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Maria Shriver

My Son Can Kick Your Son's Ass

11/30/2013 11:35 AM PST BY TMZ STAFF

1130-Maria-Shriver-Christopher-shriver-x17Arnold Schwarzennegger's 16-year old son Chris is no longer an adorable little kid ... he's a BEAST who looks very much like he could kick the crap out of you.

Chris Schwarzenegger and his mom Maria Shriver were cruising around Santa Monica over the holiday weekend... and the famous kid has clearly packed on a ton of muscle and TOWERS over his mom.

As you might recall ... Arnold's love child Joseph Baena turned 16 in October and also bears a striking resemblance to his beefed up dad.

So we gotta ask ...



No Avatar


Sure, TMZ rub it in.

Remind Maria and Arnold, and for the rest of time.

-How an opportunistic, disingenuous maid...

Parlayed an indiscretion.

Into a sizable upgrade of her own being/life.

I hate Opportunists and Player's to the very core -

Of my being.

Having been burnt, smoked -

By two very, very good ones.

But that was yesterday...

And yesterday's gone...

291 days ago


If you've ever been tricked.


Made a complete fool out of -

You can empathize with Arnold -

This maid lied to him, conned Arnold at every turn.

Knowing a child would lead to great ridicule and horror -

For not just Arnold -

But Maria - and all of their children.

TMZ's mostly a great website.

And I have the highest regard/respect for Harvey.

But this twisted-little-story-and-maid.

Disgust me.

With that great big proud smile on her face.

Each time she's photographed ...

I pray her Son becomes someone ... she wasn't/isn't.

291 days ago


Last of it and I'll go to the gym:

Had Mildred gone to Maria and Arnold.

Quietly discussed the indiscretion and result.

She would have HAD their respect.

The respect of one Maria and Arnold -

Forever and ever.

But no.

She had to play-the-game.

Turn on them.

Disgrace Arnold.

Or at least try to -

Arnold's accomplished way too much to be disgraced.

By some fat little lying, lurid, twisted maid.

May all the players in the World -

Die painfully.

291 days ago


For the Mildred_Baena's/Ann_ Sham's of the World:


The Poem


Player, Player
You Is Slick

Player, Player
What A Trick

Player, Player
Ha-Ha You Won!

Player, Player
You Is Done

291 days ago

John T.    

lol beefed up?? Some one needs glasses, he is FAT. The other kid will whip his ass. He is on the ugly side.

291 days ago


Quick change to the last stanza:


Last stanza re-write:

Player, Player
Hee-Hee You Won

Player, Player
You We Shun

291 days ago


It would not be much of a fight i think it would go straight to wrassling for each others frank & beans !

291 days ago


Stop being so stupid and immature TMZ. Are you that desperate for something to put on your lame site that you're pitting child against child to beat the crap out of each other? There could be brain damage among other injuries.

291 days ago


Gosh TMZ, this is kinda mean pitting 2 teen brothers in a azz kicking comparison. You actually suck to do this. Cut these teens some slack - they did not ask for their family drama.

291 days ago


Chris looks very much like he could squeeze the crap out of you when he lays on you . . .

291 days ago


They both kind of look like Shrek.

291 days ago


Maria's son looks like baby huey with that huge gut and that tiny head. Consuela's son looks like a tard period.

291 days ago

david 183    

Damn leave the kids out of it . Putting two brothers against each other is very tacky. As if they don't have enough family drama going on.

291 days ago

Yurra Knutz    

--...Who'd Win in a Fight?...--

Or, or... option three... They could team up, be awesome brothers, discover the cure for wherever and have great lives.

Why fight without cause (or profit?)... Just sayin'

291 days ago


that first kid is just fat! He has no strength and looks extremely out of shape, the other one is at least leaner and has a hell of a lot more endurance. No question the second kid would win

291 days ago
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