Brit to Judge - You're an "Old Fart"

Always looking for ways to further antagonize the law, Britney Spears went off on the judge in her custody case during her shopping spree at Neiman Marcus -- just after her hearing last week.

"I hate my judge," she growled, according to Us Weekly. "He is so mean. Just an old fart. He told me I was being catty with him, but he was being catty with me and paid me no respect at all." What does Brit-Brit think a judge does? "His job is to sit there and tell people what to do," she said, allegedly. "And that's just so sad, because he gets off on it."

Meanwhile, Lance Bass tells GQ in its November issue (via People) that he's tried to reach out to Britney, but without success. "I don't think she's having any of her old friends anymore," says the ex-boybander.

Before she took her current gig as Hans Klok's assistant, Pam Anderson was putting together a crazazy $10 million strip club deal that involved a between-the-legs car wash, among other assets.

Vegas Confidential reports that Pam was working with Scores owner Dennis DeGori, and that the club was to be called The Burning Bush, and that its signature feature was a supersized sign with her legs as an archway. Cars could drive between the gams, and get a car wash, with the shower coming from, um, between the legs.

As for Pam herself, she would make just four two-hour visits a year. She scrapped the idea because she "didn't want to hurt her reputation." Exactly.

At last, a bit of Michael Jackson news that doesn't induce a shudder or a shrug. FOX News is reporting that Jacko is putting together a 25th anniversary edition of "Thriller," and that four of the tracks from the original album are being redone for the new version.

"Billie Jean," "The Girl is Mine," "Wanna Be Starting Something" and "PYT" are being redone by none other than Kanye West, Akon, and will.i.am.