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Charlie Sheen on Firing -- 'This Is Good News'

3/7/2011 6:57 PM PST BY TMZ STAFF

TMZ has obtained a statement from Charlie Sheen on his firing from "Two and a Half Men" today:

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 "This is very good news. They continue to be in breach, like so many whales. It is a big day of gladness at the Sober Valley Lodge because now I can take all of their bazillions, never have to look at whatshiscock again and I never have to put on those silly shirts for as long as this warlock exists in the terrestrial dimension."



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229 COMMENTS

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1.

Quanisha    

This fool done lost his damn mind.

1295 days ago
2.

documented_as_puzzling    

seems like a fellow that means what it says and says what it means unlike so so many a person that find it easier to pretend than to be what they really are -

1295 days ago
3.

MacGuffin    

Duh! Losing!

1295 days ago
4.

Areader    

Get help Charlie, you're a talented actor, get yourself some good qualified rehabilitation. Remember, America loves a good comeback story!

1295 days ago
5.

Abe    

Charlie is totally f*ck*d now. His only hope for career salvation is Celebrity Apprentice or Dancing With The Stars next season.

x

1295 days ago
6.

Moshe    

Do you think Carlos Estevez will take “the goddesses” with him to Haiti when he travels there to help buddy Sean Penn? And will he keep the webcasts (Sheen’s Korner) coming from that devastated country?

1295 days ago
7.

yo    

Sheenpocalypse || by Christopher Rosen || 03 07 2011 9:30 AM

‘Violent Torpedoes of Truth’: Sheen Threatens to Cut Children's Throats

“People die, dogs die. What are you going to do? Bring them back? You’re not me.” And so the sad case of diminishing returns known as Charlie Sheen finally reached a nadir during the second episode of Sheen’s-Korner (anyone want to explain the dash?), when the former Two and a Half Men star revealed his outrageous God complex following the death of his dog Betty. Even Malice-era Aaron Sorkin would have a hard time writing the ‘torpedoes of truth’ that Sheen fired off like a manic Col. Kurtz during his latest web-based shot at infamy.

Using an iPhone — Apple must love this free publicity — Sheen filmed a conversation with his “Tweet Master” Bob Maron, where the two men discussed — among other things — the disastrous first episode of Sheen’s-Korner, and whether or not the “host” should appear more two-sided to his fans.

“There’s one side to me and it’s me,” Sheen said in the rant-y fashion that has become his trademark. “Two sides to me is a f*cking lie, cause all I’m gonna give them is the f*cking truth, and I’m gonna deliver it in a way that’s violent and focused and not like they’re used to. Ever. ‘Cause they’re high on vaccines and McDonald’s and Us Weekly and TMZ and every other ****ty brand of food that they consume.”

Bashing TMZ wasn’t the only time Sheen threw a previous ally under the bus. In the beginning of the video, he also had harsh words for Howard Stern and the format of radio show.

“Howard Stern [hosts a show with multiple people contributing on air]. It’s lame, it’s retarded, it’s transparent, it’s the f*cking work of trolls. Why not just leave that to a man who only wants to talk about anal and stupidity?”

Judging from this latest video, the only thing Sheen wants to talk about is his contempt for the audience. “I’m gonna write my sermons, I’m gonna deliver them like truth torpedoes and people are gonna f*cking take it or leave it — we know they’re gonna take it, ‘cause they can’t process it so they must condemn it,” Sheen said, Gabbo-style. “And if they can’t condemn it, they’ll f*cking like, turn me into a god, and worship it, and then realize that I’m behind them cutting their throats, and their children’s…” The video cuts there, in a choppy edit. Stay classy disgusting, Charlie.

Somewhere, Sean Penn must be really excited he invited a humanitarian like Sheen to Haiti.

Watch the full, NSFW second episode of Sheen’s-Korner below.

http://www.movieline.com/2011/03/violent-torpedoes-of-truth-second-episode-of-charlie-sheens-web-show-gets-ugly.php

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1295 days ago
8.

NatTxn    

Great move on CBS' part! This guy needs help, and eventually, when enough of the dominoes fall, he'll be forced to see he has a problem....hoping it's soon!

1295 days ago
9.

Mike    

That's the end of Charlie Sheen.

1295 days ago
10.

smashley    

good that show blows anyway.

1295 days ago
11.

the artist formerly known as hand turkey    

Pathetic, Charlie Sheen, Loser Losington.

1295 days ago
12.

azxardsgirl    

Translation: the drugs won

1295 days ago
13.

yo    

Fired by WB!

Fired by his kids!

Fired by both exs!

Fired by one of his Goddesses! (Bree is happily in Indiana)

Fired by HBO before he even started!

Fired by the watchers of his own webcasts!

Fired by his own brain!

1295 days ago
14.

rainbow    

How very sad. Here is someone who had the world at his feet and he is throwing it all away. I sincerely hope he gets the help he needs.

1295 days ago
15.

Kari    

IT'S GOOD NEWS FOR US TOO, CHARLIE---WE ARE SICK OF YOU!!!! Just one question--why, just last week were you still trying to get your job back? Is it also" good news" that the mothers of your children don't want you around them? Is it also good news that in a matter of weeks, you have turned yourself into a national joke? Have you seen Jimmy Fallon do Charlie? It's hilarious!!

1295 days ago
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