New Orleans Saints superstar Cam Jordan says he's no ass-slapping maniac ... denying ALL allegations he went crazy inside a New Orleans nightclub. 

As we previously reported, Jordan was named in a police report by a woman and her boyfriend who claim the NFL star got handsy in the club, sprayed them with champagne and called the lady a "bitch."

But in a statement issued through his attorney, Jordan says he did NOTHING WRONG -- "The allegations in this police report are ridiculous. Cam Jordan did not cause a disturbance of any kind."

"This complaining individual is apparently a jealous boyfriend who followed Mr. Jordan into the men's bathroom. "

"Mr. Jordan did not commit any criminal offense whatsoever and continues to remain cooperative with any law enforcement inquiry into this situation."