TMZ TV

Miley Cyrus has the body of a 19-year-old -- because she's 19 -- but that's no excuse for wearing butt-cheek revealing daisy dukes! That's what a few ancient 20-somethings think, anyway.

Let's pretend Kris Humphries is telling the truth (it could happen) -- and Kris Jenner actually forced Kim Kardashian to reshoot her sex tape. That doesn't make her that terrible of a mom, does it?

Some amazing Kate Upton video taught the TMZ staff a hard lesson about patience -- something you obviously have if you're still reading ... instead of watching the video. Stupid.

Mike Tyson may be heading to Broadway -- but that won't stop his fiercely loyal fans from showing him some up close and personal love ... at any given moment.

Jessica Simpson's only been photographed once since starting Weight Watchers -- so we're guessing the next time we see her ... she'll be in Daisy Dukes shape. Ok, we're praying.

Kris Humphries hasn't done much to win over his former in-laws ... which is why it was extra surprising when Khloe Kardashian -- aka "The Bearable One" -- came to his defense.

Channing Tatum better watch his back -- because some pissed off male strippers are accusing him of jacking their moves for "Magic Mike." Let the battle of the bulges begin!

George Clooney is having a kid ... is a sentence you'll never hear. But that didn't stop one gullible guy in our newsroom from thinking Clooney's GF Stacy Keibler was sporting a baby bump.

Jason Gann plays a pot-smoking dog on "Wilfred" -- but in real life fiction he says Snoopy and the "Peanuts" posse are the biggest stoners. Hmm ... that would explain Charlie Brown's shirts.

Boxing champ Floyd Mayweather really needs a pacifier -- 'cause he's a huge whiner! Money's begging to get out of jail, but fortunately for us (after airing this) ... the judge shut him down. Waaugh!!!

No one understands Chris Brown and Drake's nightclub beef better than TMZ's own highly qualified hip-hop experts -- y'know ... the white guys.

Bob Marley's daughter Karen critiqued Jamaica's best non-agricultural export ever -- classic bobsledding flick "Cool Runnings" ... which everyone at TMZ loves! Well, almost everyone.

Kanye West's alleged twitpic of a naked Kim Karadashain turned out to be some OTHER hot chick with a nice butt who has sex on tape. Hmm ... time to research?

The New Jersey Devils had a rough time scoring on the L.A. Kings -- which didn't stop them from trying to go top shelf ... on a couple of chicks outside their party bus! What Stanley Cup defeat?

ESPN's Erin Andrews' tiny bikini exposed two HUGE questions: are her assets real or fake -- and does it matter? The answer to one of those is obvious.