Brian Williams -- Can You Spell H-Y-P-O-C-R-I-T-E?

5/30/2007 3:19 PM PDT
NBC anchor Brian Williams said "NBC Nightly News" would not be reporting on Lindsay Lohan's vehicular escapades on Tuesday evening's newscast ... due to a "lack of time!" But earlier reports of old age home Wii players and wacky wedding dancers -- plenty o' time!

This weekend's photos of Lindsay Lohan's car crash were front page news worldwide, but when Williams was asked by the Boston Herald about LiLo's antics being on his broadcast, the uptight news nerd said, "It does not and it won't be NBC Nightly News ... we have Justice Ginsburg reading her dissent today from the bench. We have record violence in Iraq. ... We've got a whole lot to cover and very little time." Oh really?

The "Nightly News" managed to find the time for the earth-shattering news of videogame-playing geezers, the vitally important news of the hot new teen craze sweeping the nation -- needlepoint, and the life-or-death reporting on novel wedding choreography. Clearly, this is hard news compared to the travails of our beloved Firecrotch.