exact moment this episode lost me, this is it.

10:54 -- Car starts, Charlie doesn't die. 2 for 3.

10:55 -- Sawyer and Jin jump into the car, kinda like they do in "Little Miss Sunshine."

10:56 -- "F&^@_!*$@#^!)&!!@!$!" -- me. 3 for 4.

10:58 -- What the hell was Sayid talking about with the light hitting Mr. Eko's stick and leading them to the Others? Did I black out when that happened? One last prediction: Kate tells Rousseau about Alex.

10:59 -- Too easy.

Okay, so what did we learn this week? Everyone on this show has daddy issues ... Hurley wasn't always fat ... When we're not looking, Sayid and Locke use Eko's Jesus stick as an Others compass.

After last week's debacle, I was looking forward to a return to form. Did I get it? Let's just say I will be typing that sentence again next week. This episode was almost as bad as the week before. But it did give me the gift of Hoogo, so I will give it a D+. Nothing happened, our story didn't move forward, and the flashbacks didn't reveal anything interesting.

But now an even more important issue has been raised; I used to never watch promos for "Lost" -- I either left the room or covered my ears and closed my eyes when they came on. I never want to know anything that is going to happen the following week. But to make myself more educated on all things "Lost," I started watching them.

You know what? They don't tell you s**t. In fact, they lie to you completely. Last week was about the three mysteries. This week was something about "If you don't watch, you won't know what everyone is talking about the next day." Hey ABC, you know what I'm talking about today? How much your promos suck!!!

So here is the question of the week: I am going back to avoiding all commercials and promos like the plague. Are you with me?

See you next week.

132 COMMENTS

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Previous 15 Comments | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6
76.

Mandie    

This episode was not much better than last week. Maybe now that Rousseau knows about Alex and helps "rescue" Jack we will find out how Henry Gale A.K.A. Ben came to be Alex's dad. I think Rousseau is hiding some big secrets. She did say that everyone who came to the island with her became sick and died..right? But maybe she was part of The Others at one point and did not want anyone from the plane crash to know.. I want to see her flashback! Maybe that map Hurley and Jin found in the van leads to where The Others live on the island.

2607 days ago
77.

bel    

I thought the episode brought the two different plots together. Since the season finale, we haven't heard about Michael or Walt or even seen most of the original characters. A little fun backstory plus no additional questions. I think it was just fun. But I totally hate the new people...but not as much as I hate the mom on Heroes. She BUGS.

2607 days ago
78.

cmac9000    

Nicki and Paulo look like they walked straight off a runway in Milan and on to the beach. They completely throw off the vibe of the show-and hey they had enough eye candy already...Kate, Sawyer, Sun, Jin, and Jack-they were pretty enough for me. Where the hell did Vincent come from? did he swim back to shore?...I say time to advance the plot as quickly as possible and yes Nicki and Paulo should really die-maybe the polar bear should come back and maul them to death.

2607 days ago
79.

Steve Pain    

Charlie Goodlooking??? Are you kidding me? That's one UGLY DUDE and I believe Evi Lilly is just giving hium Pitty P***Y. Death to Charlie!

2607 days ago
80.

Charlie    

Once again I'm dissapointed with this week's episode. It seems like the writers are throwing a lot of fillers our way. I would much rather see flashbacks from The Others than the regulars. I thought Juliet's flashbacks were the beginning of a trend but I guess they want the Others to remain mysterious.

I didn't really learn much from this episode because we all know that when Kate and her friends gets back to the other island, Jack will be gone. We also see that Sawyer really does love Kate and also how much Kate loves Jack.

Lets hope the writers get with the program next week and show us something tangible.

2606 days ago
81.

Judy    

I love Charlie. I guess I am the only one who doesn't want him to die. I am soooo sick of Kate and Jack. I do like, Sawyer, though.

I was disappointed in this episode because it didn't go anywhere. But... I thought it was fun to watch because I think Sawyer and Hurley are hilarious! I didn't understand the part about Sawyer stepping on a dart and it went into his boot. The boots looked pretty thick. I guess the rain has washed the poison or whatever off the dart that's been there for, what, 16 years?

I agree that the promo's suck. They make more of a mystery than there already is!

2606 days ago
82.

edonline    

I never thought that I would get tired of the characters but I am. Sawyer's constant nicknaming and general bad attitude towards everyone and everything; Hurley's strange dichotomy in that he believes that he and his life are cursed and yet at the same time believes in making life on the island "fun"; Charlie's lack of purpose on the island other than knowing he is going to die (big suprise there!). And then there are the remaining supporting castaways who do nothing, especially Rose and her husband, whose story was sweet and touching, but who are nowhere to be seen.

2606 days ago
83.

Janice    

No, this wasn't the most informative for the plot, but really really enjoyed the humor. It was good to see Sawyer and Hurley and Jin smile and have a good time. Even Charlie got in on it little. Though I don't think he broke his curse. He's still on the chopping block. Anyway, love to see my boy Sawyer happy. Still love the show and will watch every single episode til the end.

2606 days ago
84.

Macy    

Thank you for bringing up the Vincent thing, I never thought of that. It could be because watchng this episode I did not have to have my eyes glued to the TV so not to miss anything. I do think that Ben stole Alex and raised her as his own. But I also know that Rousseau has had an inkling that Alex is alive after the episode last season where we learn what happend to Claire when she was taken by Ethan. My thoughts on Kate and Sawyer. I think Kate wants Sawyer to appolize for the way he has acted towards her since they had sex. He is acting like it did not mean anything. As for Jack leaving the island, I do not see happening unless Matthew Fox gets to big for his britches and decides he needs to leave for those big movie roles.

2605 days ago
85.

Anne    

I missed Hurley/"Hoogo" so I was happy to see him again. I think next week will be better, hope so anyway. I think maybe the "real" Desmond was blown up with the hatch, wasn't he holding a key on a rabbits foot? Next week maybe Cheech will show up again as one of the Others.

2604 days ago
86.

Carol Lynn    

Had to comment on when you said, "At this point, if Sawyer and Kate are on screen -- and NOT having sex -- Lauren is disappointed. I can only assume she speaks for most women on this one."
NOT AT ALL! CANT STAND to see them together! I like Sawyer and all, but it grosses me out to see them together! Im a Jack fan all the way. Sawyer is just too greasy...eewwww!!!

Yeah, we didnt learn !@#!, but it was a pleasant happy epi. But yeah, what a waste of our time when it came to the main story. Oh well.

And yes, I remember the stick thing. That clue was waaaayyyy back when Echo died! Like, a year ago!?!?! sheeezzz.....

2604 days ago
87.

Kissy    

Yes, "Lost" is begining to lose my interest, but I discovered it's bearable with the help of herbal medication.

2602 days ago
Previous 15 Comments | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6

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